𝖘𝖕𝖊𝖑𝖑𝖇𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖉

he nodded, “yeah, yeah, i think we plan on tellin’- for, like, shower stuff and all that.” plus, murphy wasn’t sure he could keep it a secret for long, he was too excited about it. his eyebrows shot up at aster’s next question, an anxiousness stirring in his stomach, “i… well, ok, i’ll be honest, i thought about it, but i don’t want her to think i’m doin’ it just because of the baby, ya know? i think i’m gonna wait until they’re born and stuff. and, like, give us time to talk about it and if that’s what she wants in our future and all that…” he, of course, would love to marry sophia, but he figured they could talk about that down the line- considering they had been doing everything out of order anyway. he laughed then, “no opal, got it- i always thought a diamond anyway. maybe one of those cool pink ones or somethin’?” 

“ a baby shower! how CUTE. you know if you need any help, i’m more than happy to. tommy, too. ” even if that really meant aster tugging on his sleeve and tommy carrying all the boxes to heavy for her. “ i get that. ” someone thinking you’re marrying them just because they’re having your child did not sound like the foundation for a happy marriage. even though she was sure no one could believe that of murphy. “ mhmm. opal is practically a curse and i like you guys too much to let you set yourself up for divorce. pink diamonds sound really nice though. very romantic with the use of pink. rose quartz is always a strong contender because it’s practically the stone of love. ”

       closed starter ♡ @asterrology​

“ do you believe that we have souls, aster ? i watched this documentry last night and it was about the twenty-one grams experiment which was an experiment that some scientist guy ran because he believed that we all would lose twenty-one grams upon death because that’s our soul leaving our body or something. but then, like, i’m pretty sure people shit themselves when they die, so i would think that’s more than likely a better explanation as to why we lose weight as soon as we die, right ? ” this is the most brain power soph’s used this year. heck, she might even overclock her brain soon. “ if souls are real does that mean heaven and hell are too ? because if that’s the case, i’m definitely going down to chill with the devil and i don’t know if i like the thought of that. ”

“ of course i do. ” when it came to topics like this, aster always had an air of confidence to her words. “ our souls are what make us who we are. plus, soulmates! how could we have soulmates without a soul? ” maybe she should have asked more about what prompted this question rather than potentially feeding some existential crisis or breakdown, but sophia provided context without that encouragement from aster. “ i can’t tell you how much a soul weighs, ” aster admitted. “ but you know, i’m not a big fan of believing this end is THE end. i think we’ve done this before and we’ll do it again. if we’re really lucky, it’ll be together again. our souls will find each other in the next life. with murph and tommy, of course. our soulmates. ” aster had no control over what happened to them, but the way she took soph’s hand and spoke was as if she thought otherwise. “ but if it is the end, soph, i don’t think you’d end up there. you’re a wonderful person. ” the soul that knew hers better than anyone else was murphy, who spoke about her in only the most wonderful ways. “ i don’t think you have to worry about that. ”

he gave her a genuine smile, “i’m glad… i know it was… a lot…” for everyone, apparently. he was still picking up the pieces and trying to figure out how to cope without his best friend and it had hardly even been two days, “i’m happy you and tommy are good too.” murphy blushed slightly then, “thanks, uh, we’re really excited. she’s doin’ alright. she’s just been super tired, our nugget sucks the energy right outta her sometimes. and we’re pretty solid.” by some miracle, he hadn’t managed to fuck that up yet, “we, uh, might be able to find out gender this week, actually.” he told her excitedly, happy to talk about something not so heavy- aster was always good for that. 

“ yeah, we’re good. ” and even if they were the only good thing, it was enough for aster. “ you guys are gonna tell us, right? ” though it all felt like a mess now, aster thought of their baby news as the sun peeking from behind the cloud. “ are you going to propose? i would SO come ring shopping with you. even if you go with, like, eds or something – ” even though that seemed like the last thing she expected from him. “ you have to promise me that you won’t get a ring with opal in it. like, that’s the number one rule. i don’t care how madly in love with tommy i am ; if he proposed with an opal in any way shape or form, i’m saying no. ”

new year’s had started out great for raphael and aster, which almost made their current friendship falter feel worse. plans fizzled out, but she wasn’t content to just leave it at that. the image on a loop in her mind was the way he shrugged her hand off his shoulder. the distance put between them, and no matter how hard she tried, she could never make robin the sole villain. not even just eddie and robin. just like them, aster knew. she knew and didn’t give raph the peace. there was an open line of communication between him and tommy, which made the bridge seem a little less burnt down. it was all she had to draw on for courage to knock on the door to 1a. “ raph, it’s aster! ” in the moment that passes without acknowledgment, there’s a moment of doubt that flashes through her about if she would even get one.

