rotten peach

This is an opportunity. If you waste it, you'll end up here again, all alone.

“Jian. I wanted to show you the sea.”

After this December, we’ll get into the second year of our relationship. The butterflies are gone, but they’ve been replaced by something else. I can’t really explain what it is, but at such moments, I always catch myself saying, “Gosh, you (으이구)”.

Thom Yorke by Koh Hasebe

i always thought the choice was mine and i was right, but I just chose wrong i start the day lying and end with the truth that i’m dying for the knife

“Paula was long past their sophomoric treacle, writhing nest of hairpin stockings and formal gowns. The names they called her penetrated intact through her closed door… creepy, loner, disturbed. It didn’t concern her because when she first came to the school, the bad… the bad thing happened. She was so frightened, and she didn’t have any friends and she never supposed she would want… She never supposed she would need anyone. But now that she had found… that she had found a friend… she felt the old fear leaching back.”

And there will be moments of relief, in her and in you. Moments that feel so normal, and calm, and rewarding that you’ll find yourself praying they last forever. Even though she’s only a child, and all the hard parts have yet to even come. And at the age of 16, she’ll overdose, spend four days in a coma, and you won’t know if she’ll live or die. But when she wakes up, she’ll be given the opportunity to get clean, to become a different person, a better person. Here’s the toughest part. No matter what you say, or do, or wish, the decision will be all hers. And all you can do is hope she gives herself the chance that she deserves.