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wolfstar are the kind of couple who try to kiss and have a conversation simultaneously because thereâs never enough time for them to catch up after a long day, and thatâs why they always end up in bed clinging to each other, talking into each otherâs mouths while trying to make out or at least sneak occasional kisses between sentences
I am often plagued by the image of Sirius screaming and crying, overwhelmed by pain, anger and frustration and Remus holding him tight, murmuring âitâs okay sweetheart, youâre okayâ while Sirius is yelling at him and breaking down in his arms.
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Rating:Â Not Yet Rated
Warnings:Â none
Major tags:Â Epistolary, Canon Divergence, America, Road Trips, Sirius Black Needs A Hug, Muggle Culture, A Love Letter to the US East Coast
With October and all its fanfic prompt lists just around the corner, I, as a fan of oneshots, want to beg anyone posting to AO3 to please post your works individually and not cram the whole month into one big multichapter work.
Anthologies of short fics on AO3 cause huge obnoxious hurdles for anyone wanting to find or avoid works like yours, and also muck up the numbers for anyone doing a stats dive.
Anything real that someone might try to accomplish with an anthology can be better accomplished with a series or with tags.
Teal deer: I want to read your promptober fics. Post them as fics and not as fake chapters so I can find them and read them.
--
Here's the nitty gritty.
Anthologized works cannot be filtered for word or chapter counts:
I like to read fic under 5k, so I do this:
Someone else likes longfic, so they do this:
Only people who do NOT want to see oneshots will see your oneshots.
--
All tags on anthologies cannot be trusted and must be assumed to be inaccurate:
This is true of literally every tag on an anthology, including fandoms, ships, categories (m/m, f/f, etc.), and archive warnings.
I want to read Cleric Beast/Hunter vivisection fic. Someone else wants to read Cleric Beast/Hunter fic and is squicked out by vivisection. Your anthology features a Cleric Beast/Hunter coffee shop date fic and a Sam/Dean vivisection fic, and therefore carries both tags. I find a coffee shop fic I don't care to read, and the other person never finds the Cleric Beast/Hunter coffee shop date fic of their dreams because they're filtering out vivisection.
Mad lib that example with literally any combination of tags and it's the same. Only people who do not want to read the anthologized fics will find them.
(PS the tag for Cleric Beast/Hunter doesn't exist, I should get on that)
--
Anthologies throw false positives for crossovers:
According to AO3's search filter, a crossover is any work which carries tags for more than one distinct fandom.
In our example above, Bloodborne and SPN fics were anthologized together. Neither fic is a crossover, but the anthology will be removed from searches that exclude crossovers, and will spam the search results of anyone looking specifically for Bloodborne or SPN crossovers.
--
The ratings on anthologies cannot be trusted:
An anthology must be labeled for the highest rated fic it contains. If you anthologize porn without plot or ultra graphic vivisection in the same work as as tooth rotting fluff, the whole thing will have to be labelled as explicit (or unrated).
People looking for explicit work will find the the G rated fluff, people looking for G rated fluff will filter it out because it's erroneously labeled as explicit.
Only the people who do not want to read the work will find it. Are we noticing the pattern here?
--
To break the pattern a bit:
Individually posted short works belong on the archive.
Archive of Our Own is aptly named, it's an archive. It is designed to house fanworks, all fanworks, no matter how small, and the search function is designed to make those fanworks easy to find and sort. You are not "spamming" by archiving any quantity of correctly labeled archive materials.
If someone clicks on a tag and sees a front page full of your works and decides they hate you, they can just filter out your username or change the sort criteria. But chances are they'll go "sweet, twenty new works for the thing I searched for!"
--
Anthologies muck up the statistics.
I do a fair bit of searching AO3 to grab numbers rather than to find fics to read. For these numbers to have any meaning, we have to assume that the fics that show up in the searches are correctly labeled.
If I run two searches like this, I can say that these characters have about the same amount of fic. But anecdotally, Elden Ring oneshots are anthologized more often than Silmarillion oneshots. Perhaps there are actually more Ranni fics on AO3 than Turin fics, and they're lumped together and hidden from the site stats while more of the Turin fics are being counted individually.
If I wanted to dig deeper and crunch some numbers, the problem would intensify. What if I wanted to scrape all the metadata and say there were so many millions of words of Ranni fic? If I wanted that to be accurate, I'd have to manually go through nearly one thousand works to exclude the "chapters" that aren't fics with Ranni in them and have been falsely included in the Ranni tag.
And all this assumes that an anthology tagged "Ranni the Witch (Elden Ring)" even has Ranni in it at all. Overtagging is always an issue, but anthologies are often tagged for future fics the author intends to write and include in the figure; not even trace of nuts tagging or tagging, but literally tagging a fic that does not exist. (I see this with highly specific kink tags on kinktober fill anthologies often enough that it's a personal pet peeve in addition to a data accuracy pet peeve).
From another angle, is the sidebar for the Elden Ring tag that reports 2200 slash fics to 760 femslash fics accurate? Is it safe to assume that slash is anthologized at the same rate as femslash in the Elden Ring fandom? I've seen anthologies with "chapter" counts in the hundreds, how different would the sidebar look if all those fics were accurately labeled?
--
But Osterby, what if someone wants to subscribe to my kinktober fills but not my other work?
Put it in a series.
--
What if someone doesn't want to see my coffee shop AU fic while scrolling through my profile which is primarily vivisection kink fic?
Thanks for thinking of me! I'll filter out the coffee shop AU tag, or I'll scroll through your vivisection kink series.
--
How will people know what order to read my loosely connected oneshots in?
That's what a series is for.
--
How will someone find all my works with the same OC/setting/kink/trope/fandom?
Series.
Or tags.
You can give your own OCs and AU settings their own custom tags.
--
How will someone subscribe to my kinktober fills if they're not all in the same work?
--
What if someone doesn't want to filter and still hates my works?
Skill issue. On their part. Don't prioritize haters over both your intended audience and over people who want to filter out 99% of your work but still want to read that one Cleric Beast/Hunter coffee shop fic.
And also you should block haters, not try grovel to them.
--
What if I want to bury a fic between other stuff and make it harder to find?
Try minimal tagging, nonspecific tags, empty or uninformative summary, and archive locking.
--
If you've stuck with me this long, I've probably convinced you to at least look into the series function.
