you have to be cold to be queen

It was bad enough that she had come to Violet Wilkes’ Midsummer Night’s Fire celebration as Lucius’s plus one (like she would ever let him attend this alone despite the hostile glances from the Wilkes family), but it was a whole other thing to lose Lucius. She had been sticking to his side, feeling very uncomfortable to be Narcissa Black at Violet Wilkes’ home, and to remind Violet that Lucius was hers but then he had mentioned going to speak with someone and never returned. It was leaving her feeling very vulnerable and Narcissa didn’t do vulnerable. 

And the matter of Lucius disappearing was entirely concerning. Where was he? She didn’t want to look too concerned, she didn’t know who was watching her, but she felt a pit in her stomach. She kept telling herself that he probably ran into someone from the Ministry and he was just getting caught up, but she couldn’t even see him anywhere. 

Wandering through the crowds of people, she was incredibly relieved to see Sirius standing a few feet away, looking rather bored with his current company. She went straight to him and gently put a hand on his arm. “I’m so sorry but I need to borrow my cousin for a moment,” she said with her Black family smile and pulled him to the side. “Have you seen Lucius?” She asked in a hushed whisper, looking around to make sure that they weren’t being overheard.

There was nothing that could take away from her happiness today. Adeline had wanted her to help with the event and Mr. Malfoy had seemed pleased with her so she really had no complaints. She had showed both of them that she would be a wonderful asset to the family once Lucius finally proposed. She wasn’t even letting the lack of a ring dull her happiness today. 

Scotch in hand, she found Lucius, finally alone, and beamed at him. She leaned up, kissing him and looking at their guests approvingly. “I’ve been looking for you! I figured that you could use a refill,” she told him, handing his glass. She had her own glass of champagne that she was drinking, she detested Scotch, but knew that he didn’t mind it.  

“Your mother did a wonderful job planning everything,” she complimented, hoping that he would compliment her for helping and pass along her regards to his mother, too.

Narcissa had been overjoyed when Adeline had asked her to assist in the planning of the Malfoy’s Midsummer brunch. She had arrived early and in good spirits, ready to help Lucius’s mother with whatever she needed to make sure that the event ran smoothly. After all, she was going to be her daughter-in-law eventually and she didn’t want her to have any complaints. It was difficult for her to reign herself in a bit, not wanting to overstep, even though Adeline was a wonderful woman who would never say anything, she was sure. But she didn’t want her to have any reason to say anything about her. 

Walking through the crowd, mingling with the guests, she had a big smile on her face. This was exactly what she had wanted, after all. Spotting a familiar face that she hadn’t managed to greet yet, she made a beeline for them.

“You look wonderful! How are you enjoying the brunch?”

The space he lived in was hardly that. Regulus spent as much time as he could in his own place, but it didn’t look lived in. Perhaps someone who was passing through or expecting to be somewhere else. He didn’t take full advantage of being on his own, thinking that his mother still had her hand on Regulus from afar. It had been some persuasion but it was his father who complied, thinking that Regulus should be his own person and be a man as he was the heir of the family now. Living alone and getting his own personal space between his parents meant moving on and being more fulfilled. The only thing Regulus had done to the place was get a bookshelf to hold his books. 

“If you wish to decorate you can. I haven’t done much with it and I believe I will be here for a while. Perhaps a picture or two would be better than staring at a blank wall.” He trusted Narcissa’s eye for such things and would invite her to do any decorating that she pleased. “Has Malfoy been nice to you? I would sincerely hope that nothing is tense between the two of you. I am glad that you came and perhaps we can both relax. There has been a large influx of activity at work which has kept me busy. I have enjoyed the added pace though. I got lunch with Sirius which was…comforting. I do believe we can make it work.”

Narcissa felt a smile form on her lips at his invitation to decorate his flat. “You just made me very happy, Reg,” she told him with a laugh. “This place will look incredible when I’m through. And I promise I won’t go too overboard. But you need something to make this place look like a home, Reg. You can’t leave the walls blank forever.” She shook her head. Sometimes she didn’t understand Reg, although she loved him dearly. He was a Black, it meant that he could have whatever he wanted, do whatever he wanted. And he chose to work in that little shop downstairs and keep his space bare. “I’m going to have so much fun with this, i’ve been looking for a new project,” she said with a laugh. 

