How does one bio?

I think boys should purr

Hit the right button and they do

it's called the prostate

But y’all not ready for THAT conversation

Yrahrabbrabyababrabow? Yabayayayow. *Click click click click click click click click click click click*

i love you spinach i love you mushroom i love you garlic i love you onion

everyone who reblogs this post saying they hate mushrooms youre ugly youre disgusting im gonna kill you give me $200

Ok so the thing about reading like books which are “predictable” is that I, a story enjoyer, go completely bonkers about it bc its like Enrichment in my Enclosure. A scene parallels another earlier scene between different characters thus serving to highlight the differences in their views and priorities???? A line makes me think “hmmm I bet that’s gonna be relevant later” ends up being relevant later????? I am a tiger chewing ice cubes out of a pumpkin. I’m so so happy. Please foreshadow more things. Throw the completely anticipateable plot beats at me like catnip mousies!!!!!

*twirls strand of hair around my finger* hes just soooo (starts describing the absolute worst man in the history of the world)

Oh noooooooo! The mystery is solved! You’ve solved my final riddle, you are ze new riddle master... Congratulations… You have proven yourselves... quite the adventurers... oh, I’ve landed on Bryan- Bryan, ahhh… Bryan, I’m so proud of zem… I’m going to die now... My life is flagging from my body... I’ll see my family... goodbye cruel worrrrld-

I literally have no context for this and it’s fucking me up.

if im careful i could whittle this peanut into sonic

Every once in a while Tumblr just falls over and starts convulsing and its entire user base just kinda. stares at it disapprovingly for a bit.

we'll sometimes poke it with a stick, too...

Reblog to poke Tumblr with a stick

Every time I post is me poking tumblr with a stick

Y'all ever just suddenly have the overwhelming urge to swim??? Like not actively but you just wanna,,, be in the water and have some Peace

That’s carcinization working it’s magic

I am a WHORE for “the love is requited, they’re both just idiots”

“They are STUPIDLY competent at EVERYTHING except each other.”

"they/them pussy" this "they/them pussy" that. you couldn't handle they/them dick but nobody wants to talk about that

my name has been stolen

why don’t you shut your fucking mouth and look at the wikipedia page for sucking cock???????????

alright one sec

hey it says i gotta have my mouth open for this one boss