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ya know like….you always hear about the classics™ authors having stupid wild shenanigans with each other. they all banded together to be dumbass chaotic english majors together. the stories are great and they’re all considered timeless genius writers….we don’t have that with modern age authors? where’s the goddamn sense of community? where’s the saucy tales of jk rowling, stephen king, james patterson and nicholas sparks locked up in an orgy cabin during a hurricane and having a writing contest. no one’s ever gotten in a fist fight with stephanie meyer. rick riordan didn’t cry face down in george r r martin’s garden after no one liked blood of olympus. jodi picoult doesn’t have a single damn calcified heart in her possession. cassandra clare and suzanne collins never had sex on a grave. neil gaiman has never gone on a week long sex-binge that would have killed him if r l stine didn’t intervene. john green has never written a book in two weeks while snorting massive amounts of cocaine. where’s the drama!!! where’s the scandal!!!! where’s the intrigue!!! modern day authors have to step it UP a notch, God dammit.

The one exception to this is Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman.

i wanna be a dark souls npc who just laughs hysterically each time you talk to them then dies for no reason in a weird place

i wish you could download mods for movies. i want to watch the thing (1982) but with kurt russel in a baby slut t shirt and camo capris

[id: unfortunately, its kurt russel in the thing (1982) wearing a baby slut tshirt and camo capris.]

noone in this house appreciates anything i do

I will always reblog this.

please may i have some coochie

why you bake me