However her smile turned into a slight frown when he asked if Lucius had been nice to her. What did he know? Who was talking? She had thought that they had kept their fight rather quiet. “Of course he is,” she replied. “He bought me this necklace. Isn’t it beautiful?” She asked him. But then she faltered. “Why? What did you hear? What are people saying?” She asked, looking at him. She trusted Regulus to tell her the truth. She knew he wouldn’t lie to her. “I’m glad too. How is work going? Are you still enjoying it?” She asked him, curious about the shop downstairs. She raised an eyebrow. “You had lunch with Sirius? How did it go?” 

There were many reasons why Regulus was looking forward to getting back into work. For the most part, he could only understand that his boss wasn’t favoring the many absences. It wasn’t usual for Regulus to go away for so long and then to put everything on pause. He had only told his parents about his trip to Flint’s and then everyone else who knew was already there. Regulus didn’t have that many friends and the one brother he did have only just recently came back into his life. If there was anything he could do right, it was throwing himself into his practice. 

Regulus was dedicated to his work enough that his apartment was directly located above the shop. It was a place that felt entirely his which was something that he rarely was equipped with. After the Black event, he had hoped to see Narcissa again. There seemed to be a conversation that wasn’t quite done. He heard a knock at the door and stepped over, opening to beam at Narcissa. “I’m doing well, how are you?” he greeted his cousin, mirroring the gesture. “Please pardon the mess.” The place was minimal but with a few subtle messes. It really only housed Regulus for sleeping and eating, spending most of his time out and about. “How has your week been going? Please tell me this isn’t the highlight.”

Narcissa was a little bit jealous that Regulus had been allowed to move out and get his own place. She couldn’t wait to have her own place to decorate and do what she wanted with  But her mother insisted that pureblood young women didn’t live alone, at least daughters of the house of Black didn’t. It wasn’t fair, Regulus got to, but her mother reminded her that Regulus was a man and got to do as he wanted. Her mother’s ideas were terribly sexist, but there was no use, her parents were unmoving on the issue. She sometimes wondered if the loss of Andromeda had caused them to keep her even closer. But no matter, she could visit Regulus and enjoy the freedom that was being at his flat. 

She was happy to see him. “Very well,” she replied, stepping into his flat, a shake of her head as he apologized for the mess. “Please, you barely have anything in here, Reg! We need to get you some decorations or something,” she told him with a kind smile. Regulus was one of the only people that got to see this side of her, she trusted him inherently and knew that she could be herself with him. “My week has been good. I’ve spent some time with Lucius, which has been nice. I brought him lunch and we ate in his office the other day. And mother has kept me busy this week, between seeing you and Lucius, it feels like I haven’t been out at all. How about you? Tell me that you’re not just working.”

Lucius exhaled a breath that he hadn’t realised he was holding. He was only slowly realising just how much he enjoyed making Narcissa happy and how much his own mood was affected when she was upset with him. There were few people whose opinions mattered to him and apparently Narcissa was one of them. It shouldn’t have been surprising given that he had chosen her to be his partner. 

“Well so do you if you like the pieces I chose,” he said. He’d even picked them out himself instead of having a personal shopper do it for him. 

“It is definitely a surprise,” he said. Of everything he had expected to happen at the party that evening the return of Sirius Black had not been it. There hadn’t been so much as a whisper that it was coming, no hint that he had turned his back on his muggle loving life. “You must be happy that he has returned to the fold.”

Narcissa smiled at him. Of course, she had good taste, she had picked him, after all, hadn’t she? She was starting to realize that relationships were more complicated than she had expected, but they would work out, she was sure. They were going to be stronger after all of this fighting, she was sure. She had made him see what life would be like without her, and it was clear that he didn’t like it, he had come back after all. 

“Of course I do,” she said. “I chose you,” she told him softly, looking up to meet his eyes. “And I would every time.” 

“It was a surprise when Grandfather told me that he was returning,” she said carefully. She sighed. “I had been just dying to tell you, Grandfather had made me swear not to tell anyone, but if we hadn’t been fighting...” she trailed off, knowing that he would realize what she was saying. “But that doesn’t matter now, the secret is out. I’m glad that he finally realized the error of his ways. He seems like he has his head on straight, that he’s dedicated to the family again. I’m happy.” 

“There will always be more galas,” Briar nodded, and with a mischievous grin, she added, “And I’ll just have to dazzle at the next one to make up for my absence.” It wouldn’t be hard, and a good public appearance would quiet her mother long enough to let her have her own fun for a decent amount of time after. She was anxious to get the woman off her back, and an even with Narcissa might just do the trick.