To create a new series, just make up the name for it while posting (or editing) a fic. It's a ticky box under "associations", right above the "this work has multiple chapters" ticky.
--
And if you need more convincing, a series will allow your readers to leave kudos on each of your fics. Wouldn't it be nice to get 31 kudos from me instead of just one? Pretty please let me kudos each of your shorts as I read through your entire bibliography in one go.
Suggestion: If you don't want to fill up your Works page with a million tiny prompt fills, create a new pseudonym specifically for stuff you would otherwise drop in an anthology! username_promptfics or something. Post the first in the series under your regular pseud too so people can see it, and then tidy the rest away out of sight.
âDo you have to go?â Sirius asked, a bit plaintively. âErm- what I mean is- youâve gone to all the trouble to come out here to the middle of Muggle London to deliver flowers I so rudely rejected, and I feel as though Iâve given you nothing in return.â
Sure, Remus thought sarcastically to himself. Nothing except champagne, eye candy, the possibility of regular floral sales, and your undivided attention.
my second submission for @wolfstarbingo2025 âïž
Rating:Â T
Warnings:Â none, this is pure fluff
Major tags:Â Florist Remus Lupin, Hairstylist Sirius Black, Meet-Cute, Language of Flowers
Word count:Â 3 chapters, 13K words
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remusâs class is going on a field trip to this fancy art gallery and when they get there it turns out sirius just⊠owns the place?? like oh, this massive marble-and-glass gallery full of priceless art? yeah thatâs his.
and instead of staying in his Important Business Meetingsâą he cancels everything for the day so he can personally give the kids the tour.
heâs not like âthis is a renaissance piece blah blahâ either - no, sirius is like âthis painting is of a princess who ran away to live with pirates because she hated royal dinners, and this sculpture? totally cursed, donât touch it or youâll turn into a frog.â every single piece becomes a wild adventure. the kids are obsessed.
remus is standing there the whole time trying not to laugh and also dying a little bit because sirius keeps winking at him mid-story like theyâre co-conspirators in some elaborate prank.
i want you in my room (baby, don't you want me too?)
When Remus ends up with a chance to spy on Sirius enjoying some alone time, he knows he shouldn't watch - and yet he can't resist. But when Sirius lets a certain name slip from his lips, Remus's plan to stay hidden falls apart.
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James and Sirius sit cross legged on the floor of their dormitory, quill and parchment between them, and lolly wrappers scattered around.Â
Sirius taps his chin, listening as James reads out everything on the list so far; all things that would absolutely piss his mother off and have her rolling into an early grave if she ever found out about them.Â
There are a lot of things on this list so far.Â
âHow about⊠mooning the crowd at the next quidditch match?â Sirius suggests.Â
James bursts out laughing, âMerlin, Sirius. That will have Dumbledore rolling into an early grave.âÂ
âGood.â Sirius grinned.Â
âWhat would Minnie say?âÂ
âErm, probably⊠detention for the rest of my life.â He chuckled, âOh, MinnieâŠ. Love her.âÂ
James cracked a bright smile and wrote it down.Â
âWhat else?â Sirius hummed, âI need as many as possible. It betters the chances of them getting back to her.â
âErmâŠâ James thought for a moment, fixing his glasses, âYou could⊠oh, shag a muggle born⊠or like, a halfblood or something?âÂ
Sirius nodded, âYeah, thatâs good⊠I mean, Iâve done it, but I suppose I could do it a few more times.âÂ
âOh, yeahâŠâ James grumbled, forgetting about Siriusâ history with girls, âOoh, you could shag a bloke. That would really send her.âÂ
Siriusâ eyes widened, âA bloke?âÂ
James nodded, âYeah, like, ya knowâŠâ He shrugged, âIâd offer but Iâm a happily committed man, Sirius.â
âHmm.â Sirius bit his lip, thinking about it for a moment, âAdd it to the list, Iâll consider it.â
James grinned and hurried to scribble it down, âShagging⊠a criminal would work too⊠that also goes under the category of becoming a criminal. Because, you know, conspiring with them and all that.â
âOoh, yeah, Iâd shag a criminal.âÂ
âOr like⊠a creature or something.â
âIâm not shagging an animal, James.âÂ
James laughed, âNo! Like⊠like a vampire or something, you know? Or a werewolf.âÂ
âOh, yeah.â Sirius nodded, âThat could be cool.â
âYeah⊠hot, right?âÂ
Sirius shrugged, âErm, I suppose. I like the muggle vampire romance books, soâŠâ
James sighed and wrote it down, âOh, look at that.â He hummed to himself, his tone a little playful, a little curious, âA halfblood, criminal⊠a creature, a blokeâŠâ He chuckled, âYou could just shag Moony.âÂ
âMoony?â Sirius asked, looking down at the parchment.Â
James shrugged, âYouâd be killing like, four birds with one stone. Your mother would be beside herself.â He laughed, âAh, Iâm just playing fun, Sirius. Obviously youâre not gonna go shag Moony. Itâs not like youâre both gay or anything.âÂ
Sirius nodded his head, âYeah, it would be funny though.âÂ
âYeah.â James sighed, looking back at the parchment, âOoh! Let the girls do your makeup and go have dinner in the Great Hall in a dress.âÂ
Sirius swings lazily on his chair, one leg propped up on his bedside table and the other just his toes touching the ground. His hair is tied back all messily, and heâs got his tie loose around his neck and a few buttons on his shirt undone. Heâs humming to himself, watching the record spin and spin and spin on the table until it comes to a scratchy stop.Â
With an effortless swish of his wand, the record lifts itself up and slots itself away into the Ziggy Stardust sleeve on the shelf. And then he groans, throwing his head back and exposing his long pale neck.Â
Remus is going insane.Â
âIâm so bored.â He whines, âWhyâd she have to make my detention so late?â
âTo further punish you, I suppose.â James shrugged.Â
âYou know, you should be thanking me. If I didnât take the fall for you, Prongsie Boy, youâd be the bored one right now.âÂ
âAnd Iâll forever be greatful for it, shnookums.â James laughs, bouncing over to kiss Sirius sloppily on his forehead.Â
Sirius yelps and nearly falls out of his chair, swatting James away, âYouâre disgusting.â
âNo, you are.â James says, tapping Sirius on the end of his nose like a sappy couple would, going back and forth about whoâs cuter.Â
Sirius rolls his eyes and smiles anyway.Â
âIâll see ya later.â James calls, âGotta go do my rounds with Lily.âÂ
âBye.â Sirius waves, and goes back to his chair swinging.Â
Remus barely mutters his goodbye as he watches, and James laughs to himself as he leaves.Â
Itâs just them two now. Alone. In their dorm. James out for the next few hours, Peter no doubt distractedly talking with the girls for hours on end. Remus should go down and join them, he said he would, but⊠well, right now heâd rather watch Sirius swing on his chair.Â
Besides, Sirius has to leave for his detention soon, so he can join them later.Â
Sirius huffs and a shiny strand of hair flies up out of his face. It slowly settles back down, and then Sirius blows it back up into the air again. He does this a few more times, until it falls off the side of his face and out of reach, and Remus watches, entranced the whole time.Â
âMoonshine?â Sirius asks, eyes squinting as he looks out the window. Heâs tracking a bird as it loops around the sky.Â
âYes?â Remus squeaks out, then clears his throat and deepens his voice, âUh, I mean, yes?âÂ
Sirius shrugs, âWould you ever be interested in shagging?âÂ
Remus feels his cheeks go red, âWhat?â
âShagging?â Sirius asks, turning to look at Remus, and itâs mortifying, âLike, sex⊠fucking⊠you know?â
âAh⊠yes?â Remus nods, âYes, Iâd be⊠I mean, who isnât interested in sex?â He laughs nervously.
