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sometimes I have to stop myself from posting shit like "who made replacing a bike chain so erotic" because I remember the number of people who see my posts and I have to take a step back and reconsider my choices. sometimes I have to hide my true and sincere thoughts in a post about how I'm not posting them because it is funnier this way

whatever. it's just reaching between all its delicate parts to wrench out its guts with lots of sweating and straining. while it's upside down and immobilised. and then it's just taking the slick and shiny new chain and feeding it gently through gears and between metal before pulling it taut until the derailleur is extended and the chain clicks into place and can no longer be removed. I; think I'm bicycle. I mean bisexual

You make soup in a big bowl. You serve it in a smaller bowl. And then you convey it, using a spoon, to your mouth. But what is the spoon? Simply a smaller bowl still

i would fuck him [remembers im talking about a real person] um [remembers its normal to be attracted to people] i would fuck him

the world is a strange and wonderous place

every ad on tumblr these days is for meet n fuck island 17 or some insane chat ai that cries

both 30 years old, born on the same day at precisely the same millisecond, but she was born in the state of Arizona which does not observe daylight savings time so one could possibly make the (weak) argument that she's an hour older. problematic age gap?

alright alright how about this other chick. she was born orbiting a black hole and due to relativistic effects currently unexplained by established models we are both 14 million years younger than eachother. help me with the ethics of this

Theyre called draculas because they drank u. La

Did anyone else hear just one single angelic note

the angelic note is playing at your dashboards resonant frequency. shaking its miserable posts apart