“I’m glad that you agree! Our joined forces will surely make history,” she smiled, her mind already whirring with how she could explain things to Violet, keeping both girls in the dark just enough to not arouse suspicion. “A trip would be lovely.” She gushed, “I’m sure the usual places are positively lovely.” At the comment about topping Narcissa’s Grandfather’s ball, Briar’s eyes twinkled. “I’ve always loved a good challenge.”

Narcissa nodded. “Yes. There will be plenty,” she said in agreement.  The spring season was already starting and there would be plenty of teas and galas to attend over the next few months. Spring was one of her favorite seasons. She laughed and gave Briar a genuine smile. “Oh, you will dazzle for sure. You deserve it,” she said. She personally didn’t want Briar to dazzle more than she did, but she wouldn’t hold it against her. Narcissa just liked to be the best of everything. 

“Oh yes, we will absolutely make history. With your planning skills and my eye for detail and contacts it will be the best,” She said. Narcissa liked the thought of planning something with Briar, it would be another way to get back at her for causing her to quarrel with Lucius. “Yes. I know that we are just returning from the estate but I already feel like I need a trip,” she admitted. She laughed. “Good. Because it’s going to be a challenge I’m sure.”

Camille made a note to see if she could get some information from Lucius about his future plans, although she had few doubts that Narcissa was right. It would be foolish to go about spouting things like that if the future weren’t settled. “Relaxed is a good word,” she said, nodding. It had been a nice reprieve - if only because the house was large enough that she could sneak away when people were annoying. She did not look forward to returning to England and how annoying things were there, but she couldn’t do much about it. “Well then, obviously I will need your assistance to maneuver through it all.” At least she could be sure that Narcissa would know how to do that well; the Black family had a reputation after all. “I’ll be wanting some new dresses, and I’m sure you can direct me to the best shop for that.”

Narcissa offered Camille a smile. She would have to speak with Lucius to learn more about his cousin. She felt that there was more information to gather on her, and she would have to do so before she went further with her friendship. But she also knew that once she married Lucius she would have no choice in the matter. “Yes. I’ve spent plenty of time with Lucius walking through the gardens and such,” she said. “Have any of the men caught your eye?” She questioned with a smirk. She wanted to try and get a feel for the other woman. She nodded her head. “Yes, of course. I’m always happy to help,” she said. “Some would send you to Madam Malkins, but to be perfectly honest with you, her clothing is rather...pedestrian. You must go to Twilfit and Tatting or Cecilie Morel, their clothing is far superior,” she explained. 

Regulus was the only person who could get her to come down this part of Diagon Alley. It wasn’t the popular part of the shopping district, and she rarely came down this way. But it was where Regulus lived and she loved him and preferred to spend time with him away from the Manor and her mother. There was more freedom, spending time together at his flat versus the manor, where her mother tended to hover and listen to their conversations. It was utterly annoying. She was looking forward to seeing Regulus, however, and any annoyance about the part of Diagon Alley that he lived in ultimately didn’t matter.

Knocking on the door, she waited for him to answer, looking down at her outfit. She was wearing one of the apology pieces that Lucius had given her after their fight, a beautiful necklace that she was quite fond of. She was curious to see Regulus, to hear if he had seen his brother. Perhaps she was a bit nosey, but she thought that she deserved to know how things were going. When the door opened, she was glad to see him. 

“Regulus,” she said, smiling and kissing his cheek. “How are you?”

Although it helped, Camille wasn’t of the belief that expense necessarily equaled quality. But she would keep that to herself, and instead nodded placidly. And no doubt in this case, the expenses the Black family took care of would help make the party a success. “That would no doubt be very helpful,” she said. Knowing what was coming and what she ought to be more invested in would be invaluable. And as much as she was ambivalent about Narcissa, if the girl did end up married to Lucius, then it wouldn’t do to have cut her ties there. “I would be very grateful for your assistance. Being here has been helpful - not so tied to everything British, but returning to England will be a different story, no doubt.”

