Flocculent Anorak

This is a sfw anthro novel, inspired by my favorite manga, Beastars. It will have some whump, mafias, and a male yandere. This will be updated every time I finish a chapter. Please enjoy. <3

She awakes in a giant bed with soothing, warm covers around her meager body. But this wasn’t her bed, this wasn’t her room. A beast kidnapped her. The sounds of loud footsteps seemed to loom closer to the room she resides in. Her breath and heart quickened, the door creaking open…

Beau, a female grizzly bear, has her life shattered when a heartbroken beast kidnaps her. Fogged by his refusal to remiss the happiness of the past. Torn between feeling pity or fleeing from this nightmare. It may rip her mind and body apart.

Chapter One - Paranoid

Chapter Two - Anguish

Chapter Three - Nightmare

Chapter Four - Insanity

Chapter Five - Hope

Chapter Six - Raven

Chapter Seven - Stray

Chapter Eight - Allusion

Chapter Nine - Monster

Duko

♧ 23 : 00 ♧

The sound of the strong wind hitting my roof has finally gone down, I can only hear the soft sound of the wind. The house makes no sound; my dad is asleep. It’s time to make my move.

I jump out of bed, go to my closet, and grab an empty backpack. How do I pack for something like this? Normally Dad would have an idea, but he’d tear me to shreds if he found out what I was doing.

Food is the most important thing—water bottles and a few bags of snacks. In the corner, I see a pocket knife. Something my dad gave me when I was starting high school. I never used it, maybe it has a use for me now. Maybe I could use it to protect Beau in some way… or myself. Just in case.

I put on the thickest clothes I had, open my window slowly to not make a sound, and jump out of it. I look around, not a beast in sight. Perfect.

I begin to run through the snow, looking at the directions I scribbled on a piece of tissue paper. I should be at Klimarock in no time. But something loses my train of thought.

“Each new idea seems genius, but it’s more idiotic and dangerous than the last.”

I look back at my house, where my father is sleeping, not knowing that his son is going to be gone for a few days. Should I really do this? I don’t know what I’m going to face, or how I could escape dangerous situations.

But I have to try. I have to do it for Beau.

***

Beau

I wake up, my vision blurry and my throat still dry. The headache must be causing it, but I can’t remember what happened. I was in bed, closed my eyes for a split second, and it felt like I’d slept for a century. I must have passed out from the heat.

For some reason, my room feels… cozy. I don’t want to move. The sound of the soft crackle of the blazing fireplace soothed my ears. The thick, large blanket covering my body as I lay on the couch felt like sleeping on a cloud. A wet towel laid on my forehead, cooling the smoldering heat on my head.

I closed my eyes, hoping to go back to sleep and dream of a comforting world.

Wait.

Leo doesn’t have a fireplace.

I shoot up, letting out a soft whimper when I notice how aching my limbs feel. Like thousands of needles stabbing at my body.

“Hey, hey, shh…” Leo rushes to my side, softly grabbing me a slowly lowering me back down. “Don’t move, you need to rest.”

“Where are we?! This isn’t your house!”

“Don’t you remember? We are in the cabin we’ve dreamed of forever.”

I look at him with complete horror on my face.

“There’s nothing to be afraid of,” he smiles, cupping a paw to my cheek. “We’re away from the cruel world, away from the monsters that want to take you away. No one can brainwash you into your fake life ever again.”

Panic tugs at my chest, my eyes struggling to focus as I take in the information. I am in a random cabin in the woods, with no knowledge of the environment. How am I supposed to escape now?

I’ll never get out of here.

“What’s wrong? Don’t you want this? We’ve been dreaming about such a life ever since we first met…”

“No!” I yell, not being able to comprehend this nightmare. “Why would I want this?! I…”

I don’t want this, I never wanted this. But every time I protest, I remember those horrifying words.

“I need to get rid of you, I need to get rid of you. Every trace of you.”

If I say anything that leads to him snapping out of his delusion, he’s going to get rid of me. I’ll never be seen again.

“…You don’t want this? Why? Oh, Soleda, what did I do wrong?”

“You didn’t do a thing wrong,” I give him a big smile. “I’m just so overwhelmed by how happy I am.”