âErm⊠me, I suppose.â Sirius sighs, looking back up at the roof, âI mean, I do it a lot I suppose- or, well, not that much. But, you know, more than you or Pete and the girls and stuff.â
âRight.â Remus nods.
âBut I mean, itâs not that great. You know, if I never shagged again, I wouldnât care.âÂ
âReally?â He asks, curious.Â
âYeah, I mean, sure, girls are gorgeous and all but⊠eh, you know?âÂ
Remus swallows, âEh?â
âYeah.â He shrugs, âItâs just⊠slimey down there. And like⊠I donât understand the whole boob thing. I guess⊠I âspose itâs not really normal, so I just ignore it. But I donât go out of my way to shag a girl unless she asks, you know?âÂ
âSureâŠâ Remus says, because he very much knows- or, well, not really. He knows he wouldnât shag a girl no matter what, because he doesnât like girls. So he gets that, but he doesnât really understand if Sirius is implying the same circumstance or not.Â
âHave you ever shagged anyone, Remus?âÂ
âNo.â He swallows, âNever.â
âOhâŠâ Sirius nods, âBut you want to?â
âYes.â Remus nods back.Â
Sirius seems to think about this for a moment, humming to himself in quiet contemplation, and Remus just watches. He has no idea what heâs feeling right now, other than downright confused and so fucking intrigued.Â
âWould you ever shag me?âÂ
Remus chokes. He starts coughing and spluttering, cheeks red and eyes wide, âSorry?âÂ
Sirius shrugs, âSorry.â He laughs, âDidnât mean to catch you off guard like that. But would you ever shag me?âÂ
âI⊠I meanâŠâ Remus rubs his forehead, âIâm⊠I donâtâŠâ
âJust, you know how James and I are finding things to piss my mother off?âÂ
âYeahâŠ?âÂ
âWell, we thought it would be good if I shagged a bloke, and a creature⊠a criminal, and like⊠a halfblood.â Sirius smiled, âYouâre an unregistered half blood werewolf with a cock, so-â
âBloody hell, Sirius.â Remus looks at him, absolutely gobsmacked. Lily will go crazy when he tells her about this conversation. âI mean⊠what?âÂ
Sirius shrugged, âI mean, itâs not like Iâm gay or anything. I just know it would piss her off.â
Well, thatâs disappointing.Â
âSo yeah, do you wanna shag?â
âAre you serious?âÂ
Sirius smirked.Â
âI- no.â He scoffed, laughing into his hands as he hid behind them, âAre you genuinely asking me to fuck, right now, Sirius?â
âYeahâŠâ Sirius smiled, âJust a bit of fooling around. It doesnât have to mean anything, and I know weâre both not gay so itâs cool. It doesnât have to be weird.âÂ
âRight.â Remus nods, because heâs not gay, no, not at all.Â
âBesides, imagine the bragging rights.âÂ
âSorry?â Remus hummed.Â
âWell, I can say Iâve fucked a werewolf, and a criminal, which is⊠pretty cool.â He grinned, âAnd you can say youâve fucked Sirius Black.â
âOh, you cocky bastard.â Remus groaned.Â
Sirius laughed, âImagine it, one of those girls in the halls bragging to their friends about how Iâve been inside them- and what, youâd just be able to say youâve been inside me! Something theyâd never be able to say.â
Remusâ eyebrows furrowed, âIâd be inside you?â
âWell, yeah.â Sirius shrugged, âOh, unless you prefer it the other way around. I just think Iâd prefer if you fucked me, is all.âÂ
Remusâ brain is short circuiting. Heâs beginning to question whether or not Sirius is as straight as he claims.Â
âWhen you said shag, I assumed you mean handjobs.âÂ
âOhâŠâ Sirius nodded, looking a little disappointed actually, âOh, yeah, we can⊠we can just do handjobs if you want.âÂ
âErm, no thatâs okay.â Remus cleared his throat, âI can⊠I can, erm, do that, if youâd like.âÂ
âOh, Moons, you donât have to just do it if you donât want. I donât wanna make you uncomfortable.â Sirius smiled, so, so prettily.
