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Sometimes the small pleasures hit different. A clean house, a hot drink, making something from scratch, sitting on the porch with a loved one. Little soul-feeding activities.

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poorly-drawn-mdzs

Left for a week and almost missed the historic event of Tumblr Sexyman Final Voting.

asmrgaret

it’s weird that professional letters are supposed to start with “dear.” i don’t even call my mom that

asmrgaret

my darling hiring manager. my springtime rose. if hired i will bring a strong work ethic to this position

contourkit-deactivated20160224

What if everything gets better in 2016

melonisopod

phantomrose96

There's a muscle in the shoulder I've been noticing. It appears when I hinge my arm and lift it upward, like I'm sporting water-wings or like I'm throwing an illicit elbow on the soccer field. The muscle shows itself best with modest shadow. It is a polite and subtle declaration. I flap like a chicken in the mirror to watch the muscle, and the cat doesn't mind.

There's a bone in the shoulder I've been noticing on celebrities. It sits where my muscle does--and her muscle does, presumably--but her muscle has made work of unbuilding itself from view. For the bone's sake. The bone eats shadows and gargles them before it's done with them. The red carpet loves shadows. The red carpet loves bones. The red carpet loves tired women.

There is a Chewy box outside. I heft it in a grip slightly awkward and jump it up 3 flights of stairs. My hold is somewhat awkward, I think, as I set it down beside the cat who more than happily minds this box. I tear the packaging with key-teeth and note before the flap inverts that the box is marked 49lbs. It didn't feel 49lbs. I use my shoulder muscle and chicken-wing grip to jaunt the full cat litter one-handed to its place while my cat licks the unopened food bag. The motion is easy.

Those who make velvet marks of their high-heeled toes on the red carpet and those who heft Chewy boxes up triple-decker walk-ups are mutually exclusive groups. I imagine anyway the celebrity with all the fuck-you money in the world, and all the access to gyms and personal trainers and nutritionists and fitness plans, squatting heels-flat and grip-cupped to my Chewy box. I think that shoulder bone would writhe under taut skin like my cat shoving her hopeless face against the tiny opening from inside her cat carrier. I think the muscles would strain and the bones would hush them. I think the Chewy box would never move.

I want to lift Chewy boxes for another 40 years.

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podcastwizard

gonna be honest folks it was a lot easier for me to go to work when i was more depressed because i didn't really care how i spent my day. now i'm worried the morning sunlight is going to touch my face at just the right angle and i'll be putting in my two weeks before i've walked through the front door

pukicho

If you’re anxious, don’t worry.

thyboylovethgaming

if you're having an asthma attack, just breathe.

pukicho

Exactly queen #I-am-a-normal-person-with-no-problems

tabloidsores

Two dudes in my group chat have been playing league & slowly but surely have shifted from saying "wanna play league of legends" to "wanna play some geego legends". At this point their average post is just @ing the other and going "geegogagand?" and I feel insane

tabloidsores

What is going on

7kqe3j9fzdwm-deactivated2025110

! this user loves illegal immigration, abortions, and sex change operations !

starglowy

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bisexualbaker

Happy Moon Landing Eve! Remember to leave out milk and cookies for Buzz Aldrin and Neil Armstrong, and don’t let Michael Collins convince you to prank NASA!

not-your-average-url

I miss when ads were a single click and then they’re gone. Now every ad has a minimum of three phases where you watch a video, exit the still frame of fake gameplay, and then exit the app download. That doesn’t even touch on the ones that forcibly take you to another app after opening a tab in safari without you ever touching the screen.

I hate advertising. I hate that you can’t do anything without companies jumping down your throat with mostly bullshit ads. I hate that billboards exist. I hate that every company unanimously decided to make their ads longer and longer. I hate that ad blockers try to charge you money and there are in app purchases to remove ads. I hate that my attention has become commodified. I hate that there’s nothing I can do about it.

hitmyvape

Actually embarrassing I have to send this text to the work gc

#liamcore

aberrantemotion

Always funny to me when indie devs who already sell games for dirt cheap participate in steam sales with like 90 percent off. Like. "Yeah this game is three dollars but you can have it for one right now." Like your game costs as much as a pack of m&ms and youre selling it for the cost of a pack of m&ms in the 1950s now? Okay

reddherring777

i plan to keep making noises until I die

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memories-of-ancients

Fished shaped cosmetics container, Egypt, 18th Dynasty, circa 1500-1292 BC

from The Egyptian Museum, Cairo

#adaro

2colde

i love leaning into a bad feeling #mytwistingknife

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