I will not hide this
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I will not hide this

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hot take in a roundabout way i think that's also why so many of us opt out of becoming parents ourselves
Does anybody know how to fix it
Start disappointing people and not backing out of it when they are upset, reject feeling ashamed of everything including of yourself, start saying No to things you do not want to do not just things you're scared of, do more of those things you're scared of but wish you could do, make your own plans and execute them, decide to do or not do something without basing it on who will Dislike it.
Free Will takes practice, and the chance of making someone somewhere Slightly or even Very Disappointed In You. But you're an adult and you can't be made to stand in a corner anymore.
John Brosio - Dinosaurs Eating CEO (2013) [2000 x 1833]
happy Mother’s Day to these two queens

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STOP IT UR KILLING HER
Hannibal + UNHhhh quotes (3,?)
Ugly Duckling sequel where the swan is like hey it's nobody's fault and I don't think anyone did anything wrong per se but nonetheless I did feel really alienated and depressed for most of my youth and those years do continue to affect me in the present day and their mom is like, so what you're saying is that you think I'm a failure and a bad duck.

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Person in the grocery store had amazon rainforest sounds blasting on their phone as they shopped and I think that's a beautiful use of free will
"people who don't wear headphones in public are a nuisance" except this one. I respect their indomitable human spirit
still thinking about when i saw a girl on here with ~3 partners and one of them was a lesbian with a “MEN DNI” banner and one of them was a tboy with a “‘MEN DNI’ DNI” banner
how am I supposed to live with the knowledge that the weird "A Mule Mom's Story" irish vanner horse embryo transfer cartoon on youtube was based on a real living vanner horse and real mules at a real farm, in Ocala, 30 minutes south of my house in my shrimp study area.
what do you mean a business literally selling frozen irish vanner horse semen on the internet inexplicably had a cartoon produced to advertise their semen sales and equine surrogacy, which I then bumped into on youtube in the 2010s while looking at artists' animation reels. what do you mean the real-life horse semen farm sits on top of the charred and terraformed remains of the ancient shrimp forest, which I have spent the last eight years painstakingly reconstructing from leftover scraps of wild space.
what do you mean I have to get up tomorrow knowing all of this now
before north central Florida was the "horse capital of the world", it was a rare ecosystem called Hydric Hammock, with networks of small temporary freshwater ponds under an oak and palmetto canopy. every year more and more of it gets converted into fancy horse people pasture (or buildings, but around Ocala it's mostly the former) and the temporary ponds are either filled in or made permanent and stocked with fish to control mosquitos. The heavy seasonal rain and limestone soil which once supported this ecosystem now grows lots of grass for horses. here is unconverted hydric hammock versus new pasture, on opposite sides of the same road near McIntosh:
this area is home to a number of rare plants and animals adapted to the semi-wetland conditions. I study fairy shrimp, which survive the dry periods as eggs and hatch in response to seasonal rain. they can survive drought and wildfire no problem, but cannot survive habitat modification. At least three species only live in central Florida, and one is potentially extinct. probably more species are hiding in other parts of the US south like Georgia and Alabama, but not a lot of people are looking for them, and obviously there's very little money in it.
Here is an adult Dendrocephalus proeliator, a central Florida endemic species which I co-described in 2019:
I've been burned too many times by the academia industry to want to risk finding an advisor and doing a thesis, like I am expected to. People can be cruel and I don't want any more bad experiences. So I do research entirely on my own as a hobby. For eight years I have been tracking the shrimp in whatever little pieces of semi-natural land have not yet been terraformed. maybe someday I will be able to do more, but for now I just document what I find.
anyway, that's what I mean by "ancient shrimp forest".
Opening 1 - Soul Eater
Happy October and Happy Rewatch Soul Eater Month to all who celebrate

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your own. personal. spongebob.
someone who can't breathe air.
someone who's square.
oh that's why this was on my sidewalk
my thing with veganism/vegetarianism is that i DO agree that large-scale meat industry produces a lot of cruelty and that boycotting it is a justifiable thing to do, but i fundamentally do not see a problem with the concept of eating meat.
the cow's not using the meat. if i don't eat it then a bunch of microbes will. or like... a dog.
not to be a redditor here but like... the nutrient cycle requires that someone break down that meat or the nutrients and energy are just going to be locked in this corpse indefinitely. someone's has to eat the meat, someone is going to eat the meat its just that bacteria and fungal hyphae and little maggots are all so small we perceive them eating as "decay". we are all a bunch of mammals running around breathing and shitting and shedding dander and the cow is already dead.
but also holy shit factory farms are evil