Stuff and Things

when the blackberry bushes have thorns to discourage mammals from monopolizing the consumption of their fruits and encourage birds to spread their seeds but they don’t know that the mammal in question is ME #notdiscouraged

It’s so funny how like. Spock is queer bc of the subtext, the Otherness inextricable from his character, meanwhile William Shatner was handed the straightest man of all time on paper and fumbled the bag bc he couldn’t stop giving Leonard Nimoy fuck-me eyes and now he lives in a bi Kirk hell of his own devising, forever enduring the conshatquences of his shactions

straight white people making a romance movie: haha what if it was illegal to have sex? wait what's lawrence v texas. wait what's mclaughlin v florida. wait what's loving v virginia

We need to isolate and start selectively breeding the plastic eating bacteria so we can optimise their efficiency, and then somehow splice their DNA into the gut bacteria of an obligate carnivore, so we can put it in our cats gut biomes so they'll finally be free of having to choose between whether they want to eat plastic or whether they want to live.

When I was a kid watching tv was idiot coded and nerds read books, but now scrolling shortform videos is considered braindead behavior and watching tv means you're some kinda intellectual. You might think this shifting assessment of media's consumers might make readers into absolute super geniuses, but no. Only perverts read now.

"time heals all wounds" WRONG. time is chasing me with a knife

it is a rookie mistake to assume that the person making deeply anachronistic, inaccurate, and fairytale-esque knightposts knows nothing about real knights. i know all about real knights. i just think overseeing the farmland on your estate, explicitly being in it for (more) land and money, fighting less than half the year, and dying of cholera is sort of boring while swearing undying oaths is really sexy

Vote for me and I will make werewolves real

Top scientists wil work hard round the clock to make it a reality

Bottom scientists as well

You’d think that once you finally get long term access to a cat and your yearning to have cat access is fulfilled that you’d become slightly less obsessed with seeing people’s cats but no if anything it gets worse

costco should sell weed i want to smoke kirkland signature strain

Alarm Off perfec t time for put lying in bed to t/hink! Inside very Quiet and Peace thoughts very productive put in Alarm Off. Put Thinking in Alarm Off time. no problems ever lying in bedd with alarm off because good Contemplation and Eyes Closed for difficult deep thoughts about day. alarmOff yes safe place to close eyes lie in bed can trust not to fall back asleep. friend bed