rai

I doubt the show will touch on it, but the immense guilt Chen Yi must feel that Eddie willingly followed him down this deadly path instead of being a normal teenager who goes to high school would be a good reason he doesn't allow himself to reciprocate Eddie's feelings. Because Chen Yi knows Eddie is a smart boy, yet he decided to not go to school . . . since he loves Chen Yi.

Eddie chose to enter into a life where death is around every corner, and he did so because of his devotion to Chen Yi.

And Chen Yi is constantly confronted by that.

Chen Yi tries to nudge Eddie in a different direction each time, but Eddie refuses to leave Chen Yi's side.

So Chen Yi calls Eddie brother. He reminds them both that the bond between them is synthetic. Eddie doesn't have to abide by it. He could leave.

Because he has to know Eddie isn't there to be his brother. He knows why Eddie is offering his life in exchange for as much time as possible with Chen Yi. Even if his life is short, he will have spent it next to Chen Yi. So even if Chen Yi genuinely has feelings for Eddie, to act on them would mean to permanently cement Eddie's life with his where the only outcome seems to be a young death.

And that's a huge burden to carry. Someone's life has been benevolently laid before him without hesitation, yet he desperately wants that person to live.

Even if it means a life without him.

Flower Language Based Prompt List I made instead of writing 💐

I tried to make the prompts relate to each flower’s definition per the Victorian Flower Language without getting too repetitive.

The prompts are all fairly open ended and I figured people could use them for their own inspiration or request games!!

You know the “send me a ship and flower and I’ll write something.”

Anywho, if anyone does end up using this I’d love it if you’d tag me so I can read what you’ve written!! Either way, I hope someone can get use out my procrastinating 💖

Okay, so. Someone mentioned this, and I agreed so much that I had to talk about it. Thinking back about what I said in this post, not only has he figured out what he wants, and it being clear to him, (as someone mentioned) he also sees that Win needed just as much comfort as Team did. From what I've seen so far from these two, Win it much more affectionate than Team is. It's not to say that Team isn't, it's just that Win is much more comfortable expressing his affection than Team his currently. Aside from sex, we've only see Team really kiss him on one occasion and it was a quick one. The other times we see any sort of affection come from Team is during the many nights that he spends with Win, and again, it's mostly Win comforting Team to help him sleep.

I think this kiss is not only making things clear to Team about how he feels, but it's also him comforting Win in the only way that he knows how to, in this moment. Sure, hugging can do the same thing, but it's not as meaningful as what Win does for him on nights that he has nightmares and can't sleep. Win is practically experiencing his own nightmare and the only way Team can think to calm him down, and to keep him from making himself sick with worry is to physically show him. He is sad, he is upset, he is scared, but he is also acknowledging that Win, too, is sad, he is upset, and he is scared. So this makes Team feel even worse for causing Win to feel this way, and he understands more now just how much he really means to Win, so he kisses him.

When we left our red- and blue-coded boys, they were exchanging their colors and emotions like it was easy peasy lemon squeezy.

Well...until they realized they caught feelings and questioned their entire lives, so now they are seeking comfort in their own colors trying to sort out those pesky emotions.

And they are struggling! After a night together where Team asked Win for exclusivity yet refused to commit to a defined relationship, both boys are lost (at sea, but trying to be an anchor for each other).

Team is devoid of color much like he was at the beginning of episode two after speaking to his mother, and Win is losing his color as well, which is difficult to do when his closet only features blue.

And the little blue Win does have left, he gives to Team before they leave the safe space.

*Win fixes the tie symbolizing order and submission while Team looks fully in the mirror representing his awareness of what Win is doing to him, yet Win does not look in the mirror until the end because he hasn't faced the truth of how much he truly cares for Team, which we heard in the preview for next week

Win's brother, Wan, is also struggling with the absence of color, but luckily he has Tul unknowingly providing him some blue (and support).

Team is also showing up in small ways to support Win that Win seems unaware of.

*the label on the tie and the bottom of Win's shoes are red

They won't see each other throughout the day (no practice) or that night (Win is going home, and Team is staying with Pharm), so neither can find their way back to their natural element.

