Here For A Good Time: 1st Attempt

We begin in 2J, where the guys are playing "Bio Hazard Battle Blast 5: Crotchy Returns." This must be a new addition to the series, since James references "Bio Hazard Blast 4: Rise of Crotchy" in BTTerror.

It doesn't appear that they're having all that much fun, though. Logan is annoyed that James keeps saying how much he loves the game; Carlos blows up the ammo Kendall was saving; Carlos is upset that Kendall got the platinum controller; and James betrays Logan.

Logan tackles James and Carlos, and the three of them are ready to beat the snot out of each other.

Kendall points out that they've been fighting constantly, and we get a montage of them (Logan, James, and Carlos) antagonizing each other for seemingly no reason. I guess Kendall is managing to stay out of the fray since he's the designated "only sane man" of the group and must fulfill that trope no matter what.

Side note: I like that we can see their usernames for their characters on the paused screen.

Kendall is "Slapshot", Logan is "Logan123", James is "DiamondBoy", and Carlos is "Carlitos42." Logan definitely got fed up with trying to think of a clever name and just went, "Ughhh, I don't care!! Logan123 it is. Whatever!"

James declares that he can't live like this anymore and says he's moving out. He even conveniently has his suitcase packed and ready to go. Logan does as well. This moment is funny.

Of all the ridiculous, impossible things that happen in this show, it's amusing when the characters occasionally take notice and question it.

Carlos also pulls out a bag, says he isn't going to miss any of them, and then the three of them attempt to fight their way to the door and are stopped again by Kendall, who tells them that they're all perfectly capable of spending 5 minutes together without fighting. It's immediately followed by this transition card:

We then see Logan, Carlos, and James angrily exiting the apartment with their bags. Logan's line of "I hate ALL OF YOU" as he runs into the hallway, swinging his suitcase, made me laugh.

They go down to the lobby to tell Mr. Bitters that they want their own apartments, and he tells them it'll be $7,002 each. They stare at Bitters a moment, then yell at each other and go their separate ways. A fancy-looking fellow arrives at the front desk, then, and tells Bitters he's taking a kayaking trip around the world, so he won't need his apartment anymore.

James pops up to snag the keys.

Love how the keychain is facing one way in the shot with Bitters and then the other way in the close-up. I would like a word with the script supervisor for this show, because the amount of times a very obvious difference isn't caught is insane.

We return to 2J, where Kendall is trying to put the apartment back together after it was destroyed by his fighting friends. Mrs. Knight and Katie enter, and Mrs. Knight is exasperated. She's apparently been telling the boys to go outside and play. Kendall points out that they can't play their video game outside, and he also assures her that they'll be fine.

He then collapses onto the couch the moment she leaves.

Katie "helps" by making things worse for her brother and tells him that he and the guys are starting to grow apart due to the intense pressures of Hollywood. Kendall doesn't buy it.

Kendall heads to Rocque Records, where Gustavo is stressing out over the BTR "All Over the World" tour that he and Kelly are trying to put together. Kendall explains the situation and asks Gustavo to yell at them so that they can be friends again.

Gustavo agrees, on account of not wanting the band to break up before their first world tour, and also because he just loves to yell. He throws the peel of the banana he's eating onto the floor, and Kelly tells him to pick it up before he slips on it and throws his back out. Gustavo scoffs and says that only happens in cartoons.

Now, you might be thinking, "Oh! He's going to slip on the peel for sure now that he's said that! BTR, after all, is a show based on cartoony principles!"

Well, that's what I was thinking, at least. Instead, Gustavo throws his back out simply bending down to pick the peel up. Way to subvert expectations, show.

Gustavo also can't yell now, so he whispers to Kendall that he has to fix things with the other guys himself. He also tells Kelly to call Doc Hollywood.

We go to Logan, who is hanging out poolside.

Kendall arrives and gets an absolutely insane greeting.

Logan, WHAT ON EARTH. By all accounts, Kendall hasn't been an active participant in any of the ridiculous fighting they've been doing, at least so far in the episode. Those instances all involved Logan, Carlos, and James, and they were the ones who were ready to beat each other up until Kendall intervened. I can only assume Logan is just so out of whack from all the nonsense that's been going on that Kendall is getting his residual irritation.

Logan then goes on to say that he's always wanted a place by the water because it's peaceful and doesn't have any of his "ex-friends." He gives a very pointed look to Kendall during that part, btw. It's just. It's so weird. Why is Logan so mad at Kendall?

I think that Kendall should have shoved Logan into the pool and just walked away, honestly.

