Bring Me The Booty

Thank god.

Millennials are killing awkward father-son bonding dinners.

WHY DO THEY PUT CLOTHES ON DISPLAY ON MANNEQUINS AND THEN MAKE IT A FUCKING SCAVENGER HUNT TO ACTUALLY FIND IT IN THE STORE

why is she lightly tapping on her shoulder while she is literally riding her man in front of her eyes????

What a roller coaster

he is a man of fortune

1 reblog = 1 bountiful blessing from the man of fortune

Reblog if it’s ok for people to give you $599.99

Please don’t hesitate

1 penny below reporting limit for the IRS… I see what you did there

Reblog if it’s ok for people to give you $13,999.99

tony is gay what the fuck do you mean ally

Gentle reminder that the human eye is naturally drawn by noise and movement, so the next time you walk into a crowd or a bit late into a lecture or something like that, they’re not staring at you or judging; it’s just an instinctive reaction that has nothing to do with you doing anything wrong.

This really helps my anxiety.

Is there any hatred stronger than the rage kids get towards Barney the dinosaur as soon as they are just a little too old for Barney the dinosaur

This is the realist post on my dash

Fuck, Millennials are fucking hilarious

I always feel better about youths after a good vine comp.

t-t-t-t-t-target!!!!!

“Bitch cone get me, not only is he ugly but his dishes talk!” “Who you talking to Belle?” “Uh… No one…. bitch that was his plate!”

I want to adopt him.

I hate that the Dairy Queen cashiers have to flip your blizzard upside down before giving it to you. I hate it. I know it’s most likely going to stay in it’s cup and I know I get a free one if it doesn’t, but the cocktail of a potential disaster and the cashier apologizing to what is most definitely a horrified me, having to sit in a drive-thru while someone behind me just bore witness to my fucking salted caramel blondie blizzard splattering on the asphalt, melting away while they mix me another one and i pray to god that they don’t flip it upside down again, is just a stress that I find entirely unnecessary. I trust it’s thick, just give me your word and i’ll be on my merry way.

I just imagined how it would feel to have them flip your second blizzard and have it spill too and I felt my shoulders physically tense

I’ve only been to DQ like 3 times in my life but the 2nd time I ordered a milkshake or something and I heard about DQ drinks not spilling when you flip them. I was not aware that this ability was only relegated to their blizzards. So long story short I said “hey, look at this” to my family and they watched me pour my milkshake on the ground.