âNo, itâs okay, yeah, IâdâŠâ Remus looked away for a moment, unable to believe he was actually having this conversation, âIâll fuck you.â
âOh, brilliant.â Sirius grinned, âYouâre really the best, Remus. Like, my favorite person in the world. Mother will be so pissed if she ever found out- and donât worry, Iâm not just gonna go tell her. Itâs just the idea of it.âÂ
âRight.â Remus nods.Â
âSo, erm⊠Iâve got detention, so we canât do it now⊠how about tonight?âÂ
âTo-â Remus stops himself mid sentence and looks at Sirius aghast, âYouâre just⊠yeah, okay, yeah.âÂ
Sirius hummed, âJames will have his date thing in the astronomy tower by the time I get back from detention so⊠we just have to get Peter out of the room somehow.â
âLeave it to me!â Remus says, âIâve got⊠Iâll figure it out. Iâm⊠yeah, weâre good mates so Iâll sort it.â
âOh, Moonbeam, you really are the best.â Sirius smiles, hopping up out of his chair and bouncing over to pet Remus on the top of his head, âReally, I owe you big time.âÂ
âYeah.â Remus blushed and ducked his head, watching Sirius waltz out of the room, humming a happy tune.Â
â â â
âHoly shit guys, I justâŠâ Remus plops himself down on the couch between Mary and Marlene. Lily is sitting on the floor against Maryâs legs and Peteâs sitting across from her, theyâre playing snap. âI⊠I think Iâm gonna have sex with Sirius.â
All four of them went dead silent, turning slowly to look at him.Â
Remus swallows and looks up, âHe wants to piss of his parents and⊠apparently secretly having sex with me is the perfect way to do that?â
âWhat?â Peter gasps.Â
âYeah, my thoughts exactly, Wormy.â Remus muttered, âErm, weâre gonna shag tonight⊠he wants⊠he wants me to shag him, tonight.âÂ
âMerlinâŠâ Lily grins looking up at him, âOh, Remus!â
Remus bites his lip, blushing, âPete⊠you reckon you can clear the room tonight?âÂ
âTrust me, Iâm staying as far away as possible.â Peter laughed, âBloody hell, I owe James ten galleons. I really didnât think that would work.â
âYou planned this?â Remus asked, âWait, you bet on this?â
Peter looked at him deadpan, âIâve already made fifty galleons from winning bets on Sirius, heâs so predictable. Obviously I bet on this.âÂ
Remus sighs and sinks down into the sofa, âIâm going to have sex with Sirius tonightâŠâ He looks around at them all, âHow do you have sex?â
âOh, Remus.â Lily mused.Â
â â â
Itâs just them. Just Remus and Sirius. The moment he got back from detention James was waltzing out of the room with a cheerful grin, off to his date, and Pete was following right after in hopes of finding Marlene.Â
So theyâre alone already, which makes things so much easier for Sirius.Â
âThanks.â He smiles, âFor sorting Pete out.âÂ
âNo problem.â Remus nodded, âHe was gonna hang out with Marlene anyway.âÂ
âOh, cool.â Sirius said, starting to feel a little awkward, âErm, so, I donât really know how this works.â
âMe either, I suppose.â Remus swallowed, âI did some research, though. Figured out some stuff.â
âOh, MoonsâŠâ Sirius smiled, he really is the most grateful for Remus. He really is the best. He just feels so much admiration for him all the time. âYouâre such a good friend.âÂ
âYep.â Remus nods, âSuch a good friend.â
âSo like⊠are we just doing the sex bit, or foreplay too?â Sirius asked, hoping Remus votes for foreplay. Sirius is good at foreplay, itâs his strong suit. Itâs the part he likes the best of sex, so he doesnât want to make it weird by not enjoying any of this.Â
But foreplay is what people do when they like each other, most of the time. So Sirius would understand if Remus says no to it. Like, it would be extra disappointing, but heâd get it.Â
âForplay?â Remusâ eyes widen.Â
âYeah, like⊠kissing and all that.â He shrugs, âUndressing each other .â
Remus swallows, âSure.â He says, and for some reason his voice just got higher. Sirius likes when Remusâ voice does that, itâs funny and it makes him feel kinda good, like, proud in a way, but he doesnât know why.Â
âOh, cool.â Sirius nods, acting all nonchalant when really heâs feeling very happy inside.Â
âUhm⊠we have to use lube.âÂ
âOhâŠâ Sirius furrowed his brow. Girls donât need lube. He really knows less about this sex stuff than he thought. âRight, well, I think we have some of that butter left from the prank-â
âNot butter.â Remus cuts in, laughing at him, âDefinitely not butter, Sirius. Itâs going inside you-â
âOh, yuck. I donât want butter in my arse.â He grimaced.Â
âYeah, I donât really want it on me either.â Remus laughed, âLike, sex lube.âÂ
âOhâŠâ Sirius nodded, âWhatâs that? Can we make it?âÂ
âNo.â Remus smiled, turning to his bedside draw, âItâs just gel stuff, I guess. Erm, hereâŠâ He tossed a little tube over to Sirius.Â
Itâs see through and has a transparent slime inside, âOh, where'd you get this on such short notice? Itâs half empty.âÂ
Remus went red again. Sirius likes when he makes Remus go red. âErm⊠cause I use it.âÂ
Sirius looked down at the tube, then over at Remusâ crotch, âOh⊠really? I donât need lube when I wank- I mean, not that I wank very often, but itâs always wet enough when I do.âÂ
Remusâ eyes widened and he just stared at Sirius for a moment, âRightâŠâÂ
Sirius shrugged, âThis sex stuff is interesting.âÂ
âErm, youâll also have to be⊠fingered.â Remus gritted out.Â
âCan you finger blokes?â He asks, genuinely baffled as he flips the bottle of lube around in his hand absentmindedly.Â
Remus nods.Â
âOh, I didnât know that⊠why?â
âTo make it like⊠big enough.â Remus nods, âYou know⊠forâŠâ He waved his hands wearily around his crotch.Â
âOh, yeah, I suppose itâs kinda a small hole, hey?â Sirius hummed, the pieces slotting into place now, âCool.âÂ
âYeah, cool.âÂ
âSo⊠like, I havenât kissed a bloke before, but Iâve kissed girls.â Sirius smiled, âHave you kissed a bloke before? I know youâve kissed a couple girls.âÂ
Remus nods, âI kissed Peter once.âÂ
Sirius immediately does not like that. He doesnât know why, but thatâs just weird. Itâs just so, so weird. Peter? Remus has kissed Peter? What the fuck.Â
âWhat?â
âYeah, we made out once-â Remus cuts himself off, giving Sirius an unsure look.Â
Sirius knows itâs because heâs scowling. Heâs not even ashamed of it. Remus and Peter made out, how fucking weird. Thatâs just fucking weird. Thatâs so gross, that so- oh, is Sirius homophobic? Oh, Sirius really doesnât want to be homophobic. A lot of his friends are gay, that would be really bad if he was homophobic.Â
He huffs and looks at the ground, âDid it mean anything-â
âNo.â Remus says immediately, âThe girls just dared us one day, since theyâve all kissed each other- it was just stupid. Didnât mean anything. Never will. Never has.âÂ
âOh, cool.â Sirius nods, some of the weight lifting off of his shoulders. The thought still makes him a little queasy, but less so now.