Instead, Kendall apologizes for the way they've been fighting and asks what it'll take to get Logan to move back in. Logan says he wants Carlos and James to also apologize. Kendall runs off in search of Carlos after Logan tells him that Carlos has always wanted a place overlooking the park. He finds Carlos living in a little cardboard house.

Kendall tries to convince him to move back to 2J, but Carlos isn't easily swayed. He does, after all, have a view of the park, his own bathroom, and a modern kitchen, apparently. He refuses to apologize to Logan until James apologizes to him first. Kendall says that's impossible since no one knows where James is. Cue James in what is truly one of my favorite moments of the entire series.

When this episode came out, this moment was gif-ed a bajillion times and was everywhere.

I think that, after Kendall, James does the best "face-acting."

Kendall follows James to the apartment he's now staying in. It's a funky, 70s-style place, and James has already made himself quite at home.

His and Kendall's exchange of: "Whose place is this?!" "Does it matter?" "It might!" has always stuck with me. Both of their deliveries are so funny.

James tells Kendall about some of the perks of his new place, which include jazzy music that plays when he claps, hard candies that he doesn't have to share with anyone, and a new buddy he can chat to with the press of his Senior Alert button.

Of all the boys, I wouldn't have guessed James to be the one to fully embrace the life of a senior citizen. That seems like a lifestyle Logan would enjoy, but James is so perfect in this scene. Still, I can see Logan playing this role amazingly well.

Kendall is befuddled and exasperated and begs James to just apologize to Carlos so that Carlos will then apologize to Logan. Unfortunately, James will only apologize if Logan apologizes to him first.

We go briefly to Gustavo and his back problems, but that plotline isn't interesting, so I'm skipping it. When we return to Kendall, he's attempting to play all their roles in "Bio Hazard Battle Blast" by himself. He tells Katie that he misses the guys, but he's also happy because he gets the platinum controller all to himself.

Ridiculous.

Katie tells Kendall that he was too nice, and that he needs to employ some manipulation tactics to get his buddies back together. Kendall takes the advice and decides to try Fixing Things By Lying.

He goes to Logan's poolside cabana (which now has a lawn??) and tells him that Carlos is going to make him a special lunch to apologize. He then goes to Carlos's cardboard abode and tells him that James is making him an apology lunch. Last, he tells James that Logan is making him lunch. Kendall also emphasizes everyone's pride in an attempt to get them all to avoid bringing up the apologies at all.

Cut to the boys and Katie all having an incredibly awkward lunch.

Logan with his gigantic tower of toast. I like how that's dropped in there out of nowhere. "You know how much I love toast."

Has Logan expressed an affinity for toast in any past episodes? Or is this new Logan Lore?

Kendall points out how it's been more than five minutes, and they haven't fought once. To commemorate their friendship being successfully mended, Kendall proposes they play some "Bio Hazard Blast."

We get the "nine seconds later" card again and cut to Carlos, James, and Logan all fighting. Carlos has Logan's laptop, James has Carlos's helmet, Logan has James's comb, and none of them will return the items to their rightful owners. In fact, Logan does this

Licking the comb is so insane. That has been in James's HAIR. That is so disgusting.

This is another one of those moments that really makes me notice how far the guys have strayed from their pilot episode selves. Because BTAudition Logan would never. He would have passed out or puked at the thought of licking a comb.

Anyway, the guys apparently took a moment to tie Kendall and Katie up before fighting.

I believe this is Kendall's third time being tied to a chair so far in the series. He and Logan were tied up in BTJobs, then there was their kidnapping in BTConcert, and now this. How long have they been in LA at this point? Like, a year and a half, maybe a little more? And to end up in situations where you get tied to a chair three separate times in less than two years is wild.

Oh man, now I'm thinking about that BTR fanfic I read when I was younger where Kendall gets kidnapped that I could only ever read once because it was so messed up.

Enraged, the boys storm off, back to their various new homes. Kendall laments to his mom and Katie "I don't know why we're fighting so much", and I must once again point out that Kendall is NOT PART OF THIS.

We just saw, yet again, that it's always between James, Carlos, and Logan. Poor Kendall is running himself ragged trying to fix the rapidly fracturing relationships and yet still uses "we're fighting" as if he has anything to do with it. Poor guy.

Also! This is not related to the actual episode, but I've been noticing that Kendall sounds like he had a cold while they were filming this episode. He sounds congested, and his voice is a tad off. When he says words that end in "-ing", you can really hear it.

Anywho, Katie again tells him that he and the guys are growing apart. She starts to give statistics on the phenomenon but is rightfully stopped by Mama Knight.

