those ovis aren't gonna posit themselves @the-meat-machine - Tumblr Blog

i am going to keep writing stories about how much dirk loves to fuck puppets forever and no one can stop me

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calliyx

ok you must consider little baby jane running around with baby dirk and he is the WORST influence on her. let jane be a little devious

bold of you to assume to dirk is the worse influence

#homestuck #alpha dave #jane crocker #dirk strider #cuties

shelbycragg

it’s like nothing else we used to know

#homestuck #calliope

holy shit the polyswap gift i got is so fucking good!! it's about the lord english polycule (caliborn/gamzee/hal/equius). featuring lines that had me crying laughing and absolutely incredible insight into the characters and their relationships with each other. this is now the definitive take on what's going on in lord english's head to me. i will be thinking about this for a long, long time

here's the link: on the windows of the skull. i am begging everyone to read it

#fic recs #lord english polycule

homestuckpolyswap

POLYSWAP IS LIVE!

Go here for Derse!

Go here for Prospit!

Happy Polyswap everyone!

#YESSSSS IT'S HERE #go check it out! looks like a lot of great stuff there!#polyswap

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turntgh

crabby kitty

#homestuck #karkat

panicawa

Redglare & Mindfang sketch

#homestuck #redglare #mindfang

ceabu

FINAL GIRL KARKAT X MUDERER GIRL GAMZEE

gift for @thatsrightdollface <3

#homestuck #karkat #gamzee #gamkar

myzlwow

ive been busy but i am free now. yayy<3

#homestuck post-canon #del'fi #vriska #swiss elysi #tinnitusChakra #ultimate dirk #jade harley #beyond canon

thevaultlmao

I've been thinking about standard flavor DirkDave where Dirk is actually the inexperienced one. It makes sense in a way, after all Dirk probably had nothing but the Internet and his hand(and maybe some household objects, sex toys if he's really lucky), whereas Dave might have experienced way too much way too early. I think Dirk would have the theory down, he would understand what he's supposed to do and why, but the first time he and Dave have sex Dirk just feels so clunky and awkward compared to Dave who could probably do this stuff in his sleep.

Dirk trying to deepthroat Dave for the first time and gagging on it and having to pull back, Dave sliding his fingers into Dirk's hair so that Dave can guide him back down a little slower and get him into a better position. I think the thought of "maybe this is what Bro got out of it with me" would cross his mind at least once while teaching Dirk to actually have sex, and I think he would feel absolutely revolted at that feeling, at the fact that ok sure Dave's enjoyment is a thing of affection while Bro's was probably a thing of control, but it's still the same thought pattern. It's still enjoying watching someone under you struggle and fail to do the right thing, still enjoying putting a correction in place, still enjoying the obedience that follows. For all Dave knows, Bro could have thought it was a thing of affection too.

It's mostly a one-sided crash out. Dirk would certainly feel bad that he didn't actually have all of the strategies down, that his first time with Dave was a mess because Dave was just so much better at sex than Dirk was. However, Dirk doesn't have any serious morality issues attached to it, just a bit of self loathing at not having been prepared enough. I do think that that self loathing would cloud Dirk's understanding of the situation, though. I don't think Dirk would notice just how much Dave enjoyed teaching Dirk new tricks. I don't think Dirk noticing that would have really helped though, it would have tipped the issue in the other direction; Dirk would feel that he shouldn't have learned anything about sex, that he should have completely abstained from masturbation, that he should have let Dave teach him everything so that Dave could get the experience of teaching Dirk as many times as possible. (It's definitely a bit of his leftover complex with a!Dave. Dirk just still can't shake the mindset of wanting to be the perfect little brother for a!Dave, even though he's long since given up hope of ever meeting a!Dave.)

the-meat-machine

Anyone who likes this dynamic should read Room No. 9 by sasuke. Fantastic fic.

#homestuck #dirkdave #fic recs

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faygos

happy wriggling day karkat!!!! here is an illustration i did for the 2024/2025 sahcon zine waaaay back (like two summers ago haha). the zine is out now so i can share with you all! i highly recommend downloading the zine because @verdant-lobotany did a fantastic written companion piece for this illustration (also there are TONS of other amazing homestuck pieces in there!!! and each artist wrote about what homestuck means to them. check it out!!!).

#homestuck #all the trolls. all of them

welovehomestuckships

All Kids Quarterfinals

Bracket 3

Rose x Dave

Jade x Dave

Remaining time: 5 days 13 hours

No ship hate! <3

#polls

welovehomestuckships

All Kids Quarterfinals

Bracket 2

Dave x Dirk

Jake x Dirk

Remaining time: 5 days 10 hours

No ship hate! <3

#dirkdave my beloved 💞#polls

eggwishing

Various thingse from a magma

#homestuck #equius #nepeta #bro strider #lil cal #meowrails #brocal #bro is correct i think. but maybe he'll get lucky anyway <3

honeystuckandcake

I wish The Handmaid wasn’t so orientalist, the whole Japanese school girl thing + the fact she wears a qipao (Chinese) despite being primarily Japanese is soooo annoying to me

I drew her wearing a kimono, which is also silly but it’s more respectful I suppose

#homestuck #damara #doc scratch

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turntgh

your friend, john!

#homestuck #john egbert

cuddleslaughter

thank you for drawing bro strider :salute emoji:

your gratitude has been accepted the council's pride has increased by 70% since this was the very first ask, have some extra Bro

#homestuck #bro strider #lil cal #smuppets

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