domus perkele

we need to bring back the phrase "what business is it of yours" in a big way i'm serious

i know you can just say "none of your business" but phrasing it as a question with a jarringly formal tone is the ideal way to shoot an overfamiliar unwelcome overture dead in its tracks and force the person making it to confront the boundaries they're taking for granted + it would really piss people off which is funny

The only true way to immortality is to say so much weird shit that your words will forever live rent-free in other peoples' heads. Like the person who decided to string together the sequence of words "shaking like a chihuahua shitting out a peach stone." Like why did you make me read that. It emerges in my head regularly, whenever I least expect it and the situation needs it the least.

I've never seen The Social Network but I do think about the quote when Rooney Mara's character tells Mark Zuckerberg that he will go through life thinking women don't like him because he's a nerd but it will actually be because of his terrible personality. And I have to say whenever someone gets really knee-jerk "SO YOU HATE ME BECAUSE OF [IDENTITY]?" It springs unbidden to mind. Like, yes, bigotry is real, but sometimes people don't like you because you're fucking unpleasant, and any oppressed identities you may lay claim to do not enter into the equation, because the problem is that you are an asshole. And specifically, if you refuse to accept that people can have non-bigoted reasons for disliking you, chances are high you ABSOLUTELY are going to suck to be around for the simple reason that someone who never considers the possibility that someone might not enjoy their company not because of their identity but because of their actions will be entirely insensitive to any feedback re: their actions, which is the precise recipe for an asshole.

never lose hope. somewhere, a middle-aged, gender ambiguous person with an advanced degree in an esoteric field and a fiber arts hobby could be crashing out and pinning all their remaining mental health on getting obsessed with your otp. any day now, the most elegantly written 100k fanfic you have ever read is going to hit ao3. it could happen. it has happened.

"bottom" please consider 🫵 whether the word you are looking for is in fact "submissive" ! because if we decide that taking dick means your personality & character r inherently subservient 😃 we might as well just throw in the towel on the most basic premise of feminism & 🔫 kill ourselves 🎉

kind of weird how parts of your soul are left in various locations without any warning… like yes i’m always at the top of that hill, sitting at the bus stop, in the cool light of the Japanese restaurant, standing at the pier etc etc

eternal ass june ive already reincarnated 10,000 lives this month

one of the reasons I'm still religious despite my lifelong battle with faith is that the fantasy aesthetic of judaism is too good. You're telling me a faceless formless god made a covenant with my ancestors bound in sacred scrolls handwritten by master scribes on parchment too holy to touch, and these scrolls are decorated and revered and protected and held in such high regard that when the cabinet they are kept in is open you have to stand in respect. And also you seal this covenant in blood by cutting off a part of your body. thats hardcore say less.

Don't forget that the only acceptable way to dispose of the scrolls is by burying them, as if they were a person, and that every year we dance with them as if they were a member of the community.

I'm revoking your bagel privileges

guy currently hurtling toward a migraine at a rate that would impress most astrophysicists: i wonder wgat is happening in my beautiful telephone