***

Duko

I’m on a whole other planet.

Everything flashed in my face. Signs for booze, gambling, and beasts who are desperate for a mate.

Not many beasts are outside, just the occasional bum sleeping on the sidewalk. This is so much different from Sycamore Woods. Loud music blasting inside establishments, broken bottles of beer scattered on the road… my nose hurts from all the new smells.

I don’t know how I’m going to handle this. Or find which beast would help me. I guess I should do what I always do to find something—use my nose.

And I smell many scents of herbivores, and… blood?

I look down and see a homeless goat. He didn’t have any horns, just a bandage around his head. He was covered by a dirty, ripped-up blanket. I regret not bringing more money because I could give this guy something to help him…

“You look wealthy; not used to seeing a beast without somewhere to stay?” he said with a hoarse voice; I didn’t realize I was staring at him with a tilted head.

“Not where I live… I’m sorry, I wish I had some money or food I could give away.”

“I’ll tell you what,” he moves the blanket to reveal the matted fur of one of his legs. “Maybe I can ask for a deal. How about $100 for my leg? Cheaper than other offers in the market, I assure you.”

I widen my eyes, realizing I am right next to the black market.

I’ve heard stories about the black market, where most meat is from dead beasts that died from natural causes or murder. Some raise cubs from birth for slaughter. My father said to never go to such a place. Because even if you’re just going for a visit, you’re always going to leave with something to eat.

Yet the smell of blood and meat, such a new and nice scent—it made me drool. And it’s difficult not to give in.

“Hello?”

“I… I can’t… I’m sorry, I don’t have the money. And… I don’t want any.”

“Sure, you don’t,” he eyes me as I wipe my mouth.

“Yeah, I don’t…” knowing how this town is, now I need to get what I came for. “Do you… know who could help find a beast I’m looking for..?”

Duko

“Never return to my house again, or I’ll kill you.”

His threat rings in my head as I walk away from his house, shivering. What was that? He said he would kill me. For just questioning him? Why was he so defensive? It was as if he was responsible for her disappearance…

Then I remember that smell.

It hit me the second he opened the door—he was covered in it. It was fresh. I couldn’t put my finger on it at the moment but it all makes sense now. His defensive demeanor, the nasty threat…

It was Beau’s scent.

What would Mr. Santifelon want with her? I’m terrified of the thought of what he’s doing with her. I shake it away. The only important thing is getting her back.

***

“I found her!” I yelled, running inside the police station.

“Already?” Chief Paunchy said with surprise, looking at me with a skeptical look. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure! I smelled her fresh scent all over Mr. Santifelon’s house! Let’s hurry.”

“The superintendent? What would he want with her?” They all stand up, running around the station and grabbing items. This is happening. We’re going to save Beau.

We run outside, everyone going into the cars with flashing sirens, me following behind. I look out the window, seeing the snow begin to slowly fall. Happiness stroked through me like a comet. Hours of searching worked. I found her. I’ve done something I’m proud of.

The car stops, and everyone gets out. I shake some snow off my snout, as it begins to gather on my clothes. It’s falling faster now.

“Police! We have reason to believe you are keeping someone hostage,” he bangs on the door, waiting for an answer. “Mr. Santifelon?”

Nothing. He starts launching himself at the door. Twice. Thrice. the door bursts open, and everyone rushes inside with guns drawn. The whole house is engulfed in her scent.

But I don’t see anyone.

Every room is filled with both their smell, but they aren’t here. The rooms feel bare, as if items were taken. Items are scattered around the house, showing signs of a haste.

“They aren’t… here.”

Outside the snow falls rapidly, building up the snow on the ground. I stare at the large surrounding woods. The snow would cover all footprints and scents. I have to try and catch him.

“We have to go search the woods!” I yell at all of the cops. “They couldn’t have gotten far!”

“Look at the weather, can’t you see there’s going to be another storm?” The chief argues. “We could die trying. It’s just too dangerous.”

I stare at the woods, snow catching on my fur. He’s probably taking her far away now. Far away from her family, from her town… from me.

My best friend got taken by a monster.

