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My little sister, like all curious kids, will ask about somebody with a physical visible disability if we pass them in public. I never quite know how to answer? I know that you're not supposed to make a big deal out of it because it can imply that people with visible disabilities are "wrong." Do I encourage her to ask the person with the disability instead of asking me, do I encourage her to ask not in front of them, etc etc etc? I want to encourage her curiosity and solidify that people with disabilities are normal people, but I also know hearing, "what's wrong with them?" is not the best feeling.

Do not assume anything about the person's disability. For example, if someone has a scar, do not assume how they got it.

If she says "what's wrong with them", clearly state that there is nothing wrong with them, their body just works differently. Always correct her if she uses disrespectful language.

Yes, you should discourage her from asking in front of someone, but make sure you explain why: disability in of itself is not shameful, but some people feel embarrassed or uncomfortable about their disabilities. Plus, it's just rude to comment on someone's appearance in public unless you're complimenting them, regardless of if they're disabled or not.

Your explanation of a disability should include its main symptoms* and possible causes. It doesn't need anything else, unless she asks further questions. Also: do not hesitate to say you don't know. Please, do not just make up something on the spot or assume or guess, just say you don't know. There's already so much misinformation around disabilities, do not spread any more.

too many people completely separate disability from themselves in their mind. it's something that happens to other people. other sad people i don't want to think about. are they really even people, it's too much to bear thinking about that happening to a person... those background characters over there. it would never be me, i can't cope with thinking about that possibility.

this mass denialism of the fragility of the human body (YOUR human body) has created a whole category separate from the disabled - the "elderly." since anyone can join it if they live long enough.. no they can't be disabled. that's scary, and worse it's political. so they are just "old." so what they lost their hearing, their mobility, their heart function? that's just how it goes for old people. as if that's not a person as real as you. as if you wouldn't be devastated if that happened to you today (and it can btw). as if you won't be when it's your turn to be old, and disabled.

My grandparents lived to 98 and 103. Read that again— 98 and 103. My grandmother died 5 months ago and was born in 1923.

She was extremely wealthy. My grandfather left her millions. She paid about 13,000 a month for her care.

And her nurses abused her. She could do nothing. She could not speak for herself, feed herself, clothe herself, and the humiliation they made her endure was disgusting. When she tried to express discomfort, they gave her drugs to “keep her calm” (keep their shift easy). We fought like HELL to hold that fucking place accountable. The only reason we were aware is because we hired a private nurse on her behalf, too.

The elderly are a massive, extremely vulnerable, and disabled group. You cannot leave them out of your advocacy, you cannot leave them out of the conversation. “They’re loud, they smell, they’re opinionated, they’re rude, they make me uncomfortable”. I don’t care. I don’t care! They need your advocacy too! I want you to think, if my grandmother— who was in the best retirement home she could afford, with a personally hired third-party nurse to step in where the other carers failed, had such abhorrent care… what about everyone else? What about all the elderly who don’t have a support system?

Trans people don't have to smile through transphobia and gently correct you

Nonbinary people don't have to smile through exorsexism and gently correct you

Intersex people don't have to smile through intersexism and gently correct you

People don't have to smile through their oppression and correct you with gentle voice and simple words. A black woman getting angry and loud at anti-black racism is not less deserving of your attention. A trans man being rude to someone spreading transphobia is not less deserving of your attention.

-Mockery of speech patterns or behavioral patterns

-Mockery of "useless" products (aka products that help disabled people)

-Mockery of people with "childish" interests

-Making fun of brain damage

-Making fun of small brains

-Making fun of or demonizing plurality

-Stigmatizing cluster B, schizospec, or paraphilic disorders. Misusing the terminology. Throwing around words like narcissist, psychotic, psychopath, sociopath, pedophile, zoophile, necrophile, etc

-Misuse of the words empathy/sympathy

-Constantly joking about psychwards

-Constantly joking about lobotomies

It's beastiality, not zoophilia.

Its corpse desecration, not necrophile.

"You're being pedantic!" People tell me, even those within mental health movements themselves.

So is it pedantic when people point out that narcissistic is not the same as "egotistical/self-absorbed/emotionally abusive"?

Is it pedantic when people point out that psycho, psychopath, and sociopath aren't the same thing as "criminal/abuser"?

Is it pedantic when people point out that schizophrenic, psychosis, and delusional aren't the same as "quirky/lying to oneself"?

Is it pedantic when people point out that ADHD and autism are not the same as "being quirky"?

Is it pedantic when people point out that low/no empathy/sympathy is not the same thing as "being cruel"?

Is it pedantic? Or are you just unwilling to admit that paraphilic disorders are stigmatized, and that thousands of non-offending paraphiles get demonized by your statements?

Is it pedantic? Or are you just unwilling to recognize that most predators do not have para disorders [link], and that even those who do are predatory because they're bad people, not because of their condition?

When will ya'll admit that you're unwilling to give up the concept of an "evil disorder"?

[PT: Is it pedantic? Or are you just unwilling to admit that paraphilic disorders are stigmatized, and that thousands of non-offending paraphiles get demonized by your statements?

Is it pedantic? Or are you just unwilling to recognize that most predators do not have para disorders [link], and that even those who do are predatory because they're bad people, not because of their condition?

Being Deaf

Being disabled

Audism

Ableism

Intersectional discrimination including ableism and/or audism

This blog is run by Heishi from @primadonna-sys, a DeafDisabled host of a system.

General rules for interacting with this blog:

Be kind and respectful towards your fellow disabled and Deaf people. This is a safe space for all of us.

If you are Hearing and abled, do not comment or add anything when reblogging, including in the tags. This space is not for you, do not treat it as such.

Do not ask me for information unless it is about how to deal with discrimination or how to use this blog. This is a vent blog, not an educational one.

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If necessary and possible, tag trigger warnings using the format stated at the bottom of this post. If it is not possible for you to do that, it's okay, I will.

You do not have to be polite when venting, you may be mad and rude.

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I'm not being an asshole when I tell you that obviously we don't use American Sign Language in Australia. (/directed)

I'm not being an asshole when I tell you not to push me when I'm in my wheelchair without asking.

I'm not being an asshole when I tell you you're being ableist.

#idk why disabled ppl are expected to be 24/7 nice abt everything when everyone else doesn’t have to be

(From pavo-oceiius)