stars are better off without us

i’ve never seen a mouse that looks so much like a mouse before

She looks like she belongs on the cover of a beloved illustrated children’s book 🥺

We need like a month where nothing happens and there's no repercussions we all just stay in bed and hibernate and nothing goes wrong

i love that post thats like “never trust how you feel about your life after 9pm” that shit changed my life. every time i feel bad i look at the clock and i’m like Aha It’s 10:26 PM You Cannot Fucking Fool Me

i condone and support every single vile deed my problematic faves have done. not only that i think they should have done bigger and worse atrocities than already committed. i think that would have been funny

somewhere in the world right now there is a cat making bread and purring. I need you to always remember that 

#actually the funniest moment of the show #CESARE I AM TRYING TO PRAY WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG NOW #um well you see first i banged caterina sforza and then she might have refused to come to rome and i might have killed giovanni sforza #BUT IT WAS TOTALLY JUSTIFIED BECAUSE HE BREATHED LUCREZIA’S AIR I DON’T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND I WAS JUST BEING NORMAL #THAT IS WHAT NORMAL PEOPLE DO DAD #and then rodrigo’s like #oh what the fuck ever god forgives you god always forgives you #you incestuous literal bastard brother-killing fuck #just get out of my sight #WHATEVER #his face in the fourth gif #it’s like the only time he actively regrets something #I DON’T KNOW WHAT CAME OVER ME ONE MINUTE WE WERE FUCKING THE NEXT I WAS DIGGING THROUGH HER COUSIN’S CHEST CAVITY #and rodrigo wishes that he could say this is weird for cesare #but nothing is weird for cesare because he’s cesare

It’s like I have this disease that makes me place online orders

yeah i’m ok! i’m totally ok i just (takes a deep breath) (starts screaming)

it IS a phase, mom

show me a permanent state of the self, mom

Impermanence does not mean insignificance, mom

The key to a happier life is being in a constant state of change and acceptance, mom

i made an aesthetic generator now you can discover urself

once i figure out how to pull off ‘feminine dad’ it’s over for you bitches

i jus got back from foolin around w this girl n she had her bed out in the middle of the got-damned nowhere, like not against a wall, not against any wall at all, just in the middle of th fucking room surrounded by this gauzy material shit on a hoop above the bed w some fairy lights all stuck on it for ~aesthetic~ and the whole fuckdamn time i kept thinkin HOW does this woman sleep like this?! monsters come getcha from any and all directions!! snatch u off the bed from the fuckin top, the sides, the bottom NO DIRECTION IS SAFE !! “you wanna stay the night babe?” NO!!! I DO NOT!!! i wanna live thru the night & not wake up to demons caressing my head from your unprotected bed space!! i feel cursed having just fucked on it..! got some dark interloper followin me home hopin i got the same shitty setup!! no sir!! 2 walls for this biché. 4 if i could get em. sleep in a fuckin box w a lil hole cut in it. i need protection!!! 0/10 setup. any type of translucent canopy over a bed is ASKING for a ghost to stand on the other side and watch u sleep. wake up to a hazy outline “o honey is that u?” NO ITS A DEMON. i cannot believe i suffered this tonight. the things i do for a beautiful girl honeSTLY

Hey OP, it looks like it’s been a few months since you posted, are you able to provide an update? are you safe? did you heal? I’m honestly still very upset by the whole concept/situation that you introduced me to, and I hope that you have made a full recovery. BECAUSE I HAVEN’T

jj the world is still worried about your haunted bajeener you gotta update folks

every time i spread my legs vincent price narrates the monologue from the haunted mansion ride but other than that i’ve been good