SHES RISING

So pre season 1 (before Jon’s even works in the archives but in a different department) there’s an archives Christmas party or something and Martin gets very drunk and ends up sitting in the back away from everyone and meets Jon and the two spend the night talking. Jon’s socially awkward but Martin is sweet and adorable and doesn’t mind when he info dumps and just Jon is hit with an instacrush and at the end of the night gives Martin his number and Martin gives him his.

He ends up texting him the next day making sure he’s ok and info dumping and working himself up into asking on a date because he really likes him and oh he’s fucked how does he do this like a normal person

Martin however, is a blackout drunk and when he wakes up in the morning he can’t remember anything after the first drink with his colleges and then maybe someone mentions him talking to a weird guy who they’re pretty sure wasn’t with their party cause he was in some tiny corner all night (and who they think looked kind of old) and then sees texts from an unknown number the last one asking him out and he’s so embarrassed he just blocks the number because this is to embarrassing he was hitting on some random old dude all night, oh god kill him now.

Jon on the other hand has no idea Martin can’t remember and as soon as he asks him out just suddenly his numbers and blocked and is confused.

Not to much later he’s prompted and there’s Martin again only he introduces himself like they’ve never met and Jon is snippy and sharp and still really hurt and is not convinced he’s actually this sweet because if so why did he…

Only of course he still falls again and Martin has his crush.

Then Martin finds out, either in the safe house Jon admitting it or in earlier while they’re still working in the archives together like he gets Jon’s number and wait why do i already have this number? whys it blocked? why….what? OH GOD!

We still had the drive to create. We still sold prints and charms and made zines…but it was never like this.

The introduction of streaming, binge shows that drop all at once, tiktok and vine RIP i still love u vine but you were the beginning of a particularly ugly era) creating this bite sized, quick paced ‘content’ era of creation and it bled out into fucking everything else.

Fandoms didn’t die down when the show ended or the season was over. You didn’t mass unfollow artist, writers or moots just because they changed fandoms. There wasn’t this need to please the algorithm in order for your posts to get seen by people and enjoyed.

Fandoms used to last YEARS. Star Trek is literally the oldest running fandom out there and you got people in there that could care less about the new stuff and still have been happily prancing through their fucking fifty year old fandom today. Hell, even SPN after all it’s fuckups and shitshows has a dedicated fanbase STILL creating tons of art and fic.

There is no patience anymore. No calm feeling of taking in fandom and friends at a pace that which doesn’t make you stressed and is still fun.

Do I blame fandom for this? Of course not, but people are complacent with it and start changing their vocab to accommodate and end up making the situation so deep it cant be fixed.

I'm in the business of atrophy.

My Neopets exist, and persist, and are dying and continue to die for the last ten years my account has been dark. My penguin lived until the day Club Penguin died, immobile in its igloo, decoration among the puffles. My Webkinz stand in rooms which time refuses to allow even the dignity of gathering dust. My footprint stuffs the digital shelves of datacenters for sites and accounts I do not remember making.

He must have felt so...alone.

Or maybe i just like drawing lonely people at their lonely moments.