connie

Look I know this is a scientific publication but you don’t understand— we need to include milk and cookies in the photo. We have to. Otherwise the science suffers

the only roman emperor i respect is honorius because, during his reign, rome was sacked, and when someone brought him the news that rome had perished he freaked out bc he thought they were talking about his pet bird named "rome," and when they explained that they were talking about the city he was like "oh thank god. who gives a shit"

shouldve called his ass hilarious

"At that time they say that the Emperor Honorius in Ravenna received the message from one of the eunuchs, evidently a keeper of the poultry, that Rome had perished. And he cried out and said, 'And yet it has just eaten from my hands!' For he had a very large cock, Rome by name; and the eunuch comprehending his words said that it was the city of Rome which had perished at the hands of Alaric, and the emperor with a sigh of relief answered quickly: 'But I thought that my fowl Rome had perished.' So great, they say, was the folly with which this emperor was possessed." —Procopius, The Vandalic War (III.2.25–26)

He had a what?!?!

like 99% of "men and women are soooo different!!!" comedy is literally just describing the experience of not understanding other people. like it's not that women never say what they mean talking to other people is just like that. it can be hard to understand what other people are thinking. bioessentialism really rots the brain

"women will say I'm fine and then not mean it" yeah that's something literally everybody does. is this your first time interacting with another human being my guy

this is one of the only funny responses on this hell of a post

“I LOVE that game!” (watched a letsplay and commentary about it)

this counts and i’ll hear nothing against it

if watching sports counts as enjoying the sport, then watching video games counts as enjoying video games.

And literally a huge part of gaming has ALWAYS been the experience of sitting around together, watching one person in the group play while everyone else cheers, heckles, shrieks, and generally has a good time.

bastille has done more for the queer community by just making all of their love songs about "you" instead of specifying a gender than taylor swift has in all of her discography. thanks for coming to my ted talk.

this post is VERY funny bc it has a fuck ton of likes and like. two reblogs. the fear of the wrath of the swifties is VISCERAL.

sometimes i wish i could tell other women that you can just stop removing your body hair and in many cases the consequences will be way less severe than u expect. you can go to the beach with all your leg hair intact and nobody will stop you or say a thing. you can stop waxing your upper lip and people won’t stare at it the way u might be bracing yourself for. you can quit plucking your brows and eventually they will grow back into themselves and no one will even notice. like for sure women are punished for not participating in beauty rituals but i also feel like so much of it is like The Panopticon sometimes where you just convince yourself that if u stop that kind of gendered upkeep everyone will be mad and stop talking to u forever when in reality you just keep existing and nothing remarkable happens. it’s not always easy but you can kind of just stop for real

love how the tags range from "they are arguing" to "they are lesbian"

the way ppl have designated cuddling as a purely romantic thing and is weird outside of that context has done widespread damage to our pack animal nature

ABORTION MOVE Hey y'all, this is urgent. fuckass draconian abortion laws in my state make it an impossibility for me to get the abortion I need, so I'm trying to leave so I can stay with my friend in Penn. Trying to raise $300 to cover the rest of the move, motel, etc. thanks to everyone who shares, donates, etc. fundraiser here Goal is to leave by the end of the day