Captain Meow's Dumps

i am a child of the light

and i can see for miles

They are telling you this so that you will know to avoid doing the thing that hurt them in the future.

Imagine if it hurt them and they didn’t tell you. Then you’d just keep doing it, over and over, because you’d have no way of knowing it was hurting them unless they told you.

It isn’t better for your friends to suffer in silence. It isn’t better for them to start avoiding you because they’re being hurt and they don’t want to tell you. You don’t want your friends to be in pain.

They don’t want you in pain either!

They don’t want you to lash out at yourself, they don’t want you to hate yourself, they don’t want to watch you drag yourself through the mud. It hurts to see your friends suffer, which means it hurts them when you do that to yourself.

Putting them in the position of having to comfort you when they’re trying to communicate something that will improve your relationship is just going to make them not want to communicate when you do something that hurts them.

And you don’t want that. You want your friends to tell you when you hurt them, because the alternative is that they don’t.

Yes, it sucks to feel guilt and self directed anger when you make a mistake, but you can’t turn on yourself like that. It affects other people, and it’s not healthy for you, either.

Accidentally hurting someone doesn’t make you a bad person. It means you made a mistake, and you need to own that mistake. Apologize, and then work on not repeating it.

If you need to step away and collect yourself, that’s fine. If you need to have the conversation over text, there’s no harm in asking for that. Emotions are what they are, they get difficult to handle sometimes.