The Awesome Bobby

admittedly i know little of the subject but one would think, at 45 years of age, he would be a ryan goose by now

imagine if i did my work. if i sat down and Did it. and it was Done. can you even imagine such a thing

Started using the phrase “that’s cilantro to me” to refer to the presence of a story element that completely ruins a piece of media for me, disproportionate to its actual badness.

Do not cite the Deep Magic to me, witch. I wasn't listening when it was being written down and I am also not listening now.

I'm imagining a fortune teller who's also a child so her idea of what a good fate is vs a terrible one isn't really in line with her clients at all

Imagine u go to visit the oraclet (oracling?) and she tells u there's untold riches in your future and later it becomes very apparent that what she was predicting was you winning $20 from a lottery ticket

She dismisses every wedding she predicts as a Terrible Fate because she thinks the kissing is cringe

[ID: pictures of a red clay sculpture of two horse heads embracing. Sculpture shows their heads up till their shoulders and the start of their back. They are resting their heads on the back of the other. Both have their eyes closed. Each picture shows a different angle. End ID]

no way dude no way. there's just no way

i love explaining the etymology of the word "rickroll" because the story starts with "ok, so at one point 4chan applied a filter to everyone's posts that changed the word egg to duck"

knowing how it tends to go with male authors and their wives it was probably marge who wrote the odyssey

I can tell my evil advisor has been feeling down lately so I've been pretending to take big sips from his cursed chalice and then roaming the palace grounds groaning and clutching my abdomen. Lowkey I know it's deceptive but I can tell it's really cheering him up. I heard him evilly cackle for the first time in weeks. WIBTA if I keep doing this