***

The storm booms outside as I cover myself with my covers. I chew on a bone—a habit I never got rid of since I was a pup.

“Did you find her?”

I see my dad in the doorway, looking at me with a sincere worry on his face.

“We know who took her, but not where she is. The police are spreading the news everywhere. Mr. Spera isn’t taking it well…”

“I heard. It’s best just to wait. With all the snow, searching for her would be like walking in a maze.

“If there was any other help I could get… where could I find it? What beast would risk their life for a female they don’t even care about?”

“A Klimarock beast. That’s where I used to live when I got in with that gang. They’ll do anything you ask, but not without a great price. May it be thousands of dollars, drugs, or doing something that could get yourself hurt. But going to a place like that wouldn’t be too smart.”

He steps out, about to close the door.

“I love you, Duko. I hope you find that friend of yours.”

“I love you too.”

Beau

“Oh, you poor, poor, thing.”

Leo looks at the beeping thermometer with worry, silently signaling that my fever has not gone down.

This morning I fell with a fever, and it has only gotten worse. My head throbbed every time I moved, my muscles ached as if my bones were shattered. So I’m bound to my bed.

“Oh, dear, oh, dear,” Leo rambles about, looking at me as if I’m about to die. “It’s only getting worse, you might faint from overheating! We can’t have that, oh, no, we can’t…”

Leo hasn’t been any help. He’s been giving me home remedies and soup. While I do enjoy his cooking, it isn’t going to do a thing to help me. He seems too busy worrying like I’m bleeding out. I hope I faint soon, so I can finally rest from all of this…

“Can’t you just bring me to a doctor?” I ask, trying to keep my voice as soft and sweet as I can.

“My dear, outside is scary and dangerous, those evil beasts might brainwash you again. Then we’d be separated… You don’t want that.”

“I don’t,” let’s try to make my voice a bit more soft. “But I’m sick, and I need help… don’t you want to help me?”

He looks deeply into my eyes, looking like he’s considering it. Yes, bring me to the doctor, then I’ll get saved, finally…

“Some… Some more soup my help. I should just try to keep you company while I try to find some sort of medicine.”

Damn it.

He gets into bed with me. He wraps his arms around me so tight like he had the intent of crushing me to death. He gently lapped my forehead, purring as he rubbed his scent all over me. I’m getting sick of being handled like this…

“I promise you’ll get better, my sweet Soleda… it won’t get worse with my help.”

I give him a smile, not knowing how long I can keep up this act before someone saves me.

***

Duko

I have a good feeling about finding Beau.

Mr. Spera and I agreed to meet up in two hours and go around the neighborhood knocking on doors and asking questions. We both think she was taken, so this is a chance to find her captor or get clues.

I step into my house, locking and closing the door behind me.

“I heard what happened to that female bear you’re friends with,” My father says once I notice him. He stands up and walks towards me. “Do not go looking for her.”

“What? I’m not going to let her stay missing; I’m going to look for her.”

“You’re going to get desperate and get new, worse ideas,” he stared intently. “First you’re searching for her, then you find where she is. You think she can be her knight, so you go to save her yourself. Then you get your arm mauled off. Each new idea seems genius, but it’s more idiotic and dangerous than the last. I know from experience.”

“You’re just being paranoid again!” I clenched my fists. “You think everyone is a danger to the family, you’ve always been like this!”

“I’m not being paranoid, I’m being cautious. I can’t trust anyone!” I’ve always noticed how similar Beau sounded to him. That’s why I hate and pity her paranoia with a passion.

“No, you aren’t, not every beast is going after you! Searching for her isn’t going to put me in danger. I’m going to look for her, I don’t know what could happen if we just sit around!”

“Female teenagers run away all the time!”

“Why would she?”

“Maybe she had a fight with her father, or perhaps with you,” because it’s always his dumb son’s fault…

I glare at him. He’s always treated me like I’m just a dumb dog. That someone is always after him, but we’ve never been ‘attacked’ before. I’m sick of my life being controlled by another beast’s paranoia!

He just sighs.

“Did you act like this when you were my age?”

