No idiocy past this point, please

once you realize you don’t actually need to sleep, you can really (stops talking abruptly and stares straight ahead for 4 minutes)

Im not my blorbo's defence lawyer. I'm their rich mom at parent night and for the money I'm paying this place, my little darling treasure gets to bite as many classmates as they like

before pride month ends does anyone wanna admit they have a crush on me

posting this on the first day of june so you all have plenty of time to gather your nerves and whatnot

i’m like a clown that no one hired or pays

if I feel like absolutely torturing rocky then I sometimes like to imagine a scenario on erid where a few months into The Scurvy Era grace sits him down like "hey pal. there's a chance that the scientists here won't figure out how to meet my nutritional needs any time soon. I would love it if they can! but it might not happen. and I don't want to die very slowly and painfully of starvation. now listen to me. ideally I don't want to die at all. but more than that. I do not want to die. of starvation. I don't need anything from you to help with this, I can address it on my own, but if this becomes a real problem then I am going to solve it. Do You Understand What I Am Saying Right Now." and rocky isn't even allowed to immediately become evil about it.

EVERYONE STOP TELLING ME HOW OLD YOU WERE IN 2008 I DONT WANNA HEAR THAT SHIT

when you’re already in a bad mood and then you see a man with a stupid fucking mustache

this sucks so bad i need to [remembers suicide jokes only worsen my mental health] go join my friends on the barricade

Murder is scary bc a lot of video games are about doing murders, so if someone does murders irl then it could lead to them becoming a gamer. You're literally becoming desensitized to gaming when you do murders.