*You might be thinking "they are just sitting in a different class" and "Win is outside, so trees are green," but this is the same classroom as the day before when they decided to sit in the red chairs (Manow talking in the red chairs while the green ones are in the background), and Team sits in the green when he is conflicted (the day he skipped classes).

*And Win sits in the blue unless he, too, is conflicted

Dean comes for Pharm, which leaves Team on his own. He is still reeling from the conversation he had with his mother and with Win the night before yet won't see Win at all, so he goes where he can find blue.

But his anxiety grows the longer he stays. He can't concentrate because everywhere he looks, he is reminded of all the things he wants to forget - Win's absence and Ton's incident.

Then we see the transition from Team's red into the blue through the pool rope as his anxiety and stress overwhelms him and he experiences a cramp

*Some of the ropes are colored this way while others are red and yellow. The colors serve a purpose. The red indicates that the wall is within a certain length, and most likely will be the shallow part of the pool, while the blue denotes the deeper portion of the pool. We haven't seen this transition from the red into the blue until Team becomes increasingly distraught because he is entering a deeper state of emotions

Which causes him to sink to the bottom.

Team is drowning in the deepest part of the pool

Everything Team has been trying to avoid is now dragging him down into this deep dark blue (depression). Win will save him from the pool, but Win can't save Team from the issues he keeps bottled up, and Win himself, through the previews, seems likely to become one of those issues.

I mean this with my whole being in the gentlest way possible, Team.

Is Win actually meant to be a player (a la Prapai from LITA or Khai in TOL) or is that meant to be a misconception that Team has built up in his head?

Team obviously has a lot of anxiety about the casualness of their relationship. And the conversation he has with ABC at the bar in ep 3 seems to confirm that Win has a lot of options. But just because a lot of girls like Win doesn’t mean he’s dating them, and this information is coming from people who don’t know Win any better than Team does.

The narrative so far never actually shows Win playing the field or fending off admirers. There’s no scenes of girls or boys flocking around him or of him deleting numbers etc. Tul and Dean tease him about not being serious with anyone, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that Win dates lots of people–it could just imply that the people he does date don’t move beyond casual.

It doesn’t imply that he was sleeping with her, just treating her as he would anyone else. But I think Win is so good at taking care of people in general that Win’s baseline is way above how most people expect to be treated. He treats Team to food, but he does the same thing for the entire club in the novel. Look how casually he opens Team’s bottle for him and then goes back to eating without fanfare. It’s not supposed to be an act of kindness specifically for Team like allowing Team on his motorcycle—this is just what he’d do for most people he’s treating to food because it’s a nice thing to do and he’s used to taking care of people.

(It’s the fact that Team notices and points it out that makes it notable, because Win doesn’t do it to get praise.)

I also think Win meant what he told Team when he said he doesn’t care if girls like him. He doesn’t even seem especially aware that it does happen. He’s probably so mired in his “nothing lasts and no one will stay with me” belief that what Dean said is true:

ALT

I’d say he’s had sex and he gets how that works, but I wouldn’t call him a playboy. He might carry the reputation because he’s openly bisexual and he’s been out since high school, but he also canonically doesn’t care what people say about him because he’s “used to it”.

That’s where I’m at, anyway! The novel never really makes him out to be a playboy, and the series seems to be going with the same tone. There’s also this moment from episode four’s side story:

ALT

Which I found really sweet and amusing because like. I think “flirt” here might have been slightly mistranslated, because they seem to mean like. Woo or court. And it implies that he’s never tried to get someone to like him or date him before.

AND TEAM ACTUALLY HAS. So I think it’ll be cute if, like, while the beginning has Win firmly on the more experienced end of things with their physical relationship, the middle is where he flounders because he’s never had an actual relationship before. And as we know, he’s convinced he’ll never have one that lasts.

So much angst potential. :’)

Though I wouldn’t have minded if Win was a playboy (or reformed playboy i guess), I think it’s really interesting to have his reputation not quite match up with who he really is. It feels realistic for someone like Win who is at once confident in who he is, but also doesn’t open up readily to people he isn’t close to. If we factor in his bisexuality, like you and @seoulmates98 brought up, then there’s just enough ammunition for people to come to all kinds of wrong conclusions. I hope the series more openly addresses Win’s sexuality, since so far they seem to be talking around it. But it also fits for Win’s character to be unconcerned and maybe even oblivious to what other people think of him, since he is confident with himself. Unfortunately, if he’s not aware of his own reputation, he might not be clued in to where Team’s anxiety is coming from.