“No. I wasn’t afraid of anything. I wanted to be feared because that’s how I thought a male wolf should be. It caused me to get with bad beasts, hurting other beasts, getting myself hurt… I watched beasts die and got my life spared by the beast I mauled to near death. I don’t want my son to go through something like that.”

“Why would something like that happen to me?”

“It may seem impossible, but it’s not. It started with me going to a bar, I met a beast, then I was getting shot at. Every idea is more dangerous than the last. Please listen to me, Duko. I love you.”

My father doesn’t say he loves me all that much. He says he only wants to say it when he really means it.

“I know how afraid you are about this, but I’m terrified. Beau is someone I care so much about, I hold her so dear to my heart. I need to find her. She’s probably praying for it right now.”

***

I walked on the sidewalk, shivering as the snow began to fall. I’ve asked questions to every resident in my and Beau’s neighborhood. It’s been mostly ‘I don’t know who she is,’ or ' I didn’t see her that day.’ But those who did have something useful to say saw the same beast talking to her: the superintendent, Mr. Santifelon. He might not know much, but it’s worth trying…

I arrive at his house. It’s… depressing. All the blinds are closed, and the grass is uncut.

I knock on the door, the sound of numerous locks unlocking before I look up at his tall, intimidating figure. He looks at me with a deep glare.

“Hello, Mr. Santifelon,” I try to tread away from that harsh gaze of his. “A small female bear that’s a senior at Claws Academy went missing Friday night and I’ve been questioning people to help find her. Most beasts saw you talking to her first period. You came into the classroom and asked her to talk with you in an abrupt change. When she came back, she looked tired, even bothered…”

I read from my notes, trying not to sound accusing. This probably explains why she was so quiet when we met on the bus that afternoon. She’s always tired from school, but not quiet like that. It could’ve been about her coming to celebrate from me, but she would probably forget about it until it was brought up.

“I was talking to her about grades.”

“…Why? Isn’t your job to check if the school is in check, if the principal is doing his job, or something like that?”

“Mind your business.”

His harsh tone catches me off guard. He’s very defensive. He isn’t known to be bubbly or anything but it’s unusual.

I lower my ears in submission. “…I’m sorry. Did you at least see her after that..?—”

“I never saw her, I didn’t talk to her again, I just went home, that’s that.”

I have a bad feeling about him, but I don’t know what it is besides the harsh yelling. I just smell something so familiar…

I begin to walk away since this isn’t going anywhere talking to a hermit. “Thank you for talking to me.”

“Wait.”

I look back at him.

Duko

♧ 12 / 21 / 1980 ♧

Beau didn’t call me Friday night.

Every Friday night, it has become a tradition to call and talk with each other. We’ve done it since we were freshmen, and it isn’t like her to not do it.

Her father never let me over because he ‘didn’t want a male alone with his daughter.’ That may be true, but he just doesn’t trust me because I’m a wolf. The origin of her worries isn’t that unclear.

I’m worried about her. I need to check on her, face-to-face. Did she feel so guilty that she broke our routine? Or, worse, is she afraid to call me?

I said she was okay to feel like this, and it is, but it makes me feel like a monster. I try not to smile too big at herbivores. I try to hide my claws. But just existing makes a beast afraid.

I wish I were born a bear.

“Oh, hey, Duko,” Arion, a bearded collie that I talk with during lunch, greeted me. He seems… nervous. “I’m sorry for what happened.”

“For what… happened?”

“You didn’t hear? Know that tiny bear you’re always following?”

“She isn’t tiny,” I glare at him. Beasts always treat Beau like she’s a cub. She isn’t. She’s one of the greatest beasts I know.

“Yeah. She… uh… she’s been missing since Friday night.”

What?

I break off into a sprint, missing what else Arion said. She’s been missing? She would never just leave, she goes on about how beasts are going to murder her if she takes a step outside. This is now more about how she’s feeling, it’s about where she is.

I arrive at her house, banging on the door. He opens the door with a look of anticipation but looks disappointed when it’s just me.

“What do you want?” Mr. Spera asks, his tone indicating he wants nothing to do with me.

“I heard what happened; what do you know about her?!”

He sighs, a sad look in his eyes. “Friday night I went out for groceries, but it took me longer because of the snowstorm. When I came home, I couldn’t find her. Someone sprayed the kitchen floor with water. Because of the storm, there weren’t any footprints to track her down.”