Narcissa liked the idea of helping Lucius’s cousin in theory, it showed her desire to help the Malfoys and that she wanted to be family with them. But sometimes it was tiring. She never knew what to make of Camille. She seemed like a proper Pureblood, and Narcissa was sure that she was, but everything just seemed so...shallow and on the surface when she talked with her. She would have liked to get to know her better, but there seemed to be a bit of a wall there. But no doubt, Narcissa would figure her out eventually. “You know that I’m happy to help. Lucius’s family is mine as well,” she said. That she was sure of. She would be married to him sooner than later. “It has been rather relaxed here, don’t you think? I’ve enjoyed the break from England, but you’re right that things will be different when we get home. There are so many events to attend and people to see.” 

Antonin knew he could have hidden his past, could have hidden his origins as easily as he hid the business he ran. But he had never wanted his upbringing to be a weapon his opponents could use against him and so he wore it like armor, a shield against those who would see harm come to him. And, if he was being honest, he was not entirely pleased with the government in his native land; his mother and her family had been monarchists, though they’d kept that a secret during the revolution. “I would agree with you there,” he said with a chuckle before taking another sip of his drink. Englishmen seemed proud, more proud than Russians who would allow others to take what was rightfully theirs. “It is one of the reasons I’m pleased to be here for now.” He shrugged a shoulder. “Perhaps. Or perhaps they will be taken over by another government that is stronger. All I know is that Russia will not be my home for much longer.” He intended to return only when he could rise to the top of the Russian aristocracy.

She was right – it certainly was cliché, though he was much too polite to say such things. “Paris is a lovely city.” His tone was agreeable, even as he disliked the words coming out of his mouth and Antonin contented himself with the knowledge that he was making a valuable connection. “Do you have a great deal of family in France?” he inquired, curious as to how far the Black family network truly extended. He nodded. “I certainly look forward to it, well, what I can fit in between my work schedule of course.” He would never delegate all of his responsibilities to subordinates. Nodding, Antonin found himself wondering just how Lucius Malfoy was satisfied with a woman who seemed rather shallow; of course, he would not say that either. “There can be something good in doing something new,” he agreed, as he looked up at the sky. “I believe I might see some of the greens now.” He pointed ahead.

Narcissa smiled. “Well, we are happy to have you in England,” she said. It certainly made things more interesting, having Antonin Dolohov around. It made it more exciting, having someone with different thoughts and ideas around. She was curious about what her father would make of him, she would have to speak with him when they returned home. “Sometimes it gets so boring talking to the same people every night,” She said conspiratorially like she was telling him something top secret. Narcissa knew how to play the Pureblood game, her mother had taught her well, and she had thrived. But it did get boring, talking to the same people with the same ideas. “True. The strongest person or, well, government in this case, usually wins and sets all the rules.” That had been how it had been at Hogwarts, on a much lesser scale. She was used to it. 

She had always just been drawn to Paris, even if it was a complete cliche. The clothing and food there was wonderful and she loved walking around the city. It was her happy place. “It is. But I enjoy the south of France as well. I suppose I’m partial to the entire country,” she said. Narcissa nodded. “Well, we’re related to the Rosiers on my Mother’s side,” she explained. “My Grandmother on that side lives in France. And then there are some Black cousins who live there as well.” And if she had her way, she would have family on the Malfoy side there as well, although she wasn’t quite certain about the French Malfoys. “I’m sure your work keeps you quite busy,” she commented. “I like to keep myself busy with my work with the orphanage in England and with a few other charities that I work with,” she explained. “Yes,” she agreed. She turned her gaze to the sky. “It’s beautiful,” she commented. 

“I suppose you have.” Sirius doesn’t know enough about their relationship to substantially comment on it, so who’s he to disagree with what Narcissa wants? “I hope things come to fruition soon then, dear cousin. You shouldn’t be kept waiting, especially after waiting so long already.” He offers her another Sirius Black smile, charming and full of life, before letting it fade slightly. “You’ll have to keep me posted on that dinner arrangement.” 

Sirius doesn’t know what he wants these days. As the Black heir, he should be chasing after it, she’s right, but what’s there to chase after now that he’s left his life behind him? He needs to find a new goal, and quickly. Someone, something – he needs to be seen as determined and goal-oriented. It’s one of the only ways to command the respect of these people. He needs to be as ambitious as every snake in this room. He keeps those thoughts tucked away though, determined not to let anyone know the truth. “Don’t worry, Narcissa. I still intend to get what I want. No one can deny a Black.” He keeps his tone light and teasing, fully aware of how cryptic that sounded. His smile softened as she complimented him. Despite his resentments towards his family and this life, it warms him to be welcomed back with open arms by Narcissa. “Thank you, Narcissa. That means a great deal.” His voice is soft and genuine. 

