Crowley’s Pockets

He's God, isn't he? Part of the "triune godhead." Then we could have gotten a completely different version of the scene in the bookshop, one where Jesus defends the world he knows and the people he's met and the things he learned (in his short time back on Earth) about love and generosity and helping people become better people. 

Maybe Aziraphale and Crowley ask him to create a world without angels and demons. Maybe he says, but aren't they people too? Can't they learn about love, and generosity, and helping people become better people? Of course they can. Look at the two of you.

And we could have gotten a beautiful mirror to the end of Season 1, where Christ does the same exact thing as the Antichrist, where he doesn't destroy the world but puts it back just the way it was. Even slightly better. 

AND OF PEACE THERE WILL BE NO END (18K; Rated M)

Aziraphale really loves Christmas, and after the world didn't end, he wants to make it a little more special for the people he cares about, especially a certain demon.

***

Ineffable Advent Calendar (series) by whatkeepsusalive

A series of 24 fluffy one-shots every day until Christmas. Since I'm posting this before the whole series is done, I don't have a word count to list, but if you subscribe to the series, you'll get emails for every one. So far they've all been human AU, though I don't know if that's going to always be the case.

***

Group Chat: Flat 3B 🐍📚 (32K; Rated T) by whatkeepsusalive

Human AU. Told partly through text messages. The bickering (and bickerflirting) is top notch. If you were waiting for this one to complete, it's done now.

Aziraphale likes his tea hot, his routines quiet, and his flatmate reasonably sensible. Unfortunately, he lives with Crowley,a sunglasses-wearing menace who sings Queen in the shower, sets pastry on fire for fun, and keeps stealing his clothes. They’re definitely not flirting. Definitely not falling in love. Just… mutually annoying. With benefits. Emotional ones. Probably.

***

The Demon's Tutor (59K; Rated T) by @silvormoon

Fantasy AU. Low angst and with some nice uses of some of the side characters.

Victorian Flower language : Pair Hawthorn with Camellia to indicate hope that a lost love will return

Been really into Floriography and I thought it would be an intresting concept if Crowley and Aziraphale ever used it to communicate under hell and heaven's radar (I will probably do more with this in the future)

chapter three: the nights were mainly made for saying things that you can’t say tomorrow day

fic summary:

Anthony Crowley doesn’t know many things. He knows he hates his job, he knows he hates consultants and pretentious professors trying to be heroes, he knows something’s wrong in the small town of Willow River: two sisters do not disappear on the same day, five years apart, just by chance. He knows whatever is going on here is not a coincidence.

Doctor Aziraphale Fell, consultant and pretentious professor, is just the last one of the many punishments the Universe has sent Crowley’s way, with his ever-changing eyes and infuriating wit. Reluctantly, he knows he has to accept Aziraphale’s help to bring the sisters home - and maybe, just maybe, something about Aziraphale is too magnetic for Crowley to ignore. Maybe, just maybe, he finds himself not willing to ignore it.

or: a five-year-long mystery looms over a small town in Oregon. A consultant and a Special Agent are not meant to fall in love in the middle of it, but they are not very good at following orders.

what you’ll find in chapter three:

Crowley tosses the cover away, his head hitting the wall behind the headboard as he sits up with a groan and a not-so-muffled, “Fuck.”

He should have expected this nightmare of a day to end with a heart attack, given how his week is going, but he still jumps out of his skin when he hears a surprisingly clear, “Hello there,” in response.

He doesn’t screech. Anthony Crowley has never screeched once in his life. “What the fuck?” he asks the darkness, calmly. “What the actual fuck?”

“Oh, I apologise. Have I scared you?”

I was recently reminded of the (adorable) fact that crows enjoy rolling down snowy hills, and since I like to headcanon that Crowley’s wings are crow wings…

Crow instincts: C’mon! :D  It’ll be fun! :D :D :D

Snake instincts: What the He— What on EARTH are you thinking!?!