Perhaps shagging a bloke will make him less homophobic. He really hopes it will. He feels really terrible. His whole life heâs been running from the man his parents tried to shape him into, and yet, the shadow lingers.Â
Itâs terrifying.Â
âErm, so⊠do we just⊠kiss?âÂ
Remus is still for a moment, and heâs looking at Sirius kind of strangely. Sirius doesnât know what to do with himself in all honesty, he never does under Remusâ gaze. Itâs always so intense, it makes him nervous, fiddley⊠giggly.Â
Oh yeah, Remus makes him so giggly. Heâs fighting the urge to giggle like a child now. Remus is just⊠heâs looking at him, like really looking. Sirius feels so special when Remus looks at him, because he knows Remus doesnât look at anyone else like this. No, this look is reserved especially for Sirius and thatâs just⊠well, isnât that just delightful?Â
But he really doesnât want to giggle right now. Heâs trying so hard not too, because that would be embarrassing. He feels like a girl, which is so weird, and so dumb, because why would he ever feel like that?Â
âDo you want to kiss?â Remus asked back eventually.Â
âYes.â Sirius says, without a thought, mouth on autopilot apparently. And thatâs probably a good thing, because his brain is kind of a bit useless at the moment. So much is going on up there, yet there are no thoughts at all. He nods his head for assurance, âYeah, thatâd be good.â
âOkay.â Remus smiled and took a couple of steps closer.Â
Sirius looked at the gap between them, there wasnât much of one, but he certainly wasnât close enough to comfortably kiss. So Sirius took the final step, the baggy wool of Remusâ sweater brushing up against the buttons of Siriusâ shirt.Â
âHi there.â Sirius murmured into the small space between them. If he leant forward, just a smidgen, their noses would bump together.Â
âHi.â Remus smiles, his cheeks flushing a really adorable pink colour, flushed under freckles and scars.Â
Sirius really doesnât know how Remus doesnât get girls, because he thinks Remus is quite attractive. Well, sure, heâs not dashing in the way Sirius effortlessly is, and heâs not cute in the way Peter is, and heâs certainly not stoically handsome like James. But heâs attractive in his own little way, in the Remus way, the way that heâs just really handsome because he simply is and everyone should just agree because Sirius knows.Â
Besides, he looks really cute when heâs about to get kissed. All up close and personal, honey-golden eyes barely visible behind the dilation in his pupils, flushed cheeks smattered under a galaxy of freckles, silver scars that are just so intrinsically Remus, pert lips that look so⊠so⊠uhm, Sirius canât think. Heâs too distracted to think.Â
Point is, Remus is damned attractive and itâs appalling that not more people think so.Â
Remus huffs and bites his lip, and Sirius can feel his eyes searching all over Siriusâ face. But he canât help but stare at the place between Remusâ front teeth, the plush skin, itâs so pink and shiny. Heâs just so⊠so cute.Â
Sirius boops their noses together.Â
Remus almost giggles.Â
Sirius kisses him.Â
Itâs⊠well, itâs so much better than kissing girls. Honestly, Remus must have been practising because heâs just really good at this whole kissing thing. Maybe thereâs a spell or something that makes you really good.Â
Whatever it is, Remus is it. Theyâre not even making out and itâs just so much better than every girl heâs ever kissed, ever.Â
Remus is really just such a good mate, isnât he? Gosh, Sirius really thinks so.Â
Remus shuffles a little closer and tips his head to the side slightly, opening his mouth and sliding his tongue along the seam of Siriusâ own lips.Â
Itâs so well done, his smoothness, that Sirius breaks out in goosebumps. Once this is all over, Sirius will have to tell Remus that he really is just so good at all this kissing stuff.Â
Heâs really that good that Sirius kinda just wants to keep him to himself. Like a little trophy that only he gets to have. No one else should be allowed to be graced with such good kissing skills because honestly, Sirius doesnât think any girl out there would be able to properly appreciate it.Â
Itâs so good, when Remus slips some tongue into Siriusâ mouth and reaches up to tug Sirius in by the belt loops, that he moans. He actually moaned, and heâs not even embarrassed because Remus needs to know just how good at this he is.Â
Remus tugs him closer and Sirius lifts his hands to grab at the back of Remusâ neck and tug at the jumper over his shoulder because something has just come over him. Something wild. Some primal need or something to just tear Remusâ clothes off and have him. He blames Padfoot.Â
They shuffle back to Siriusâ bed until Remusâ knees buckle and he flops down onto it. Sirius shoves himself into Remusâ lap, straddling him and pressing close which just feels⊠so good. Like, Remus really doesnât know how good he is.Â
He must be some sex god or something. How Remus hasnât had sex yet, Sirius doesnât know. But what he does know, is that Remus is so fucking wonderful and Sirius doesnât want to share.Â
How strange is that?Â
Remusâ bony fingers reach up to undo the buttons on Siriusâ shirt, but before he can even get halfway, Sirius is yanking Remusâ jumper up and off his body in a rush.Â
âSo good.â He mutters, leaning in to kiss Remus again. He starts shoving off his own shirt before Remus can do the last button. âOh, youâre really good at this, Moony.âÂ
Remus moans against his mouth and wow, holy Godrick, thatâs really a wonderful sound. How are his moans even that brilliant? This really isnât fair. How is Sirius ever supposed to be so good in bed? He really hopes he doesnât let Remus down.Â
âFuck.â Remus mumbles, latching his lip onto Siriusâ throat and groaning when Sirius digs his nails into Remusâ shoulders, âYou- oh, youâre really- youâre so hot.â
Sirius flushes all over, and he dips back down to kiss Remus again. He canât help but giggle.Â
â â â
âPlease, please, please, please.â Sirius is mumbling, actually completely naked underneath Remus which is just⊠itâs really a sight to behold. Itâs an image which will be imprinted in Remusâ mind for the rest of eternity.Â
Remus canât help but duck down to kiss him, right on the lips, because Sirius seems to actually really love that. He actually seems to really love a lot of things involving Remus sexually.Â