“She wouldn’t just… run away.”

“Of course, she wouldn’t! She’s scared to death being outside alone.”

“Do you think someone took her?” I shiver at the thought. She can’t defend herself, so she couldn’t do anything if some sick beast wanted to kill her. I feel like a jerk for everything I said, always saying no beast would ever do a thing.

“That was my first thought. She probably didn’t lock the window. I wasn’t there to remind her, as I do every night…” He shudders. “She could be raped, devoured, sold to the black market, or some other sick thing I always told her would happen!”

I don’t say it, but I doubt someone would devour her. She’s a bear, it’s rare for predators to be victims. He’s just jumping to conclusions, as he always does.

“I’m going to help find her, we should go to the police and ask for help!” We need to. I’m sick to death about her. I don’t know what I would do if she never came back.

“They couldn’t do anything, her scent was drowned out because of the water. There aren’t any suspects.”

“I don’t care. I’m going to do anything I can to help find her.”

***

They’re supposed to protect and serve, but they’re doing a horrible job at it.

The police station had three officers in the office. Two dogs were busy smoking cigars, and the chief was a pig. They talk about her disappearance so casually, as if it’s nothing to worry about.

“All we can do is put her on a missing beasts’ list. With no scents, footprints, or suspects, we’re a bit stuck,” Chief Paunchy replied to our concerns. They’re apathetic to him.

“You could search the forest or question her neighborhood!” I argued. I don’t care how long that’d take.

“We did. There was a crowd when we arrived. no one saw her the night before, since no one went out because of the storm.”

The snowstorm carried on until ten at night. She was gone when Mr. Spera came home. She wouldn’t go outside in a storm like that. What beast would have such diligence in taking her in such weather?

And why?

“Despite that, you should do everything possible to find my daughter!” Mr. Spera raises his voice, slamming his fists on the table. “I’m not going sit here and accept that she’s gone until I’m granted some kind of miracle! You don’t have the fear of having your cub missing and not knowing if they’re alive or not…”

The intensity of the situation is hitting her father hard. He immediately jumps to conclusions, quickly falling apart. It’s beginning to rub on me too. What if she did run away, not wanting to see me again? What if she’s in some horrible life-or-death situation? What if she is dead?

…panicking isn’t going to do anything. I need to focus and calm myself. I can never accept that.

“Sorry. We’ll work on it, we don’t know if she ran away or got taken.”

“She wouldn’t run away!” It would be more helpful to explain why, but Beau would be embarrassed out of her mind.

“Alright, alright!” he says in an annoyed tone, sick of this discussion. “We’ll question beasts who knew her, the last ones she spoke to before she disappeared, you can help too if you want.”

I smile, my tail slightly swaying. We finally got through to them.

“We have a case with a gang full of cats that’s been going on for months so we’re occupied. We have more serious things to worry about.”

Beau

“Get in the bath.”

He closes the door, leaving me alone in the bathroom. The tub is filled with warm water, and he left new clothes on the toilet. Despite his mood, he added bubbles as if I was a cub. Maybe Soleda liked bubbles.

I put a paw in the water, feeling it dampen my fur and warm my freezing paw. Baths always calmed me down. The feeling of the water on my skin, my body warming up… it was just so relaxing. But it’s hard to relax when you’re in the same house with a lion that’s furious with you.

I undress and step into the bath, wincing at my frostnip. My pads have reddened and are painful when applied pressure. It hasn’t worsened to frostbite but is hell to deal with.

I stare at the ceiling, going deeper into the water. I failed. My one chance to free myself is gone. I don’t know what he will do to me, I fear he’ll hurt me.

The longer I stay here, the more my chance of freedom decreases. Leo will never change his mind about me. He wants to shape me ‘back’ into his beloved, molding me into a completely different identity. Making me forget who I am, who I was.

I can’t sit here and let that happen.

I jump out of the water, quickly drying and dressing myself. I open the door, getting out when seeing he isn’t there. I hurry to the window opening it and feeling the cruel cold. I don’t care if my frostbite turns permanent this time, I just need to get out here.

