Cemetery Teacup

i've got the kind of eyebags that make people in movies say 'you look like hell, detective. go home.'

do you want to play dead bodies with me

floats along your dash face down and quiet and cold

Being an adult will have you unironically craving a vegetable

im going to fix my entire life

i have [gestures vaguely] my tendencies

hopefully i'll get to do something other than endure soon. that would be really nice

work tomorrow is one of the worst things that can happen to you

you solve the mystery of what to have for dinner one night and you think "hell yeah case closed forever" WRONG there is a dinner mystery the next night too

i am not 'cool' or 'hip'. im not the 'bees knees'. i am being chased through a forest by an alien creature just like the rest of you. can somebody call nasa

everything is divine punishment if youre delusional enough

resurrected dead wife watching her own montage: wow I looked so hot in that