Everyone deserves to dream...

whatever. go my scallops

last night I had the experience of "referencing a tumblr post that you think is widely known but turns out to not be as widely known as you thought it was" last night and it was this post. whatever. go my scallops

they’re foreclosing on my mind palace

i know the way people talk about their pets now is probably how we’ve been doing it for all of history. a cat owner in ancient rome saw their cat lounging on the dining pillows and commented “he thinks himself to be the senator claudius 🤣”

which one lies and which one tells the truth

followers of mine dont even bother clicking. it is what you think it is. your sharingan never fails

Shut the hell up Sasuke

I just felt someone Z-target me

[clearly circle-strafing you] don't be ridiculous

we joke about the cubus in amaurot but honestly if a new yorker made a simulacrum of new york 10,000 years in the future and someone was like "why are there fucking rats" they Would react like that one tweet

logging onto woundblr and seeing all the pain on my gashboard

Wile E. Coyote, two milliseconds before he lights a match only to reveal he's surrounded by flammable traps he himself has set and the whole website explodes

its probably a normal sign for the economy that all of my adulthood fantasies are like "imagine having your own kitchen living room and bathroom to decorate" "what if i could get on a train" "maybe one day i could purchase a sturdy pair of shoes" "i should save and invest in a single bicycle"