horny for monsters? look no further.

Just some minor rules I need to lay down first.

If you are a minor, you have been warned. This blog will have gore and NSFW and if you view it, it’s your own fault if you get scarred.

I will do NSFW, but no hardcore stuff.

I will NOT write rape, pedophilia, incest, etc.

I will write polyships, platonic ships, LGBT ships, etc.

All reader inserts will be gender and appearance neutral unless the ask specifies. For example, if you want to see something with a black female reader, then specify you would like one. This is so everyone can feel like they’re included in the fun!

CHARACTERS I WRITE FOR

All the monsters in the Crypt Monster Universe, such as The Look-See, Aponi, The Birch, etc. All monsters are on the table, but specify which ones you want.

Honestly? Not really.

This isn't to say that I don't think they wouldn't work as a couple -- it's just that I'm not really into SFC. Maybe it's the lack of monsters, maybe it just feels too much like the generic tv dramas that I come to Crypt to get away from. Plus, there were so many open ends left by the time the series ended that it kind of...made me mad? Like, what happened to Karen and Jaina and Allie Ann and everyone else? It felt like they just ceased to exist for Season 3 and everything was focused on Roger.

My own hangups aside, I do think Taylor and Jaina would be a cute couple. Jaina helps Taylor come out of her shell a lot, and while it doesn't always turn out well it's good for Taylor. Jaina is probably the more outwardly-volatile one and people would never guess that Taylor's the one they have to watchout for.

I’m starting to get back into the Crypt fandom, and I have a few little thjngamabibs to update you guys on. A friendly reminds that I am not affiliated with Crypt TV and this is all that I know from the server and convos with my fellow server admins.

So the Monster Fight Club project was cancelled, but a new project involving Scamp took its place. The free mint was on Halloween of this year, and it’s been going way better than I expected it to. People are having fun with their Scamps and such, but there are a lot of crypto people on the Crypt Discord that are uh…unsatisfied with how Crypt is doing things. I mean, I’m probably biased, but it feels to me like they shouldn’t be this upset when it’s the first web3 thing that a web2 company has ever done.

A hacker got into the Crypt Discord and pretty much did a mass purge of all the channels and users they could before they could be stopped. The server’s still rebuilding and it pissed a lot of people off.

There’s another Crypt NFT collection that is NOT free, and it’s going to be releasing 6666 NFTs. I don’t know any other details, I’m just relaying what i remember. I still don’t support NFTs.

I do too, honestly. Thankfully, production seems to have stopped because of the recent fall in crypto stocks, but we now also have a full-length movie to look forward to!!!

Yeah. I know. I was there for the announcement.

I’m also an admin on their discord server and got to watch the uproar firsthand. So that was extremely draining.

I also happen to know through a firsthand account that making NFTs was not Crypt’s first choice. YouTube has supremely fucked them over - age-restricting videos, demonetizing the channel, etc. - to the point where they aren’t making enough money to actually pay their employees. They didn’t make any money from the Peacock series, either - because Peacock only paid them just enough to cover the costs of making the series. Crypt is dedicated to bringing us horror content at no cost to us, but they can’t make their videos for free, nor can their employees work for free. They explored tons of other options before deciding that NFTs were the way to go. It sucks, but that’s what happened.

https://twitter.com/crypttv/status/1494771859304312835?s=21

Alyssa Onofreo, the staff member running the discord, has also been extremely cognizant about the backlash, too. She’s come out multiple times and said that she understands the negative press behind NFTs and doesn’t expect us fans to treat this project as something from on high. And AFAIK, the project will contain NFTs made specifically by Crypt TV, so at the very least no art theft is going to be committed.

And for people saying “Well just make a Patreon!” — I have done the research because I wanted to make my own Patreon for my main blog a while back, and a Patreon wouldn’t necessarily help them. Patreon REQUIRES you to churn out content monthly, and with Crypt’s schedule and then preparing for their upcoming feature film, they probably wouldn’t be able to meet that schedule. And not to mention, Patreon takes a little Patreon tax of whatever income you make every month depending on the plan you choose. Crypt TV would obviously need to use the business plan, which takes a 12% cut of the income.

