one day at a time

"OCD is looking to pull you in to the cycle, down the rabbit hole As you cut compulsions, don’t try and work it out, feel the discomfort, give up inner control and become generally more accepting in life…you glide over the hole OCD tries to suck you down. In your mind it feels exactly like this, a gliding over, not a locking."

"The common social media term “Escaping the matrix” has similarities with OCD. The more people say “They want to escape the matrix” they are in fact creating another matrix they are trapped within. Whatever we internally resist, persists. If all our focus is on escaping, we are creating another layer of internal control and fear, this becomes our prison."

"💭 “But I can’t accept myself if those were my true intentions, my true self in the past” OCD knows you can’t be certain about how you felt in the past, that’s why it’s latching there. You can however move towards accepting yourself even if those were your true intentions. A desire at the time doesn’t write us off in totality, and desires aren’t as scary as we imagine, we catastrophise them."

"The OCD recovery journey has many false dawns. I experienced multiple moments where I thought I’d never experience chronic anxiety again, but waiting just around the corner was a heavy setback. It wasn’t until I had a much better understanding of acceptance & embodied it in most areas of my life did OCD finally back down longer term. Today it has been many years since I experienced chronic anxiety & guilt, my mental framework has changed, OCD can’t flourish like it once did, this is recovery."

"You need to get used to “Not knowing” you will never achieve 100 percent certainty on anything. “Uncertainty is an uncomfortable position. But certainty is an absurd one" - Voltaire. This doesn’t mean recovery is just getting comfortable with uncertainty alone, it’s usually not as simplistic as that, but you need to stop chasing “I need to know I am definitely…or definitely not…” that is a futile pursuit."

"Q: I’m scared to see “Barbie” in case it triggers my HOCD? A: If you are scared of feeling a sensation when watching any Film or TV show, it’s a good exposure! Recovery involves getting comfortable with any sensation or thought. You don’t have to like the thought, sensation, Film or TV show but you need to get used to sitting with the discomfort."

"Q: If you were starting the recovery journey today what would you do differently? A: Not confess, stop venting, cut compulsions quicker, don’t avoid exposures & don’t waste time ruminating over the past as it never brings relief."

"Fear of being uncertain is often a subtle fear of fear."

"“I just want it gone for good” is one of the reasons you are stuck. As we turn up internal control, OCD tightens it’s grip."

"There is a big difference between living and existing. During the years stuck, I existed, made it through the day. Living was a freedom to take pleasure in daily activities, without guilt pulling me down."

"Recovery takes this kind of attitude “I’m going to work today on recovery, no matter how I feel, no matter how hard OCD hits, how real it feels, I’m taking back my life & this is top priority.” Today gets results, tomorrow never does."

"A way to motivate yourself in life is to think about what you don’t want your life to look like. Start with a life spent doing compulsions, do you want that? This can easily happen! Many people never give up compulsions, this is incredibly sad but a fact of reality. This doesn’t have to be you! Start today by doing everything you can to change that future from happening. Your habits each day form your life, really think about that."

"When stuck with ROCD it is important to remember- -Constantly venting to your partner usually puts a strain on the relationship. -Try and have compassion for your partners during the OCD struggle, it’s not easy understanding OCD when you don’t have it. -Partners are not obligated to understand OCD, they are human and will naturally get frustrated at times particularly if they are the center of compulsions."

"OCD thrives in an internal mental architecture made up of- -Strong black and white rigid beliefs -Low frustration tolerance -Demanding things MUST be a certain way -Holding tons of irrational beliefs very strongly -Inability to sit with any uncertainty"

"There is nothing that needs to change externally for you to be at peace. That means you don’t need your friends and family to approve of you, you don’t need life to give you exactly what you want, you can be at peace right now with things being exactly as they are. It took me a long time to realised this, it was the key to mental freedom."

"“I’m just a kind of private person, don’t like to be on social media, or post photos of myself that’s all” often what this means where OCD is concerned- I’m scared of losing control and being judged, I would rather play it super safe and miss out on lots of things for that additional safety. This is usually rigidly defended, but think about it."

"Common avoidance compulsions & comfort traps- - “I’m just an introvert” avoiding everyone in society can often feel more comfortable, particularly where social anxiety is involved. The problem with detaching from everything in life, we tend to miss out on so many great things. - “I’m just a gamer and like to spend my time gaming” gaming can be a good way to unwind at times, but quickly sucks away time whilst giving very little return. Even if you have lots of friends online, gaming rarely leads to real world goals being accomplished. When suffering from OCD gaming can offer some short term distraction and relief but tends to fuel a life structure that doesn’t accommodate OCD recovery. - “I’m just a homebody” Home is comfortable and gives a feeling of safe, that is primarily the attraction. There is nothing wrong with liking to spend time at home but remember, we have one life, do you want to look back at it and think most of it was spent watching Netflix on the couch? This isn’t usually most people’s goals, but it’s easy to convince ourselves of this when comfort chasing."