Fae Teletarchae

But now, after gaining some experience, I think I understand them better

Imagine you are deeply compassionate, or maybe just passionate about something. You see that it all can be ruined because people around you don't care, or they are actively ruin it because of stupidity, greed, just pure evil. You see everyone around you saying some bullshit and you know it is not true,and you know how harmful it is. You can't just walk away, you are dealing with constant trauma that just growing stronger and stronger, you can't deal with this bullshit anymore but you must, you know something other people don't know because they don't care, you are trying to insert yourself into society and play it rules, but when you hear or witness more of that bullshit you explode with anger. And then you just find stick to people like you and for everyone else you are just bunch of punks and rebels who are "angry for no reason" and it's all "because of the curse" and no one actually want to listen to you.

Your greatest curse is that your feelings and thoughts can be easily dismissed and despised because no one thinks you anger actually has a reason

For me now, brujah aren't just angry, they are at the first place sensitive to some topics and deeply care ===> they are overstimulated, frustrated and deeply traumatized===>it all turns into anger

Wanting something requires dopamine signaling, but liking something doesn’t.

If you have a mental illness/disorder that affects dopamine, you might feel that you don’t want to do the things that you like. You do still like them. You will appreciate having done them.

Let your likes guide you.

(If you want to read more, here’s one experimental paper about it. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5171207/ This theory called the incentive-sensitization theory was originally created to explain behaviors in addiction but can be applied elsewhere as well)

Now take this logic and apply it to things like ADHD, autism, clinical depression, and other less visible/divergent disabilities. You cannot think your way out of feeling.

sometimes the resource in question functions well in one city but has zero to offer anyone in any other location, for whatever reason, and very very often, when you DO find a real organization or lead or opportunity, they will have incredibly limited hours of operation, are not taking new clients and wont tell you when they are taking new clients, and/or have other means-testing that is simply infeasible to complete. i think on average i have to spend 1-10 hours on this timewasting shit to find one good lead for any sort of actual material result, and i am living in a DEEP blue liberal democrat metropolitan area.

we should all keep this in mind when we see fundraising posts on this website for people who are asking for food, medicine, or transportation money. the kneejerk response is to wonder why they simply havent gone to the foodbank. well, as a regular foodbank-goer who lives within walking distance of a food bank, let me tell you. it takes days to recover from a single trip there, and days to prepare for the next trip, due to all of the above. they only let you go once per week, so you have to carry as much as you possibly can back home, and you arent allowed to make multiple trips, and they wont let you take enough of anything other than dry beans to last more than a week anyway. so you cant make multiple trips per week, but you also cant stock up adequately to avoid running out of stuff like dairy and fruit in a couple days. if i was SLIGHTLY more disabled, or had kids, or had a normal job with normal job hours, it would be entirely impossible to go at all.

i could just lie to them and go multiple times a week anyway, and this would qualify as "welfare fraud". when you see accusations of "welfare fraud", keep this in mind also.

if you personally want to post a list of these resources, it behooves you to note for each one in you list whether you have personally used the resource or not, WHEN you did so, WHAT the result was, and WHERE you are located. if you cant vouch for it, go ahead and post the lead anyway, but say so. try to help people triage their list of leads

Second, to 3liza's point, most of the ways you can get food support assume that you have an absolute boatload of time, the ability to carry a lot however far you need to, and--for some fucking reason--that you're probably trying to "game the system" somehow.

(A wheelie carry-on bag can a useful thing for the "carrying a lot of stuff" problem, especially if it's a place that lets you take a lot of canned goods)

It is unfortunately also the case that foodbanks (at least in my experience) will check IDs to make sure you live in their service area! It fucking sucks! Especially because they very often WILL end up with food that still goes to waste a fair portion of the time.

Anyone who’s been my friend or a social media mutual this past decade knows exactly who Gandalf is and how much he means to me. I don’t call him The Wolf Who Brought Me Back to the World for nothin. I’m not exaggerating when I say that he saved my life when things were really f’n bad. That goes double for his incredible human parents, Kristine & Dave. By a sweet country mile, all three of them are among the most cherished chosen family I’ll ever have.

And… they’re all really going through it right now. Earlier this week, Gandalf broke his right hind leg and scans revealed (localized) bone cancer. It hasn’t spread yet so his prognosis is still quite good.

Gandalf has made it VERY clear to them that he is NOT ready to go. Not even close. So they are amputating the leg ASAP.

As quick as K&D are to show up for others in need of financial support, they both hail from a long lineage of proud, stoic Iowa farm folk and rarely ask for help. Even though Gandalf’s vet bills are already astronomical, they STILL aren’t asking for help!

Thankfully, they’ve consented to letting me set up a GoFundMe to cover some of Gandalf’s swiftly mounting medical costs. The way I see it, there’s no need for these giving, caring people to go into brutalizing debt in order to do right by their beloved family member.

Will you please consider helping me help some of my closest friends get through this? It would mean a lot if folks could boost this signal and share the link. Also, if you can (genuinely) spare a few bucks, that’d be great! A pile of $5 donations has a way of adding up quicker than you can say “Golden Eyed Dragon Leopard Wizard Dog Dandy Man Dinga Ding Dong Dangity #Gandalfpup Da Mandalf.” (Which is the manner of gibberish I’ve sung in this preshus babby’s face a thousand times, easy.)

Link to Gandalf’s GoFundMe: https://gofund.me/c012cfcaf

https://gofund.me/c012cfcaf