The sound of an aggravated growl fills my ears. The next thing I knew I was being roughly grabbed by my shoulders and turned around, faced with Leo’s seething expression, teeth bared.

He’s furious.

“You’re trying to escape again,” I try to run off, but he has a tightening hold on my wrist. “You could’ve froze to death, or suffocated yourself in that snow!”

“I’ve been so lonely without you, it’s been so hard living my life like this. You make me feel complete,” he lets out a shaky breath. “Yet this horrible thing has happened to you, making you forget all of your memories, every memory of us.”

“No, that isn’t—”

“Your father isn’t a rhino. You aren’t friends with a wolf. You don’t even go to Claws Academy. You went to Deer Valley,” his voice cracks. “I don’t know why this happened. Why did you leave me? Was I too clingy? Did you not like lions? Did you lose interest in me? Did you ever have interest in me?”

I’m the one being held by a violent, mentally unstable lion. But he is the one with tears wetting the fur on his face. He won’t break eye contact with me, looking deeply.

“I-I don’t know,” I try to reason. “I’m not her. I’m Beau Barrese, and I was never in a relationship with you. We’re nine years apart, it can’t be possible that we were in high school together…”

“We’re only two years apart…”

“No.”

“You’re Soleda Anstead, you could’ve been Soleda Santifelon…”

“No.”

“But you look so identical to her, you have to be her!”

“No! I am Beau Barrese, I never loved you nor knew you!”

He grabs my shoulders, his claws almost digging into my flesh as they protrude.

“I kidnapped a young, defenseless beast… my life is over, I’ll be seen as a pedophile. Oh, God.”

“It-It’ll be okay,” I lie, trying to calm him down. “I’m sure you won’t be accused of—”

“I need to get rid of you, I need to get rid of you. Every trace of you.”

My body freezes. My mind went into a complete state of panic, but I couldn’t move. All I see are his pupils constricting, his fangs baring and salivating. All he has to do is devour me, clean the blood, and bury my bones. Then I’ll just be another unsolved missing beast case. My father would never stop blaming himself.

He just looks at me with those wide, predatory eyes. Hesitating. Not lunging and biting my throat, killing me. He doesn’t want to do this. He thinks this is the only thing he can do to reverse his dreadful mistake, by committing a horrific act.

I spent every day of my life worrying about a fate like this. Always being told that it’s rare for someone to devour a bear and that all of my anxieties will leave me once I grow big. But they were wrong. I was right. I was right the whole time.

I don’t want to be right. I don’t want to die like this, I need to escape my fate. With everything that’s happened to me, I realize that my father’s words weren’t just worried ramblings.

“I pray this will never happen,” he began. “But to stop a sick beast from devouring you, you must calm them down. Look within. The largest beast always has the softest place inside their heart.”

I dread that I have to do this…

“I remember when we used to share tongues!”

He stops, his face going blank.

“Isn’t that what cats do with their loved ones..?”

“You… You were the only one who appreciated my felidae body. Not like my father who only liked my fangs, claws, and deep voice.”

I try to have the softest voice I can muster, to act like Soleda. “You’re deeply soft and sensitive, you only need love.”

“Oh… Oh, yes! I’m just a small kitten, like you used to call me…”

I want to rip my fur off. I have to act like this so I’m not eaten alive? God.

He lets go of my shoulders, handling my wrist like glass as he guides me to his bedroom. His room has clothes and other random objects scattered across the floor and bed. It looks nothing compared to the nicely cleaned room that I was kept in. It was like he made it just for me. How long has he been planning to keep me like this?

“I’m so glad you finally came to your senses, Soleda. We can finally be together again. You’ll be a Santifelon!”

I give him a smile, internally screaming.

He brings me into bed, bringing the covers over us. He brings his arms around my body, holding me so very tight, not any possible chance of letting go. He begins to lick my forehead. It isn’t as disgusting as I thought—it makes me feel like a cub again. It makes me feel as defenseless as a cub. Trapped in a house with someone who would kill you if you tried to leave.

The gentle lap of his tongue makes my eyes droop. I allow them to close, hoping to wake up to this all being a dream. But it’s something I can only fantasize about.