my little dark age

being sexy literally has nothing to do with looks... you need to be a little bit weird and strange and unusual. people who are physically perfect by societal standards are not sexy like where's the flavour. the body hair. i'm right

the thoughts that women have while drunk peeing at the bar looking at their own underwear should be revered like the bible

sometimes, the only way i know my roommate is still alive is the $30 cheese that appears and disappears from our fridge

*grabbing you by the hair while you are blindfolded and kneeling* no damnit, thats the phillips-head screwdriver, you can tell because its vibrational aura is two waves, the yin being a half cycle out of phase. try again. place your fingers into the toolbox again, but this time feel with the spirit, not the body

being aware that your behavior is shaped by childhood experiences is so cringe every time i notice it im like ooo look at her can't even get over what someone told him when she was 7. grow up