my cat is completely obsessed with watching the bathroom sink drain and I have started calling this "her shows." as in when I'm in the bathroom and she meows and runs up I'll be like "oh you want to watch your shows?" and run the faucet for an extra few seconds so it fills a little. she will then sit there at the edge of the sink for ages totally entraptured by the drain. blorbo from her sink

u survive literally every single event in your life & still every time a new event happens you feel like this is the event that will kill you and that you will never move on from but actually you will continue to survive like you always have bc u have a 100% win rate of surviving events. btw

👽😡HEY ALIEN FUCK OFF😡👽 🖕🖕FUCK YOU ALIEN 🖕🖕 🤬🤬🍆SUCK MY DICK🍆🤬🤬 🖕🤬🖕FUCK OFF🖕🤬🖕FUCK OFF🖕🤬🖕 ❌👽🚨ANTI ALIEN ALARM 🚨👽❌ 👽🚫NO ALIEN🚫👽🚫NO MARCIANITO🚫👽 🤬🖕FUCK OFF🖕🤬🖕FUCK YOU🖕🤬🖕FUCK OFFFFFF🖕🤬 🚫🌎GET OUT OF HERE🌎🚫 ❌👽❌ANTI MARCIANITO❌👽❌ 😡😡NO😡NO😡NO😡😡 🖕🖕FUCK YOU🖕🖕 😡😡😡NO😡😡😡 🌎➡️➡️➡️LEAVE🌎➡️➡️➡️LEAVE ME ALONE🌎➡️➡️➡️ 😤😤😤BWAAAAAAAAAH😤😤😤 🌎➡️GET OUT OF HERE🌎➡️GET OUT OF HERE🌎➡️ 🛡️🛡️🛡️🛡️PROTECTIVE SHIELD 🛡️🛡️🛡️🛡️PROTECTIVE SHIELD 🛡️ 🛡️🛡️🛡️PROTECTIVE SHIELD 🛡️🛡️🛡️🛡️ 🚫🧛‍♂️🚫NO DRACULAS🚫🧛‍♂️🚫🧻🚫NO MUMMY🚫🧻🚫👽🚫NO ALIEN 🚫👽🚫🧌🚫NO DUENDE🚫🧌🚫 🚨🚨🚨ACTIVATE ALARM🚨🚨🚨CANNOT APPROACH🚨🚨🚨YOU WILL DIE🚨🚨🚨 😡😤😤😫😫AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHH😡😤😤😫😫😡AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHH😫😫😤😤😡

people say dolphins are smart but there not smart enough to not be Shity grey rubber tubes flappin about in the gotdamn ocean

*they’re

congratulations! you are the piss lord of shit mountain. thank u for hefting turds down the mountainside so that we, the proles, may feast on your bounteous craps

I just laughed for one year watching this. The casual walk-off is just deadly.

the will is weak the flesh also is weak and me i am not doing too good either