He chuckles as he’s caught up on the gossip, eyes scanning the room and seeking out each individual she mentions. They’re almost all here, which is good. He’ll need an edge when speaking with them and knowing the latest gossip certainly helps. It’ll be awhile before he’s caught up on everyone’s affairs, but he can certainly try. He tsks and turns his attention back to Narcissa. “I always liked Audrey. What a shame.” He doesn’t know who’s side of the engagement it’s more fashionable to be on, but he has a feeling Narcissa will correct him if he’s wrong. 

It was nice to feel like someone was listening. Lucius certainly wasn’t at the moment. It was frustrating, but she would push through. She hadn’t gotten this far to let it all fall apart. “Me too,” she said. “I’m sure he’s just waiting for the right moment, you know?” She said. That was what she kept telling herself anyways. She nodded her head. “Of course, I will let you know when Lucius is free for dinner. The Minister keeps him so busy, but i’m sure that he can sneak away one of these nights.” 

Narcissa would never understand wanting to put all of this behind you, leaving the family name and wealth behind. The Black family and the name lead to so many different opportunities that Narcissa relished in. She would never understand Andromeda’s choice to leave it all behind to marry a muggleborn. Did Andromeda not have the ambition to want better for herself, rather than having worse? Narcissa couldn’t imagine being poor and having nothing. She enjoyed this life too much. She loved the clothes, the parties, the wealth. She didn’t think that there was anything wrong with that. It seemed that Sirius had finally come to his senses when he chose to return. “Good,” she said approvingly. It was starting to feel like she would have to help coach him back to his proper place in life, but it was a job that she was more than equipped to handle. “And you’re right. Nobody can deny a Black,” she agreed. Even if he was teasing, she hoped that he knew that he could have the world if he asked for it. “Of course,” she smiled.

“Me too,” she said, shaking her head. “I’m not sure what got into Rabastan. He’s nothing like Rodolphus,” she said with a shrug. She looked at him and then looked around, realizing that she had been taking up too much of his time. “I should let you get back to mingling and catching up,” She told him. “But let’s have lunch, yes? We need another place to catch up. Without so many prying eyes,” she told him. She spotted Lucius speaking with someone several feet away. She needed to get back to teasing him.

“I want it to be right, Narcissa,” he said. He hadn’t had to put into words why he hadn’t proposed yet. He knew his parents had wondered but he wasn’t yet old enough that they would pry or put pressure on him - so long as he seemed to be on the right track. His own father had been far older when he had married. After the Violet debacle they were also keen to avoid another scandal in case he changed his mind. He had made it clear that it was one area where he would do what he wanted rather than what they expected of him. “I would hate for our happiness to be overshadowed by something like, well, this.” 

A tension he hadn’t realised he was holding in his chest released when she kissed his cheek. He had really disliked feeling like she was mad at him. 

“You were probably right,” he agreed, even if he had been trying to avoid just that very thing by sending her the gifts. But it hadn’t been as terrible as he had expected. There might have been a lesson about communication there. “If you would still like them I have kept them all. I can have them delivered to the Manor.”

“I do too,” she agreed. But what wasn’t right about right now? She was never going to understand him. She realized that she needed to try and be patient, but patience wasn’t her strong suit. And she felt like she deserved more than him just saying that he wanted it to be right. But clearly, he didn’t think so considering their fight, which she definitely didn’t want to relive. Narcissa realized that her behavior had been offputting and now she needed to double down and show him just why he wanted to marry her. “No, you are quite right,” she said in agreement. “I don’t want our happiness to be ruined by our silly argument either. It’s in the past now, and I respect your decision.” There, if she showed him that she respected him then perhaps he would show her the same courtesy. 

“Aren’t I always?” Narcissa questioned with a laugh, a teasing smile on her lips. At his offer, she nodded her head. “I would love that. I will gladly wear them. It was so hard for me to send them back, you have wonderful taste in jewelry,” she complimented. 

“So,” she started, looking up at him. “What did you think of my Grandfather’s surprise?” She asked. She found Sirius across the room and watched him for a moment. He seemed sincere, seemed happy to be back. But a part of her was certainly unsure. But she trusted her Grandfather, knew that he would never do something to harm the family again.