in dog years im dead

will you please take my whimsical ass seriously

i invite you over to my house and while we're greeting each other at the door i turn around and yell "down boy! DOWN! NO!" and you just see a caterpillar moving very slowly across the floor toward you

since the gun emoji was taken from us i’ve just been building my own contraptions

🔩🪠🪔    🧰 it might not look like it but i just got your ass with a thingamajig

Your father use to roleplay as a tape worm for my pleqsure

hope he did a good job at least. Didn't embarrass the whole family.

He strutted his shit kinda

Fuck. Those fuckers at the store sold me No Purpose Flour again. What the fuck do I do with this

[grantaire voice] i dont believe in myself or the revolution but a secret third thing

jellycat is fucking insane... they actually made a mouse with the bluebell flower in its backpack