this shit ain't nothing to me, man. i'm rolling different.
One Nice Bug Per Day
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

gracie abrams
Today's Document
$LAYYYTER



shark vs the universe

titsay
d e v o n
Misplaced Lens Cap

blake kathryn

★
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

Discoholic 🪩
TVSTRANGERTHINGS

Kiana Khansmith
𓃗
almost home
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@ches-nogat
this shit ain't nothing to me, man. i'm rolling different.

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I just Liked a glass of water and Reblogged it to my stomach
i need someone to explain to me when to use who vs. whom as if they're explaining it to a toddler, because brother i just do not get it
he hates this yaoi shit so much
(of course based on this dialogue)
facesitting is top tier because you dont even really have to put in that much effort. if a girl is being bratty while youre playing a game you can push me down and sit on my face and then continue playing for the next hour or so
her

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Going through some major life struggles which means it's time to bust out the burgerpants stress drawing
i bet the pain will end if i arrange a perfect enough sentence about it
*wriggling around in the lizard's den* i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i’m so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute. i'm so cute.
id lie right to willy wonkas face. “did you drink fizzy lifting drinks” of course not. And then id hit him
This is why you won't inherit the factory.
i dont want the factory. I want to see fear in his eyes

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(to the tune of working on the railroad) iiive been working on the railrooad
in front of you there are two bottles of poison. one of them is green and is labeled "green poison" and the other is purple and labeled "purple poison".
which bottle of poison will you drink?
the green poison
the purple poison
I will not be drinking either bottle of poison
Youtube video demonstrating The Grapefruit Method where I begin by saying "I think every man should get grapefruited" but as you continue watching it becomes more and more clear that I don't actually know how to perform oral sex and the video is in fact some kind of manifesto-style announcement of my intent to make a bunch of guys accidentally overdose on their medication.
#this post goes especially hard because i have no fucking clue what the Grapefruit Method is
You are one of today's exceedingly unlucky 10000.
#holy shit she gets loud as fuck sucking on that thing#now i know why it's called “sloppy” toppy#this doesn't clarify anything to me about making men overdose on their meds but that's ok cuz i still agree regardless
It's not okay actually that one you should probably know about as a matter of like, public health messaging.
One legitimately weird thing about Tumblr is that we literally can’t code for shit, many people quit working at Tumblr due to a hostile work environment, and we can’t seem to program a simple blogging website to not flood your RAM.
Suddenly struck with a need to explain to you how boat pronouns work (I work in the marine industry).
When you're talking about the design of the boat, you say "it".
When the boat is still being built, your say "it".
When the boat is nearing completion, you can say "it" or "she".
When the boat is floating in the water you probably say "she", unless there is still a lot of work to be done (e.g. no engine yet) then you say "it".
When the boat is officially launched and operating, you say "she". If you continue to say "it" at this point you are not incorrect but suspiciously untraditional. You are not playing the game.
If you are referring to a boat you don't really know anything about you may say "it" ("there's a big boat, it's coming this way"). But if you know its name, it's probably "she" ("there's the Waverley, she's on her way to Greenock").
If you are talking about boats in general, you say "it" ("when a boat is hit by a wave it heels over")
If you speak about a boat in complimentary terms, it's "she" ("she's a grand boat"). If you are being disparaging it may be it, but not necessarily ("it's as ugly as sin", "she's a grotty old tub").
If she has a boy's name, she's still she. "Boy James", "King Edward", "Sir David Attenborough"? The pronoun is she.
If it's a dumb barge (no engine), you say it. But if it's a rowing boat (no engine), you say she.
I hope this has cleared things up so that you may not be in danger of misgendering floating objects.

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(via bsky)
In case anyone hasn't heard, the cyclospora outbreak affecting tons of people in the US right now is coming from Taylor Farms produce. Best to stay away from bagged lettuce and prepared salads completely right now, but especially the ones mentioned in the screenshot:
Taylor Farms Earthbound Farms Little Salad Bar (Aldi) Marketside (Walmart) Kroger House Brand Target private label greens Costco salads and greens etc Trader Joe's chopped salad kits and fresh produce Fast food: McDonalds, Taco Bell, (Yum! Brands), Chipotle, Subway, Pizza Hut, KFC, Olive Garden, Top Golf, Red Lobster, Burger King, etc.
This is not the first time I've heard about a Taylor Farms foodborne illness outbreak. I stopped eating their salads after reading a description of the conditions in their facilities. Doesn't sound like they've improved anything.
We need a fully funded and staffed FDA, and regulations with teeth - and that's exactly what we don't have under Trump. To make things worse, the CDC is no longer tracking these outbreaks. We're on our own.
“we live in an uncaring universe” yeah dude and I live in an uncaring house. and I shit in an uncaring toilet. but do you touch an uncaring lover? do you comfort an uncaring child? do you guide to sleep each night a cold and uncaring self?
please hurry up in reblogging this I wanna jorts it before someone puts it in one of those heartwarming tiktok slideshows
i was like 'what could jorts it possibly mean' but as with many things clicking the original post immediately clarified the situation