as soon as the door swung open, the words were tumbling from aster’s lips. “ raph, i’m so sorry. ” a bag dropped by the door in favour of aster’s arms wrapping around him. “ i can’t even imagine what right now must feel like for you. ” betrayal from a lover had always been high on aster’s list of ‘ worst things that could happen ’ and now one of her friends had that from both past and present. well, technically both past now. “ i swear i thought you knew. ” and it was naive of her, but aster still wanted to think he was going to do the right thing. ‘ he might have been lying all this time, but NOW he’s going to turn around. ’ a small, selfish part of aster considered the fact she was not only torn up over the guilt of how raphael found out but also the fact she had to add another nail to the coffin of the robin she thought she knew as he proved her wrong over and over again. “ i’m sorry. ”

watch the sunrise. he’d almost forgotten about that offer. they’d talked about it weeks before proper new year’s; with aster’s comfort found beneath the stars paired with his own insomniac tendencies, it only made sense to spend the night the same way they had so many others. 

granted — we all know he still would’ve said yes under the most insensible of situations, too. such as in below-freezing temperatures. tommy is now, as he has found himself frequently to be in the redhead’s presence, fussy, tucking the old fleece blanket they’d brought up tighter around her form. “hm?” comes his reply, distant and paying very little attention, a further tendency of his, until he’s content that his girlfriend won’t be turning into an ice block under his arm anytime soon. “n’aw, babe, i didn’t do anything, really. you handled it all like a fuckin’ champ, i was just your pretty arm candy. though, if you wanna think that…” sad aster was the worst. it was even worse, he thinks, than when he was the one at fault for sad-aster, was not being able to do anything about sad-aster other than crack his soft jokes and press kisses to her temples. “maybe you should date me about it. like, forever, if you’ve got the free time.” 

“ no, tommy, that’s not true. i don’t think i could have done all of that without you. ” without the guarantee of someone being there to catch her when it all fell apart. “ just being there means so much. you probably could’ve had a more enjoyable time doing something else, or at least a more consistent time. ” but it didn’t go without noticing tommy gave her the unconditional love and support that was usually left unrequited. “ i’m just glad you chose to spend it with me. ” she didn’t believe tommy actually wanted to lie to her, but the praise of handling it like a champ still felt like the last way aster would have described the situation. “ do you really think that? i mean, i feel like i crossed a line or i was too harsh on him. ” maybe that was just because actually standing up to robin was uncharted territory. “ i should check on him, right ? ” just like after the fistfight, there’s the lingering thought in the back of her mind that robin might not have anyone else there for him. “ he’s been a really important part of my life for a while now. plus, he seemed really sweet at ginger’s. like he actually sorry when he was trying to explain things or apologize. ” or as tommy called it, his manipulator encore. “ how much of our friendship was just robin manipulating? because it all sounded like that and i thought he genuinely liked me. ” did she even want to hear the answer to that? at least before she’d be able to pretend there was some part of their connection that was genuine beyond robin using her cluelessness to feel better about himself. aster shifts in tommy’s arms just enough to look up at him. “ forever, huh? ” aster’s hand slips from where she had it draped over his chest to rest on the side of his face. “ you know, i’d really like that. ” there was so much uncertainty now, but she’s sure of that. of tommy.

@asterrology​ 

he stepped out onto the fire escape, a small smile curling his lips as he realized that aster was already out there. they hadn’t talked since everything went down and even though he could probably use some alone time, he never minded spending it with the redhead instead, “hey ast…” he sat down, legs swinging as he tugged a hat on, “what’s up? sorry i haven’t texted or anything…” 

the fire escape had become a point of refuge for aster. the fresh air and sound of birds chirping was calming to her. especially when the background noise of tommy strumming his guitar ( aka her first choice ) had stopped for a shift down at the bar. murph’s presence on the fire escape wasn’t completely unexpected, but aster was appreciative nonetheless. “ murph, hey. ” the smile she had to force always seemed a little easier to muster in his company. “ you don’t have to apologize, it’s totally fine. ” she couldn’t be mad when she hadn’t texted him either. “ i’ve just been with tommy, which has been really good. ” even more so when compared to the dumpster fire of a party they had thrown. “ but i’ve been thinking of you and soph. we’re both genuinely happy for you guys. how’s she going? ”

