Actual tips I have as an autistic person for my neurodivergent friends that struggle with similar shortcomings:
1. If you have a lot of trouble with brushing your hair dry, but you have an okay relationship with showering, brush it with conditioner in! You’ll get softer hair, it won’t hurt as much, AND any hairs that fall out will be washed away so they won’t be on your clothes!
2. If you are having trouble eating, do LITERALLY anything to make your brain happy at the prospect. Watch a video while you eat, pretend you’re eating with your favorite character, get on all fours with jungle sounds in the background and eat like a dinosaur. Seriously. ANYTHING.
3. Drink water and iced drinks in enclosed, nonclear containers so your brain doesn’t reject them like a mama bird. Water smells like wet dog to me, so making sure I CAN’T smell it is a must. Get a container with a straw, preferably.
4. If you drink a lot of sugary drinks (like me), use a straw. This will help you decrease the risk of getting cavities, especially in your two front teeth. Also, NEVER wash the toothpaste out of your mouth (spitting out the excess is fine), as leaving it on your teeth with make them cleaner and give you more room for error. Sensodyne is great, as it helps sensitive teeth and has a mild taste.
5. Go outside. Please. I know it sucks, but if you walk around for even fifteen minutes your brain will surrender so much fucking dopamine. Also, keep your curtains open if you can, so that you’re not in a casino-esque state of timelessness.
6. If you feel bad, ask yourself the following questions:
- Am I at a comfortable temperature?
- Have I eaten in the past five hours?
- Have I seen another human person recently?
If you answered “no” to any of those questions, fix it and come back. You’ll probably feel better, at least marginally.
7. Don’t try to fix everything at once. When it comes to current events, pick something that you care about, and focus on them. Or maybe two. But if you try to give your money and time to every cause, you will burn yourself out.
8. If you are walking on the street, don’t try to make eye contact with everyone. I had to unlearn this after working in a grocery store and being expected to be approachable all the time. Look ahead at something, or look near the sidewalk/floor. That’s mental energy you could be spending elsewhere.
9. If you don’t know what to say, use a compliment. People fucking love those. Especially about clothes, hair, and/or accessories. Not about their body, though, that’ll make them feel weird if you don’t know them well.
10. Guilt and shame are not motivators. You will not be a better person because you sat inside all day and beat yourself up about every bias you have and mistake you made. You are allowed to be flawed, and you are allowed to improve. And the best way to do that is to meet people and try new things. And if you run into another bias or mental block, take note of it, file it away, and use it to better yourself.
