Concoction Boy

Okay I kind of think this is probably some sort of scam, but I just received a letter saying I had been judged a sufficiently notable slime to be listed in the latest edition of Ooze Who.

You might think that with shapeshifting abilities I would spend a lot of time in the form of a dinosaur but what you do not realize is that I am very indecisive and there are lots of kinds of dinosaur to choose from.

Yeah, no, those popup tips are straight-up lying; I don't take extra damage from ice spells at all.

Okay I like using my shapeshifting abilities to try out new shapes I have not been in before but turning myself into a piñata was probably a mistake.

Yeah, no, that's not a tumor. I don't think slimes get tumors. It's a hamburger. Yeah, I just stuck it inside myself it a few hours ago and I'm just slowly digesting it so I can savor it.

I think a lot of people don't appreciate the important role evil wizards play in the ecosystem.

I guess slimes and genies can both come in bottles, but unlike a genie I'm not good at granting wishes, unless your wish is something like "I wish the floor was slightly sticky."

As a slime I don't have fingerprints which I guess would make it easier to commit crimes if I wanted to do that but does make it kind of hard to get, like, a driver's license.

As a living potion created in a vat by an evil wizard, in one way I am like a robot in that I was artificially created and given life but in another way I am kind of almost the opposite of a robot because I am liquid and robots are solid oh and also maybe I guess because I was created through magic and robots are created through technology but honestly I think the opposition of magic and technology is frequently exaggerated but anyway now I'm kind of wondering whether anyone has tried to create a slime robot or whether there could even be such a thing as a slime robot and what it would be like which wasn't what this post was originally going to be about but I mean it just got me wondering...

So a lot of people think of green slime as something that lurks on the ceiling and drips down onto people passing below and okay as a green slime I've kind of thought that was an unfortunate stereotype but then it just occurred to me that I've never actually tried lurking on the ceiling and dripping down onto people passing below and I don't know maybe it would be fun.