dreamwriter

I love animala so much!

I was like i want that kind of love that transcends space and time

Wait i had it

Not romantic but i love my cat

But it hurts

Several bad things happened in November 2024

And actually back to January 2024

Grandma died march 2024

My fishel died

Some dogs i liked died

One hit after the pther

Felt so good to be at my aunts in September, break from running around all summer

But not same respite spring 2025... i felt bad

Lymes? I hD a tick

Things building up?

Premenopause?

Eddwcrs of anri anxiety pill?

Then i hit my hesd

So.. is there sth else complicating this

Or perhaps a mercy in some way since i am removed a bit from the world, cushioned, separate... i wouldn't be able to bear the full force of it

I have to take breaks as it is... from the news, from media.... alot less than i could bear even before (not to mention needing break from screens bc light sensitivity)

Perhaps these 4 years too much for me, heading to 2....

Will it get worse later?

I don't want to be out of commission for 4 years....

Perhaps the world will be too much for me from now on

Or i have to find a way to deal w it

How when health issues so stressful? Brain power reduced :( ability yo dwal w things reduced

Gain character and all that.... slowly, agonizingly.....

Perhaps both psycjosomatic and a mercy

Perhaps neither

Maybe i need to make my own meaning

Somehow

A lot less than many have to deal w

But it seems very hard... where is the light

How can i face the world

Hard even before

Now insulated but can't last forever

Can i comeout of this stronger somehow

Face and deal w the world