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im sorry sy its a loaded question. it doesnt even go into the material consequences of what a rash decision will do. but i needed someone to hear. someone who hasnt heard before. someone not involved. maybe this is attention seeking. if you think it is. i'm sorry.

there are lots of ways of getting materials to survive, but there are not a lot of ways to live when you arent you. you just have to go and do things youve never done before to get out of the cycle of where you are now. you need to explore.. youll probably lose some stability and struggle and be uncomfortable for a bit after taking the plunge, but the big question is if not now, then when? will you change tomorrow? in a week? next month? a couple of years? how long can you continue living as a shell of a person, in places you arent loved? will it be until you cant continue and your stability change outside of your control? are you gonna make that switch or will you let yourself decay until it unravels?