best storylines are the ones where the wildest most off-the-wall shit occurs, one thing after another, unrelenting, and then at the end you realize it’s been happening over the course of like.. just a week. everyone’s been having a HELL of a week in that universe. that shit was happening on a thursday. of all days.

im gods weakest faggot

i’m gods strongest tranny let’s team up. what if we called ourselves team rocket

im gods most literate cat can i join

I’m a straight up mob boss with a lioness for a pet, you’re all hired.

my yellow rat and I find this really offensive and problematic

she went after my cock like she was smeego. and I was that gay little ring.

once these 15 million different stressful situations resolve themselves I’m gonna be so normal again. I can be normal and not exhausted

(Getting swindled by a genie) it’s like talking to a fucking tumblr user with you

the genie: how dare you say I'm fucking a tumblr user

the problem with being like "this is like being in a mental hospital" about a piece of media is that people with no experience in mental hospitals will start to play off of that and say things that are just wrong. like no no no, i'm allowed to say these things because i know what it's like. you're just making incorrect assumptions.

(To the tune of Rasputin): BLEH BLEH DRACULA, KING OF TRANSYLVANIA, HE IS A BAT AND ALSO A MAN

they can't stop you from thinking about gay sex on company time