Grey

This was transformative media. I love it.

YO THIS WEBSITE IS WILD 

gets my dick out a full twenty steps before entering bathroom

No no, you don’t understand, moose really do get that big. Take it from a Canadian. I’ve seen that bullshit in person. Scary as all heck.

And that’s how people can die if they hit a moose. Seriously, one of our fears when driving in the country is having to deal with this scenario of a moose jumping out in front of the car.

I was dog sitting a dog once who insisted she had to go out in the middle of the night it was an emergency, so I took her out. Suddenly she starts pointing and barking and I look up and can just make out the outline of a HUGE moose. I’ve been accidentally face to face with a black bear and that scared me less than being up close with a moose. I’m 5 foot so imagine staring up at an animal several feet taller than you that is debating charging the dog who’s leash you are holding. I was terrified as I grabbed the dog by her collar to get better control over her and backed up slowly til I was out of line of sight and bolted for the house at a dead run. Did you know most Canadian lake monster stories come from people seeing moose swimming? They are massive animals.

They are massive and they charge. I get so scared when tourists are all “oh yeah, we got out of the car to get a closer look and, ya’ll have some mighty impressive animals around here.” Yes, yes we do, and they have mighty tired guardian angels because moose can, and do, charge at people.

Someone my mom worked with died hitting a moose on the highway. Their eyes don’t reflect light. In the dark they are literally nothing but a big slightly darker shape in the night. Roughly every year in the town I grew up in, a cow (moose) and her calf will wander through downtown. Maybe once or twice. If she’s aggressive enough, the local Mounties will escort her through to keep idiots away.

I have to admit I thought they were like a Canadian deer before this.

The commenter above who claims that moose’s eyes don’t reflect light is only partially correct; if you shine a flashlight in a moose’s eyes it will glow like a cat (and then you will probably get killed to death by an annoyed moose) but the reason they are so dangerous to cars at nights is that they are too tall for the headlights to reach. Think about that.

Moose confirmed for actual kaiju.

Now I kinda want a kaiju movie set in Canada where it’s just a moose. Like a regular moose but more aggressive.

@ssalogel

For scale, a female african elephant is 7.2-8.5 feet at the shoulder, according to Wikipedia. A moose is  4.6 – 6.9 ft. at the shoulder. So instead of thinking “This animal is a bit bigger than a deer” you can think “This animal is barely smaller than an elephant”

And they can run up to 40 miles per hour

A 16 wheeler with fur

I love when this post comes back

if I had a 450hp fan, this is exactly the sort of shit I would get up to

That feel when you’re Asian and your father with a bad leg was about to be sent off to surely die in a war for your great empire so you squared up both metaphorically and physically.

Why do you have to come for Mulan like this

It’s called contour sweetie

This was so satisfying 

i love taking the idea of “the serum gave steve better muscles and better senses” and just pushing it just that little bit into uncanny valley territory. he can see very slightly into the ultravioliet and infared spectra, moves/thinks quicker than normal people (hes conciously slowing himself down a LOT bc he knows it freaks people out) and is just. really strong. all of him is very strong. he can open a can of beans with a fingernail. 

superhuman as in “above and a little too the left of 100% human and not always in the good way”

The best thing is that of COURSE he wouldn’t realize!! He’s been colourblind for most of his life!!!!!

Pythagoras sounds like a real asshole.

he was

Fun fact: This cup uses an “S-trap” which functions very similarly to the way a modern toilet flushes. The S-trap of the modern toilet was not invented until 1775, which was 2275 years after Pythagoras died.  Humans used this idea to embarrass people at parties for more than two millennia before realizing it could also be used to better pipe shit out of their houses.