quite. the. pickle.

always remember that the most important thing in life is to aroace headcanon all your favorites

Another reason why trains would be good is that most people are not good at driving

i've been phasing the phrase 'google it' out of my vocabulary and going back to 'look it up'. fuck you youve lost your generic trademark privileges

My edo period samurai roommate keeps telling me how i’ll bring shame and dishonor to our apartment if I keep forgetting to wash the dishes. Like whatever dude, I’m not the one carrying on a passionate yet illicit affair with the daimyo’s daughter whose hand has already been promised to another.

もう大名に「真に申し訳ございませんでした」と言いましたよ！と、お前は、我の浮気を公衆に明かさないと言いました！！

Bullshit dude last night I saw you texting O-Sumire haikus comparing her to the flower which gives her her name

you're just mad because you're hungry and tired and your legs hurt and you head hurts and you're too hot and you have depression

affirmations they will not kill me at work today. it is not in my job description to get killed. if they did kill me at work that would be weird and probably not worth it for them

Turns out the scheming eunuch's love for you is genuine

not a caller not a texter but a secret third thing