"Remember when they told us every computer was going to crash on 1/1/01 and there would be chaos and then nothing happened?"

I was working as a contact tracer during the pandemic. I was in a supervisor position, so I'd be on calls with the Illinois Department of Public Health (IDPH), who would relay to us what the CDC's current guidance was. And when the 5 Day Isolation thing came out, all of us asked "but is it safe? Is there any guidance that suggests people are less likely to infect others?" Their answer was "no, but businesses need workers, and this is about people getting back to work faster."

"baptise me in hot dog water"

Hot dog water - there's a Tumblr post out there I've seen saying hot dog water is the opposite of holy water, due to the fact that a single drop of it will contaminate what it touches. I assume this was partly inspired by this allusion but who knows for sure.

Also the the idea of holy water as inhuman and cleaning vs hot dog water as the remains of feeding someone - often a child - and entirely human. It may be dirty and I do not want it on me but God hot dog water has some memories. You will not wash away my sins. They're mine. Also, anyone can make hot dog water but holy water is refined, restricted (yes anyone can make it in an emergency but lay people are restricted from it)

"you and I both know"

Unlike baptism for babies, this one is done between two people who are both aware of what is happening. The one receiving the baptism gives the orders about what they want to happen. The giver and receiver are portrayed as equals. They are equally aware of their humanity.

"the holy stuff won't take"

Ooof heartbreaking, amazing line. Raises so many questions. What does it mean when the water "takes"? What has the receiver done that makes them unfit for holy water? Or, what has the holy water done that makes it to weak to help, to be a part of your life?