S.O.S, I'm stuck in a Tumblr

I die for this ship 😭

Bruce outs Clark as Superman while Clark is interviewing him and Lex. "I don't know why you two can't get along like you are now 😔 Superman, maybe Lex just wants to spend time with you 🤔 And Lex, babe, the robots are cool and all but you can't like throw them at Superman 😶 That's not how you make friends." Lex tells Bruce to stop, rolling his eyes. Bruce goes on a rant about how the butts match etc. Clark is literally sat so still, trying not to move.

Lex yelling at Bruce when he pretends to not have overheard a conversation Lex was having with an arms dealer in Korean and Lex is all "you speak fourteen languages, Bruce" and you got Bruce who is near tears over this because he only speaks two? "I only speak American and English 😭😭"

Bruce giggling at some charity quiz show panel between Ollie and Lex, because he's so sorry but he doesn't know any countries? Like what are they??? Lex is screaming at him while Ollie hits the button so confidently going "Las Vegas".

Bruce sitting next to Lex on a plane (they're economising for PR) and he's fucking reading a book that's upside down???

Robert is showing a new SDN dispatcher around or a new training hero and being very serious and professional and then all of a sudden here comes Flambae, just smoooooth walking up to Robert.

And Robert raises a brow and looks at him with a grin.

"Yes? Can I help you, Flambae."

"I heard you get off at 6. Been watching you for awhile. Think you're pretty cute. Was thinking of taking you out tonight" Flambae says as he leans against the wall hovering over Robert, the new recruit staring wide eyed and mouth agape. Robert snickers quietly. "Sounds fun... not too sure my boyfriend would be pleased about that though..."

Flambae waves a hand, dismissing the 'concern' but the newbie is flabbergasted cuz 'what?! You have a boyfriend!? And you're agreeing to go on a date with this guy!?'

Flambae leans in closer, still grinning "Don't you worry about him. I can handle a challenge"

"I dunno ... my boyfriend is pretty possessive and really hot tempered.... Would set you ablaze if he catches you flirting with me." Robert responds. Flambae shrugs. "I can handle a little heat. So what do you say.... take you out to that fancy Thai place down town. Get a few drinks and then go back to my place later"

Robert rolls his eyes, "Yea sure. Sounds like a good time" Flambae smolders, pleased and swipes a finger under Robert's chin, "pick up when you get off, Gorgeous. Don't keep me waiting" and then turns and saunteers, not walks, saunteers away!!

The new recruit is quick to scold Robert!

"Sir!! With all due respect, I know that man is ... really REALLY attractive but you have a boyfriend and you just agreed to--" Robert starts laughing quietly.

mama bat WILL strangle a mf over her babies

Superman is... a guy called Clark Kent. Yeah he's an alien but he works at a newspaper. He says shit like "y'all'd've" and idioms like "that dog just ain't going to hunt".

Martian Manhunter goes by... John? J'onn? Another alien sure but is a cop on the outside of this? Who goes by John?

Batman is… Bruce Wayne. Yup, the Bruce Wayne. The billionaire himbo who went viral for accidentally stumbling onto a Victoria Secret runway and walking it waving really awkwardly, whispering that he was looking for the bar?

Wonder Woman calls herself Diana and yes, she's a Princess, daughter of a god and literally made out of clay but she carries tote bags that say shit like “Ask me about ancient Greek pottery”.

The Flash is… a forensic scientist who keeps leaving his lunch to rot in the breakroom fridge and yelling when Batman throws it away because he was doing an experiment or something. He's this guy called Barry who has been overheard muttering the rhyme about tying shoelaces.