Capitalpunk

Terminal

Isn’t there a emergency door release cable in the back that you have to pull up on, but it actually sits underneath the floor mat, so you have to like peel that shit back and find the cable

I wanna be one of the KFC workers in the Pentagon. What is that like. Imagine having that level of security clearance so you can make people chicken on their lunch breaks. When Marx talked about praxis this is what he meant. Does the Pentagon KFC hit different? Imagine being 16 and getting to tell your friends that you work in the Pentagon after school. I want to boil myself in the Pentagon KFC deep fryers

Metal Gear Solid wishes it was the level of military criticism that the existence of the Pentagon KFC is

KFC tastes noticeably different in different countries because it has to accommodate things like halal in muslim countries, which begs the question of what exactly is in their north american fried chicken recipe that doesn’t make it halal. What do they put in the Pentagon KFC chicken. Do they put the stuff that made Malcolm the middle in it

I should be allowed into the Pentagon to slurp up the delicious sultry spices their KFC keeps in the meat locker

essence of ronald reagan

going delirious on the thought of ronald reagan pentagon kfc. i want to live deliciously.

i was today years old when i learned guantanamo bay has a mcdonalds and giftshop

The toddlers currently binge watching finger family among us pregnancy coffin dance elsa spiderman play with slime compilation videos are going to one day invent the most intriguing and uniquely repulsive EDM subgenre in mankind's existence on their Amazon smart home creator software in 2033

The genre will be typified by 3-10sec long sonifications of NFTs punctuated by the sound of random objects hitting the pavement after falling from a great height. The genre will be cancelled 4 weeks after being created when artist Karkat Musk, known by zir stage name sludge_emoji samples the sound of a box of Ninja Funko pops falling off a warehouse shelf and killing a fulfillment center indentured servent

2024. your alex (alexa has been made gender neutral) wakes you up with an alarm at 5:30.... you thought you didn't need to wake up until 7, but your work's schedule app shows that the scheduling ai changed the schedule overnight, following the termination of your coworker brandyn, and your alarm was automatically adjusted. you feel like shit. "alex," you say, "i need to call in. i feel horrible..." you hold still as alex's camera scans you and they analyze your appearance for signs of illness. "you appear to be feeling fine," they say, "are you sure you want me to go ahead with that request?" you grimace.... you're exhausted. you steel yourself for whatever consequences are to come.... "yes," you say. "alright," says alex, "i'm submitting your request now." your phone buzzes on your wrist - the request has been received. a second notification. you've been terminated for falsifying a sick day request. a third - this one is from the property management company that owns your apartment - after receiving notice of your termination, the leasing ai has elected to evict you. within 24 hours, your smart home security will no longer recognize you as a resident. alex starts to count down

BTW you are not working for some kind of orwellian megacorp you are working at a little coffeeshop owned by a pleasant blonde woman who uses the scheduling app because its convenient and your apartment complex is a small one with only 10 units and the office staff is friendly but they dont really make the decisions and things are so normal you can convince yourself that things are normal and pleasant and everything is so convenient

I try to come at occult with the most scholarly and anti-woo attitude possible but advertisements might as well be curses

#the coca cola logo is a glyph of Make You Angry

numerology