So let’s say in this scenario Crypt TV makes $1000 on their Patreon every month. That’s amazing! however, Patreon takes a 12% cut of that $1000. So in the end, Crypt TV doesn’t get the whole amount — they get $880. That isn’t going to be enough to pay all of their employees a decent wage and get their fans quality monster content for FREE.

I'm gonna be hella honest with you this isn't even my main account.

I have been neglecting this blog severely.

(Romantic) Look-See x Reader x Soot headcanons

TWs: minor spoilers for Look-See VS Soot

I definitely believe due to their respective career paths, Soot and Look-See’s paths are going to intersect at some point. One person isn’t supposed to have survived a bad rock-climbing accident, and they harbor guilt that they survived that they can’t let go of. But, of course, Soot and Look-See can be reasonable gents. Hell, in the creepypasta they were pitted against each other in, they teamed up to take out the narrator.

I feel like Look-See and Soot would end up playing "bad cop, good cop" respectively in the relationship. Look-See is obviously the more outgoing monster, so he'd be much more open to doing a lot more "date stuff". Soot is much more rigid and can’t just disguise himself with a wig and Groucho glasses, would probably need to be coaxed into doing some of the things that Look-See wants. Of course, the two get into spats, and you will need to break them up before things get physical.

One thing that they both agree on is that they both want to sleep with you. In your bed. In spite of not requiring sleep. It’s like extended snuggies for them. And when you all started dating, you probably didn’t have a bed big enough for the three of you. So what did Look-See do? Resort to grave robbery to help get you some more money! …yeah, that was not a good thing to do, so until you get enough cashiche to get a bed big enough for all three of you, your monster bfs sleep in shifts: Look-See one night, Soot the other. Hey — with this system going, you have monster protection every night. And in a world where you can literally be murdered in your sleep by a beastie at any time, they’ve helped you sleep more soundly than you ever have in your life.

Remember how I said Soot likes board games? He sis a big stickler for following the rules of the game and will not like it if someone tries to pull a fast one on him. Well, Look-See likes to cheat at board games, much like he likes to toy with his victims. Soot does not tolerate any of his nonsense. And that’s how a simple game like Candy Land gains the tense atmosphere of Monopoly. Oh, and Monopoly has been banned from the house after an unfortunate incident in which one of them got the fucking board lodged into the wall.

Look-See likes to spread his scent on you by snuggling you, wearing your jackets (the ones that fit him, anyway), and of course, laying on things that you like to sit/lay on. Soot, being a more civilized monster, does not do this as he doesn’t have those bestial impulses. He once walked in on Look-See rolling around in your bed and had no idea what he was looking at.

How about a mordeo who falls for someone but show their affection different than the mordeo queen since they are more feral?

Oooh, yes! I’d love to!

Just a friendly reminder tho, the inbox is closed while I try to catch up on requests.

(Romantic) The Mordeo/reader headcanons

It’s one thing for The Queen to become attached to a human. She’s not entirely driven by hunger, so she can distinguish between different emotions. It’s another thing entirely when a drone Mordeo finds a human they think is worth keeping alive.

The other Mordeo will not be as easy to keep away from you as they are with The Queen’s human. They don’t see you as someone else’s mate — they see you as leftovers. You’ll have a hell of a time trying to avoid them, and if the Queen finds out about you and your partner, your partner may unfortunately be exiled. Because of this, I would not recommend a cabin in the woods to stay close to your partner — maybe have a few neighbors within a short running distance and have your backyard facing the woods.

It’s very odd, but you’ve somehow been able to distinguish which howl is your partner’s. Maybe it’s because they do a more subdued version of it around you when they’re happy — it’s like a small bellow when you two snuggle or go on runs. I also imagine that Mordeos purr, because purring monsters make my brain happy and just…come on, who wouldn’t like a Mordeo laying in their lap and purring away?

As happy and carefree as your Mordeo might be when you’re together, that all goes out the window when you both are in the woods. Every twig snapping is another Mordeo stalking you, and they will not lower their haunches until you’re back safe in your house. Your neighbors will occasionally mention seeing a weird deer thing prowling near the houses, but you just smile and nod along and pretend you know nothing. Can’t have the government coming after the bae. No-no. That’s not happening.