"Jesus Christ, he's still alive?"

@confessionsofasexydilf

did anything happen with this

i got bit by a snake! quick!! you have to jerk me off to get the poison out! and pinch my nipples a little, too. and call me good boy! yeah that’s the only antidote I looked it up on Internet Explorerrrrrrr

i didn’t post this. i was hacked and this is all they posted #promise

can you tell the hacker to come back

"save me, substance abuse!" i cry. before you can moralize to me about the dangers of addiction, a noble and powerful steed gallops into the room - my horse whom i have named "substance abuse". you learn an important lesson about making assumptions. i snort a line off its back

yesterday i had a nice southern teenager call me "ma'am" and then look at me and go, in a well-meaning tone, "uhhhh, if you go by ma'am. sorry if not." and i had to be like yeah man ma'am is fine. appreciate you being inclusive though. i could almost see the little warning pop up in his UI-- hold up! people with blue hair often have pronouns. are you sure you want to address this individual with a gendered term?

We’re having dirt and milk dinner

Which one of you stupid fucks labeled my dirt and milk dinner post as mature content

Are you saying I’m a whore.

?????

oh you're concerned about the discord changes? you should switch to using Pig. you have to host your own server and it doesn't work on mobile and obviously it doesn't have the fancier features like screensharing and voice calls and servers and file sharing and friend requests and instant messaging but it's compatible with ModoHost and Grub

Blocked, flambeed, and unfollowed is pretty awesome tho

Why don't they make stained glass fish tanks? Give those fish Catholic guilt

fascinated by the implication that it's the stained glass that gives catholics the guilt

I've been put in the tank 😔