Remus moans, his hips pressing down against Siriusâ. The friction from that alone is far better than anything he conjures up in his mind and creates with his own right hand at night.Â
âYeah.â He nods, âYeah, erm⊠do⊠do you wanna do it yourself?â
âDo what?â Sirius gasps, bucking his hips up when Remus doesnât grind down again.Â
âFinger yourself.â Remus says bluntly, because thereâs really no other way to say it.Â
âOh, uhmâŠâ Siriusâ eyes fly open, and they flick around Remusâ face for a bit before he flushes more than he already has and smiles, âCan you do it? I donât really know what Iâm doing, and Iâll just probably like it more if you did⊠youâre like⊠really bloody good at this sex stuff.âÂ
Remus knows for a fact that he is not really bloody good at this sex stuff. Heâs never even done it before, and heâs being really awkward as he always is. The first kiss they shared he was so stiff for, and he literally opened his mouth and shoved his tongue out really weirdly because he was just so shocked by Sirius actually doing this. He knows that was a terrible kiss, but Sirius just kept kissing him anyway. And then Sirius kinda took the lead there a little and gave Remus some time to figure it out, thankfully.Â
So yeah, Remus knows heâs so fucking bad at this. He knows Sirius has been with a good handful of girls who are confident, and experienced, and way nicer to look at. And yet, Sirius wonât stop banging on about how fucking good Remus is at all of this, how his mouth is fucking magic, and how heâs making Sirius all tingly.Â
Itâs like a dream. A real dream brought to life or something. Remus really pinched himself at one moment to make sure he wasnât actually dreaming it up.Â
But no. Itâs real. And Siriusâ is enjoying it. And Sirius wants Remus to finger him. And Sirius wants to have sex with Remus.Â
Remus is almost certain that Sirius just⊠isnât actually into girls at this point. Or at the very least, is into guys in one way or another.Â
Remus grabs the lube from under Siriusâ back, where heâd landed on it a while ago when taking off his trousers. He pops the cap and squeezes a big glob of lube onto his fingers before spreading it around a little.Â
Sirius gazes up at him, his legs are slightly open, spread around Remusâ own knees, all just⊠naked for him. His gaze is heavy lidded, and Remus fights the urge to look further downward.Â
âJust be nice, yeah?â Sirius asks, a finger reaching out to draw over a scar on Remusâ middle. âI havenât been fingered or anything before, so⊠do you think it will hurt?âÂ
Remus shakes his head, âAh⊠I did it to myself once. If you go slow it doesnât⊠Iâll go slow.âÂ
âOkay.â Sirius blushes again, âYou really are the best, Moonshine.âÂ
Merlin, that name? Oh, Remus is starting to lose it. Heâs actually going to lose his mind about it. Itâs bad enough as is, when Sirius calls him that just out and about. It makes his heart race and his stomach fill with butterflies.Â
But here? Now? Well, Remus is going to implode. Heâs so, so fucking into Sirius itâs sickening.Â
âThanks.â Remus mutters, reaching a sticky finger down between Siriusâ legs, âErm, is that⊠are youâŠ. Can I?â
âYeah.â Sirius breathes, his eyes falling shut, âO-oh, fuck, yeah. Oh, Moony, youâre so⊠mhm, youâre so good at this.âÂ
Remusâ brain melts a little more, because he hasnât actually done anything. Really, his finger is just sitting there, only the very tip of it has pushed inside and Sirius is there acting like Remus is just about to make him cum.Â
Sirius really canât be straight. Heâs either really good at faking it, or really, really gay.Â
Remus hopes for the latter.Â
âWhat about that? Hurt?â
âNo.â Sirius hums, smiling to himself as he turns his head into the pillows, his hands gripping the sheets, âNo, sâgood. Oh, Moonbeam, youâre- oh, youâd never⊠never hurt me. Never hurt me, baby. Sâgood.â
Remus has suddenly lost all coherent thought.Â
â â â
Sirius feels euphoric.Â
Really, he wishes he had sex with Remus earlier because this is just fucking brilliant. Remus is really just so good.Â
When Sirius has sex with girls, he feels kinda good physically a lot. Like, his cock likes it, he supposed. But itâs usually really boring. Itâs just not all that great, he doesnât get why James likes sex so much.Â
But like, with Moony? Well, everything is great. Heâs just really good at it, and he must know exactly what heâs doing because no matter what it just makes Sirius feel so amazing.Â
Physically and emotionally. Like, everywhere. He feels like a live wire.Â
âR-Remus.â He stutters out, because heâs not very good at talking anymore. Heâs mostly just loudly moaning and stuff. Like, itâs so loud that Remus actually stopped midway through to cast a silencing charm so people outside the dorm wouldnât hear. âOh, fuck, Remus. Please, can you just fuck me?â
âShit.â Remus moans, âF-fuck, yeah. You⊠you sure? You sure you want that?âÂ
Sirius nods, because if Remus fingering him is this good, then he really wants to find out about the rest of it.Â
âYeah, please.â Sirius said, âReally, really, please, Moonybaby. Oh, fuck- youâre so- youâre so good at- uh.âÂ
âFucking- okay, yeah.â Remus chokes out, pulling his hand away from Sirius. Â
He canât help but whine about it, feeling so cold and empty. He reaches out to cling to Remus, but all he gets are glorious, sweaty, scarred thighs.Â
He lifts his head when he hears a wet sound, and watches Remus smear some lube over himself, quite entranced by it. He watches the slick glide of Remusâ wonderful hands and wishes it was himself between those magical fingers.Â
Remus comes closer, and Sirius immediately grabs for him. His arms sling around Remusâ neck, fingers sifting in through hair and clawing at his back.Â
âOh, Moony.â Sirius moans, kissing him as much as Remus will let him, âPlease. Oh, youâre so⊠oh, R-Remus.â
âBloody hell, Sirius.â Remus grunts, pressing in as close as he can. His whole body shivers as he slowly sinks down, Sirius whining helplessly in his ear. He canât help it, it feels so fucking good, just like he thought. âOh, fuck, youâre so- so hot. So fucking⊠oh, fuck.â
