Remember when I said I was done with surgeries...
Hey y’all! It’s been way too long. And I’m gonna fully blame it on Maisie. She’s still absolutely crazy. She’s now 2 years and 2 months... and that’s almost how long I’ve been feeling ill. It started in pregnancy: nausea, no appetite, fatigue. But those are all completely normal pregnancy symptoms. But they never went away, just got worse. If you have ever eaten with me, especially at Olive Garden or CiCi’s, you know I can eat a shocking amount. I love food. I used to call my mom at work while eating breakfast every morning and ask, “what’s for dinner?” Now, I’m to the point where I’ll eat ANYthing I can get to even look/sound a smidge enticing. Most of the time, the more I run through my normally favorite foods, the more nauseous I become. Then I’d take a Zofran (anti-nausea) and get bloated/stopped up. Either way, nothing good is ever going on with my stomach. 🤦🏼♀️ So after a physical exam, blood tests, and a belly sonogram this past year, my doctor finally said, we’re done with the easy tests, time for the rough ones. We started listing all my issues, other than the nausea and loss of appetite. Fatigue is a huge one, I can’t take a shower without getting so exhausted, I just can’t wait to get it over with so I can get out and lay down. You guys, being a stay at home mom to a very active toddler is not for the fatigued. 🤦🏼♀️ Anxiety and depression, something I’ve dealt with for quite awhile, but it’s gotten worse. By that I mean more often and intense, and for no apparent reason, while on anti anxiety and anti-depression medications. I then show him my stomach, where I still have a lingering skin infection, something I thought was a heat rash from sleeping on my stomach, I guess sweat just irritates it 🤷🏼♀️ Brain fog, forgetfulness, hair loss, migraines. These are all easily chalked up to my injuries, pregnancy brain, mom brain, postpartum symptoms, all things that didn’t scream, “run to the emergency room already!” But after so long and the symptoms list growing, we had to figure it out before I lost it. Then it hit us, what if my implants are ruptured?! First up, I met with a G.I. Doctor that set me up to get a stomach scope and colonoscopy at the same time 😩 then went to get a mammogram and breast sonogram, which is where I learned my right (silicone) breast implant is ruptured... oh and the molding is mostly in my armpit. Y’all, my anxiety escalated quickly. I immediately googled everything “ruptured silicone implants” and was starting to have a heart attack, or maybe it was a panic attack 🤷🏼♀️ it was bad. The longer you leave a ruptured silicone implant in your body, the more time it has to migrate to other parts of your body. Once it’s in another part, it’s there, there’s no removing it. Within days I had seen my surgeon to go over getting them removed, and the surgery scheduled for January 3rd 2019. While I’m excited to postpone, 🤞🏻maybe cancel all together, that scope and colonoscopy... buuut, I feel like those woulda been way easier than removing my boobs 🙄 Ya live and ya learn. And that’s why we’re here. Seriously, if you are thinking about breast implants, please don’t. I regretted mine within 2 weeks of getting them, and I’d wanted them for as long as I could remember. But sick 34 year old me wants to throat punch 25 year old me, hard. They weren’t worth it. And now I wait 5.5 more days, get the implants and scar tissue capsules removed, and then have family come over while Shea’s at work to help me with Maisie, because I can’t even lift her for 3+ weeks. I’m honestly praying this is the reason behind my sickness, so I can start healing, feel better, and absolutely not go get a scope/colonoscopy. 🙌🏻 Rolling on all the Young Living Tranquil blend and trying to breathe.
