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kindergarten teacher betrayal call that double cross applesauce

you've met me at a very "yeah i'm trying to work on that" time in my life

if you vote me for president i vow to make everything the ocean again. no more land only ocean. this will solve all of our problems and replace them with new, far more interesting problems

it sucks cuz my fave ben & jerry ice cream has a pic of jimmy fallon on it. the tonight’s dough. it’s so good though. but i hate having him in my house. i hate seeing his little cuck face in the store. i legit turn the container around when i store it in the freezer to minimize face to face time. whenever i’m gonna buy some i tell my sister “i’m going to get the little cuck cream at the store” and she knows what i mean

i abs0lut3ly h4t3 th3 w4y y0u phr4as3d “little cuck cream”

i are what i eat

you have made this post infinitely worse. blocked.

fuck dude you stunned them into regular speak instead of homestuck roleplay

truly some people have no genre savviness whatsoever. A girl came back from the dead the other day and fresh out of the grave she laughed and laughed and lay down on the grass nearby to watch the sky, dirt still under her nails. I asked her if she’s sad about anything and she asked me why she should be. I asked her if she’s perhaps worried she’s a shadow of who she used to be and she said that if she is a shadow she is a joyous one, and anyway whoever she was she is her, now, and that’s enough. I inquired about revenge, about unfinished business, about what had filled her with the incessant need to claw her way out from beneath but she just said she’s here to live. I told her about ghosts, about zombies, tried to explain to her how her options lie between horror and tragedy but she just said if those are the stories meant for her then she’ll make another one. I said “isn’t it terribly lonely how in your triumph over death nobody was here to greet you?” and she just looked at me funny and said “what do you mean? The whole world was here, waiting”. Some people, I tell you.

your friend small af and weirdddd

the fact that AA/NA, an abstinence-only, deeply religious, non evidence supported model based off writings from the 1930s, is seen as the first, only, and mandatory form of treatment for problematic/dangerous drug use is insane and ridiculous and i hate it and i hate how normalized and institutionalized AA is. people have to choose between AA or jail, AA or not having custody of their kids, AA or not getting welfare it's embarassing that the war on drugs and drug use has gone on this long with so much evidence against it

what is it they put in the hardware store to make it smell so good

Another reason why trains would be good is that most people are not good at driving

happy june everybody i hope you get fucked and/or sucked this month

what if we don't wanna be?

if theres one thing that really pissed me off from my 3 years of architecture i took in high school it's learning about how we used to have all these little techniques to maximize or minimize heat or warmth and now we just merrily abandoned all those to have the same copypaste style buildings everywhere that are often INCREDIBLY unoptimized to the local weather and climate so we can just throw more money at our heating and cooling bills

where i live it is hot as balls approximately 80% of the year. i do not want a massive butt-ugly grey mcmansion with a huge echoey open-concept kitchen-livingroom-foyer-diningroom-staircase that has huge windows so i can have an hvac unit the size of a barge heaving and straining to keep it at a constant 72 the grees. i want a north indian traditional style home with small windows to force the airflow to cool, decorative grates to limit the amount of sunlight, and a COURTYARD with a POND *smashes unspecified large object*

I hate learning about instances of "oh yeah we know how to do that, we just don't".