Sirius canât stop kissing, everywhere. Anywhere his lips can reach heâs attaching himself to Remus. It really is quite delightful, getting fucked by his sex god best friend.Â
He thinks about recommending it to James, but thankfully James is a committed man. Then perhaps Peter, but- no, theyâve already kissed, theyâve done enough. Besides, Sirius is apparently homophobic about that so he probably shouldnât suggest it.Â
Maybe heâll just tell everyone Remus is really bad, so no one else goes and fucks him- yeah, that sounds good. No one else gets to have him, only Sirius.Â
Heâs probably a really bad friend for that, but, well, he doesnât really care right now because Remus is just making him feel so, so good. Like, really lucky.Â
â â â
Sirius is clinging to Remus like heâs his life line. Itâs probably the best feeling in the world. And yes, that includes the feeling of been balls deep inside Sirius.Â
Both are fucking amazing, but being clung too by Sirius beats it by just a smidgen.Â
Heâs shaking, actually, so much to the point that Remus had thought heâd done something wrong. But no, Sirius has assured him itâs purely because he just feels fucking amazing. That Remus is doing a bang on job.Â
Really, Remus isnât sure why Sirius keeps saying such things. Like, sure, now itâs fine because Remus has found a rhythm and gotten more comfortable doing this, but he was so awkward those first few thrusts. They were miscalculated, and kinda desperate, and just not very good, he could tell. But still, Sirius had said itâs the best feeling ever.Â
Remus doesnât know what to do with himself. So he just lets his body do whatever the hell it needs. And what it needs is to make Sirius finish, and apparently, to say dumb shit heâs going to regret later.Â
âYouâre so⊠so fucking pretty, baby.â He mutters, kissing Sirius between each few words, âSo good, so gorgeous. Feels so good- so good. Oh youâre just so good, so-â
Remus reels back, because Sirius is thrashing almost violently, and is getting louder and- Remus looks down to find white smeared all over Siriusâ stomach.Â
Sirius doesnât give Remus time to process that before heâs pulling him down into a deep kiss and thrusting his own hips up to meet Remusâ.Â
âThank you, thank you, thank you, thank you.â Sirius is muttering on repeat, smattering kisses everywhere on Remusâ face as he chases his own. âOh, so- so good, Moonshine. Youâre so good, too good to me.âÂ
Remus presses their foreheads together as he cums and kisses Sirius midway through. When he pulls away, Sirius is dazed.Â
He has a faraway, dreamy look in his eyes and a relaxed smile on his lips. His cheeks are bright pink, a stark contrast to his pale complexion, and his skin shimmers with sweat.Â
Oh, he really is just so fucking pretty.Â
âFuck.â Remus grunts, shifting until heâs laying down beside Sirius, both on their backs, shoulders overlapped.Â
Sirius whines as Remus slips away, and shivers slightly. Remus grabs his jumper off the pillow and lays it over Siriusâ chest like a blanket.Â
âHmm.â He hums, and closes his eyes.Â
Remus cleans them both up, reaching the end of the box of tissues on Siriusâ bedside. But theyâre clean, so itâs fine.Â
They lie there in silence for a while. Remus feels the moment Sirius comes too again, stiffening beside him. Itâs awkward, tense. Slowly, Sirius shucks Remusâ jumper off his chest and they both lie there, completely naked, staring at the roof.Â
They hear James and Peter come into the room, âTold you.âÂ
âDonât believe you.â James muttered back, âPads, mate, you in here?â
âJames, theyâre probably having a meaningful conversation.â Peter huffs, âLook at the curtains.âÂ
âWell, I want to see him.â
âYou can later.â Peter offers, âSirius, if you want James to come in, say something back.â
âDonât come in!â Sirius shouts, and silence lingers outside.Â
âSee, he doesnât want you too.â Peter says after a while, âCompletely silent.âÂ
âThe charm must still be on.â Remus muttered.Â
âOh.â Sirius nodded.Â
âFine.â James groaned, âCome to my bed later, Sirius. Iâm going to sleep.â
Sirius and Remus lie there for a while, listening to James and Peter get ready for bed. Honestly, Remus is glad Peter didnât say anything to James about them having sex.Â
Or, well, he doesnât think he said anything.Â
Not that heâd be mad if James found out Remus is gay. Heâs pretty sure James already knows. But, heâs sure Sirius would want to tell him about that. Sirius would probably have some strange things to say about it, so, itâs best if Sirius is the one to lay it all out there.Â
Once the room goes silent again, and the lights are all turned out, they dare a glance over at each other. Just as quickly, they look away.Â
Remus starts to feel a little guilty. He knows how he feels about Sirius, and Sirius clearly hadnât felt the same way. At least not prior to now. So, he decides to bite the fucking bullet, despite his own judgments, and confessess.Â
âI liked that.âÂ
âYeah, me too.â Sirius nodded, eyes fixed on the roof, âFelt good. You made me cum really hard.â
Merlin, he really doesnât make anything easy for Remus, does he?Â
âYeah.â Remus nods, âBut like⊠I liked it in a gay way.â
Sirius tenses beside him again.Â
âErm, cause Iâm gay.â Remus fills in, refusing to look anywhere but the stupid poster of a half naked motorbike girl on Siriusâ ceiling. âAnd I like you.â
âYou⊠like me?â Sirius mumbles.Â
âYeah.â Remus breathes, âA lot⊠I think youâre⊠brilliant. Youâre really, really, fucking brilliant. And also really good at sex.â
Sirius swallowed, âSo, do you think Iâm pretty?â
âYeah.â Remus nodded, âI said it, before.âÂ
âI thought you might have just been doing sex talk.âÂ
âOhâŠâ Remus swallows, âWere you just doing sex talk?â
âNo.â Sirius shakes his head, âI just⊠no, it was all honest. But, girls often make up sex talk, so-â
âIâm not a girl.âÂ
âYeah, I know.â Sirius swallowed, âSo you⊠you fancy me, for real?â
âYeah.â Remus nods, âA lot.â
âOh.âÂ
Remus chewed on his lip.Â
âExcuse me.â Sirius muttered, and then climbed out of bed.Â
He didnât even stop to put trousers on or anything. Remus listened as he walked over and pulled back the curtains of Jamesâ bed.Â
âOh, Sirius, hey, I- Merlin! Where are your clothes?â
âOver there. Remus and I had sex.âÂ
There was silence for a while before James said back, âWhat?â
âRemus and I had sex.âÂ
âWhen?â James asked, fucking gobsmacked.Â