I get what you mean about Win’s baseline being kind and helpful without ulterior motive. On the one hand, Win’s altruism makes him really likeable and trustworthy (he really occupies that sweet spot of a bad boy who feels really safe *swoon*), but on the other hand, I empathize with Team’s anxiety that maybe he’s not special and Win does this for everyone because he’s a nice person. I wonder if Team latches onto the playboy idea in order to manage his own expectations so he won’t get too attached and end up disappointed? I think the show has been doing a good job of telegraphing to the audience the many ways that Win treats Team differently, while also not making Team stupid for not realizing how much Win cares for him. The angst doesn’t feel contrived even if it is unfounded!

The side story was so cute! And I LOVE the idea that Win might actually be inexperienced about courting someone. He’s sexually experienced, and comfortable flirting/dating casually, but has no idea of how to make someone his “officially” since he never thought that was in the cards for him. Amazing! I’m obsessed with it actually. And I love the idea of Team being a bit more adept in that realm (even if he still has to ask Pharm what love feels like).

ACTUALLY this is really reframing the Shrimp Feeding scene for me. Because, my understanding from watching many BL’s, is that the person doing the courting usually shares their food…but Win doesn’t instinctively give Team his shrimp, Team has to ask for it. We know Win is naturally generous and caring, but it doesn’t occur to him to do that courting ritual until Team says “All the girls love soft and gentle guys.” Team is implicitly saying, “don’t treat me like an equal (aka one of the homies), treat me like someone you’re dating/trying to date.” And that clicks for Win that feeding Team is something he should do and it’s an expression of care that Team wants.

I cannot believe this is what we're getting in week three. Anxiety and nightmares, comfort and protection, Win looking out for Team even as Team struggles just to find a place for himself. They start these regular competitions to try to help their swim team only for Win to realize that this is hurting Team and then to seek to help him, to love him, to protect him and the way Team stiffens in his nightmares, the way he doesn't seek anyone out but tries to keep it to himself but in the end Win is still there and suddenly the way he touches him, treats him, teases him in UWMA makes even more sense because their nights are so serious, their nights are filled with so much that the days must be smiles and gentle to make up for that.

This scene is actually set between episodes 1 and 2 of Between Us

We know this because this happened BEFORE Team called off ‘sick’! Because later on in UWMA we get the moment where Team isn’t in Uni and Pharm gets his loud noise trigger - 

This means that the scene in Team’s bedroom where Win brings him food  ISN’T the first time they’d interacted since the swim camp! THEY’VE SHARED A CAR HOME TOGETHER AT LEAST ONCE before Win told Team ‘yo I did actually enjoy hooking up with you’ (which makes me wonder where did Team think he was dropping Win off if he didn’t realise they live in the same building?)

Now, we see this moment happens even little later on in UWMA; in the scene where Pharm meets Team with snacks after his swim practice, Team says that Dean left earlier in the evening:

This means that THIS SCENE:

Is happening at the SAME TIME as THIS SCENE:

Ok so we know that Team’s love language is food. That’s really fucking obvious. Win’s love language? Quality time. he wants to be with Team all at times, for as much time as possible, doesn’t give a shit whether they’re just grocery shopping or even watching horror movies that he hates. It’s quality time.

I love this scene so much, because it shows an understanding of each other and what each other values. Whether consciously or not (probably not as much consciously on Team’s part, I think) they both offer each other what the other cares about most. Team could’ve been satisfied with being bribed with snacks, lunch, and more snacks. Could’ve even just added a giant bucket of popcorn to the list for himself and you KNOW Win would’ve agreed without hesitation.

Win thought Team and Pharm were dating

This is why he asked...TWICE!

And this is why he snatched the food Pharm made Team!

And why he demanded a ride, so Team couldn't pick up Pharm or take him home.

Win has a strategy. This kid is playing the long game!