Mrs. Knight tries to talk her son into using love instead of manipulation, and she's briefly hopeful that Kendall is taking her advice to heart until he applies it to the silly video game they all love. He says he's going to create a fake gaming tournament to lure them all together.

I'm still mostly skipping Gustavo's plotline because not much is happening there, but his line, "What about Switzerland? They like everything," as he and Kelly are still trying to put the tour together is hysterical.

Kendall sends out the flyers for the Battle Blast tournament, and we see him and Katie standing around and watching the clock later on. He'd told them to be there by 3, and it's 3:05, so he assumes they aren't coming.

Two things:

Katie assuring Kendall that she's going to take him to the mall tomorrow for new friends is so funny and also sweet. She is such a ride or die for her big brother.

I truly do not understand how time works in the BTR universe. Everything in this episode so far has taken place in just one morning and afternoon?? How did they have time for all of this nonsense to unfold?! Playing their video game, the initial fight, moving out and all finding new places to live, Kendall going to Rocque Records to ask Gustavo for help, then Kendall tracking the guys down and going back and forth between them, him going back to 2J to play more video games alone, manipulating them all into meeting for lunch, the other big fight, him making the flyers and delivering them to each of their new "homes," and it's only 3pm???

Not to mention the fact that we get a scene where Logan emerges from his cabana yawning and in a robe, which I assumed meant it was the following morning, but then he and everyone else are in the same clothes. Maybe he was just taking a nap?? I wish I could be one third as productive in an entire day as the BTR guys are in the span of just a handful of hours.

James, Carlos, and Logan stumble into the crib, already fighting, and Kendall reveals that the tournament prize is their friendship. He then delivers a speech where he reminds each of them about the ways they've been there for each other. His points include: Logan tutoring Carlos every night when he was struggling in Algebra, James defending Logan against the wrestling team when he insulted them in Latin, and Carlos running two miles to get James more hair gel when he ran out during the 6th grade dance.

These are all very sweet, but that last one especially gets to me. It is so incredibly Carlos. He would run clear across the country for James if needed. I love their friendship. (Even though I think James sometimes doesn't deserve a friend as devoted as Carlos, but that's another thing)

The guys each return the items they'd been holding onto. Everyone except for Logan accepts the things happily.

With everything fixed, Kendall happily suggests that they play some "Bio Hazard Battle Blast 5", which immediately sets the other guys into fight mode again. As they yell and wrestle with each other, Kendall puts the pieces of the puzzle together and realizes that it's the game making them fight.

We then go into the same initial flashbacks of the fights we had seen earlier in the episode, but this time with more context surrounding the game setting each instance off. Also, I'm just realizing that Kendall is included in ONE of the flashbacks where James gets tackled. I hadn't even seen him that first time. I still stand by my assertion that he's largely innocent in terms of all this fighting and has been the one trying to stop it. He's allowed a pass to tackle James once. As a treat.

Mrs. Knight walks in, sees the guys still seemingly fighting, and threatens to take the game away from them. They hand it over without protest.

Gustavo and Kelly arrive to tell the guys about the world tour and that they need to start rehearsing now. We then go to them performing "All Over Again" out by the pool.

And while they perform, we get some very clear indication of relationship pairing. Camille directs a hand-heart Logan's way, Kendall and Lucy point at each other, 3 random girls hold up signs for James (I'm assuming we can disregard them since relationships never work long-term for James, and I don't recognize any of them), and Jennifer 3 (as she's apparently called according to IMDB) waves at Carlos. I now have a vague memory of him being with a Jennifer, but I can't remember if it actually goes anywhere.

This is a very funny episode. It'd probably make my ranking of top S2 episodes, and there were so many scenes and lines that had stood out to me as ones I remembered from originally watching it. It was also nice that this was a fairly heavy Kendall & Katie episode. Always nice to see them together.

I also can't help but think of how interesting it would have been if the one having to solve their constant bickering was anyone but Kendall. I know that he "had" to be the one to fix it because that's his job as the designated leader and all, but it would have been nice to give him a break from that role every so often and see one of the other guys step up. Picture it: Kendall being more prominently in the fray and getting fed up enough to decide he wants out of 2J. I actually especially like the idea of Carlos being put in Kendall's role and being the one scrambling to patch their friendship back up. I think it would fit his character really well, in fact! Sweet, sensitive Carlos running around, desperate to fix whatever is broken with his buddies is so in line with who he is. And it would have allowed Kendall to appear a little more innately human rather than just serving as the guy whose entire focus of his life is managing everybody else's lives.

Idk. Just something that's fun to consider.

Kendall pep talks: two