âJust then.â Sirius said, âBefore you came into the room.âÂ
âWh- why?â
âIt was your idea!â He said defensively, âYou said I should just fuck Remus, so I did. I fucked Remus- or, rather, he fucked me.âÂ
âAnd you just decided to come tell me this, still very naked?â
âYeah.â Sirius said, âI think I can still feel his cum inside-â
âBloody hell, Sirius. You know he can- just, get in.â
âDo you want me to put clothes on?âÂ
âMerlin, I donât care, justâŠâ
âHeâs gay, you know?â Remus heard Sirius shuffle into the bed, âSaid he likes me.âÂ
âWow, really?â James gasped, âI had no fucking idea. Itâs not like he stares at you longingly or anything.âÂ
âOhâŠâ Sirius mumbled, âI think Iâm homophobic, by the way.âÂ
âSorry?â
âYeah, he said he kissed Pete and that made me feel kind of nauseous.âÂ
There was another long stretch of silence, and then from his own bed, Peter muttered, âYou owe me twenty gallons, James.âÂ
âFuck.â James muttered, drawing the curtains around them, âLook, Sirius, youâre not homophobic.â
âErm, yes I am.â Sirius said in defence, âWhy else would I get mad about Remus getting involved with other blokes?â
âOh, Sirius.â James sighed, and cast a silencing charm around them.Â
â â â
Remus is startled awake by the curtains swishing back. Not that he slept very deeply, just a little nap. Heâs still in Siriusâ bed. He was too anxious to move.Â
Now that he sees Sirius standing there, still very naked, he feels like he should have left.Â
Sirius lifts up the corner of his blanket and slides under, closing the curtain around them before casting another silencing charm.Â
He tugs at the sheet and gestures for Remus to get under. And then they both lie there again, shoulder to shoulder, staring at the roof.Â
âYou okay?â Remus asks after a long silence. He feels so awkward about it.Â
âYep.â Sirius nods, âJust⊠trying to figure out the least scary way to ask you to be my boyfriend.â
Remusâ heart falls out from under him, âWhat?â
âOh.â Sirius mutters, âI guess I just did, didnât I?â
âAre you serious?â Remus gasps, turning to look at him.Â
Sirius smirks and turns his head slowly to look back at Remus.Â
âDonât answer that.â He mutters, âIâmâŠâ
âYeah.â Sirius nods, genuinity behind his pretty, pale eyes, âErm, yeah, James told me Iâm gay.â
âWhat?â Remus gaped, âWhat do you mean he told you you were gay?â
Sirius shrugged, âLike, Iâve been gay this whole time, and I really like you. I just didnât know it, is all. I thought I was homophobic, can you believe that? James just made me realise I was jealous.â
âJealous⊠of Peter?âÂ
âYes. Never look at him again, please.â Sirius said sternly.Â
Remus furrowed his brow, looking at Sirius in shock.Â
Sirius broke into a grin, âIâm kidding. But really, I did get jealous. Iâm jealous about you a lot. Itâs why I get so angry at you sometimes.â
âOh.â Remus swallowed, âThatâŠâ
âYeah.â Sirius smiled, laughing at himself softly, âItâs stupid. Iâm stupid.â
âYouâre not.â Remus corrects, âYouâre really smart. Youâre the smartest person I know. Sometimes this stuff is just really hard, I get it. I know.âÂ
He blushes, and itâs fucking adorable. Itâs always adorable.Â
âYouâre so sweet, Moony.â Sirius hums, kissing Remusâ shoulder, âSo, will you?â
âWill I what?â
âBe mine?â He asks.Â
âOhâŠâ Remusâ heart is racing. Itâs going so fast, beating so hard he can feel it in his throat, âYes. Fuck, yes please.âÂ
Sirius breaks out into the most brilliant smile before rolling over and wrapping himself around Remus, âYay.âÂ
Remus hugs him back, entangling their legs together and hoping they never have to untangle, âYou really mean it?â
âYeah.â Sirius hums, pressing his lips to Remusâ skin a few times, âOh, I was so crazy for not knowing it, Moonshine. Iâm mental about you.âÂ
Remus feels extatic, âIâm mental about you too, sweetheart.âÂ
âOh, I really like that.â Sirius mused, âI really like you.â
Remus chuckled, âOkay, sweetheart.âÂ
Sirius hums, content, snuggling closer into Remusâ side, âGod, imagine my mother now. Not just shagging an unregistered werewolf bloke, but now heâs my boyfriend?â
âSheâd have a heart attack.âÂ
âGood.â Sirius smiled, âOh, I love when everything just comes together like this. James is so exited. He owes Pete a lot of money, theyâve been betting on us for ages.âÂ
Remus snorts, âI think Peteâs been cheating then. Heâs known Iâm into you for ages.â
Sirius snorts, âOf course he is.â He lifts his head to kiss Remus sweetly, âLet me take you out on a date, Moonybaby?â
Remus melted, sighing against Siriusâ lips, âYeah, please.âÂ
âOh, Iâm gonna woo you so hard, you wonât even know what hit you.â Sirius smiled, âAnd then weâre gonna shag so much again, because I didnât know shagging was actually fun.â
Remus snorts and kissed Sirius some more, âI did, I was just waiting for you to prove it.âÂ
The way that Sirius swooned made Remus feel like he was on top of the fucking world.Â
â â ⌠â ⟠â ⌠ââ
HAPPY HORNY SATURDAY! i hope you enjoyed this one, it was very fun to write. just a silly little bit of smut because why the hell not, i say?!
don't forget to reblog and commentary is ALWAYS welcome here. thankies!
Since you guys were interested Iâm just tagging you here :)) hope you enjoyed!! <3 @stranger200-blog @addsalwayssick
Enough people have said that they wanted it so here is the list to every Marauders era character that I could find.
There are 161 characters listed. A few are ocs of mine but the ones who are canon are also equipped with as much information on them as I could find. Iâve also included some of my headcanons for the ones who I have headcanons for. You can completely ignore the headcanons if you like or you could take some of them on board with your own, itâs completely your choice. I have made it very clear what is canon and what are headcanons.
Please note that I originally made this list for myself to help me organise all of the characters in order to make placing them in my fics easier. This is not supposed to be some introduction to the marauderâs guide or anything like that. My reason for sharing this is to hopefully encourage people to use the more unknown characters in their own interpretation of the era.Â
Also, itâs not finished I will be constantly editing it (though obviously everything canon will stay the same)Â