the new year’s party went CONSIDERABLY worse than anyone had been expecting. what aster thought was just going to be an awkward night of trying to dodge robin without setting off any alarm bells was quickly changed to the lowest point in their group since they were literally punching each other. even though no one left bloody this time, aster would consider it worse. the trust and hearts broken that night stung more than the close call of robin’s broken nose. though the eager plans they made with raphael earlier in the night seemed to fizzle out, aster was far too worked up to just go to bed after fighting with robin. not for lack of trying. it’s a while of laying in bed next to tommy before she’s propping herself up on one elbow to look at him in the dark. ‘ can we still go watch the sunrise? ’ at least it would serve as a distraction. as well as justifying staying up beyond the fact she couldn’t get to sleep while it felt like everything was falling apart. everything except for her lover accepting her offer with a kiss. gathering blankets and aster slipping one of his hoodies over the shirt she had already claimed that night, they headed up to the roof aster wasn’t exactly sure if they were allowed to turn into a makeshift bed but had already decided she didn’t care about that tonight. tossing cushions and covers around with tommy had her smiling more than she had since shit hit the fan at midnight. it wasn’t the most well presented set up in the world, but it was warm and cozy. besides, aster cuddled up to tommy than anything else. “ thank you. ” aster’s soft, vague words break the silence. “ for coming with me. for everything tonight, ” she clarified. not just the pulling her closer and reassuring her when she needed it, but also twirling her on the dance floor. being her midnight kiss. pretty much every silver lining of aster’s night came in the form of thomas moore. “ you are the best thing in my life. ”

he lets aster ramble on, the knot in his throat growing tighter and tighter with every one of her naive speculations. robin hasn’t ever been the type to get nervous about things he says, no matter how stupid or presumptious or downright self-rightuous those words may be, but the longer he holds out on spitting this out the more he’s worried that he’ll never be able to get it through his teeth. he’s been lying for so long that he can’t even remember what it is to tell the truth, and maybe it’s the uncertainty of this new territory that gets him more nervous than anything else. 

he can’t entertain aster’s fantasies (at least, not these ones) for much longer, so when she finally pauses to ask him something or another about new year’s, he takes a deep breath and lets it all out. “ast, babe, no. it’s not any of that,” he says. his voice is soft but rushed, though it’s not like aster not understanding him in this instance will be any help, even if it’s what would make this easier. “what i wanted to say is that i’ve, um.” and he isn’t the stuttering kind, isn’t the hesitation kind, barely has ‘uh’ or ‘um’ in his vocabulary, but fuck, this is hard. “i’ve been lying to you. to everyone. i’ve been lying to all of you about my past, where i’ve come from, who i am. and i’m really fucking sorry, but that’s the truth.”

sure, aster and robin had never been the definition of easy. ( who knows if anything that was one-half robin ever could be. ) they had their moments of weakness like every friendship did, but aster always thought she could consider them happy. it wasn’t often you saw robin without his composure, and it was worrying. “ you can tell me anything. ” her words gentle and reassuring to match the hand she extended out to rub his arm. honesty was a big thing for aster. she was naive and trusting enough to usually forgive whatever happened, but it was the keeping secrets and lying that really got to her.

something robin should have known, considering he was the one that had to deal with her heartbroken after someone other than tommy told her about his history with riley. an old fling was nothing compared to the idea that everything she thought she knew about one of her closest friends could be nothing but a lie. robin’s never been much of a prankster. if you asked aster, this was a cruel and not at all funny way to start. yet it was still a better alternative than considering he was serious right now. “ no. ” was all she could manage to say at first and that’s when her hand slipped away to drop back by her side. “ no, robin, i know you. we’re friends. you’re like my best friend. ” with roman distancing himself and tommy promoted to the status of boyfriend ; she was pretty confident in giving that title to robin. or at least she thought she was. “ you wouldn’t do that to me. ” other people in the group, she could see that. just not to her. not lies between THEM.

the first night soph told aster that eddie didn’t wasn’t an immediate cause for concern. murph was his best friend after all. she couldn’t fault him for wanting to spend time with his friend over christmas. it was the multiple days AFTER that started to concern aster. it didn’t take a genius to put two and two together when eddie practically moved into murph’s place with soph. no matter how curious she was, aster knew bombarding him with a million questions would not go well. that didn’t mean she didn’t want to talk to eddie, though. in a relationship or not ; he was still her friend. now more so than ever, she figured he could use some support and guidance. a quiet morning coffee out on the fire escape alone, no doubt to get some peace from murphy and sophia. peace quickly disturbed by a door opening and aster’s greeting. “ hey, i was hoping i’d find you out here. ” though a quick glance through the window before she came out left little up to chance. “ i didn’t want to just text you about your horoscope when you’re right next door. like, all the time now. ” even though aster didn’t expect much of an explanation from eddie, she still paused for a moment to give him a chance. “ i wouldn’t text murph or tommy about it when i could see them to talk about it. now you and soph are included in that ! it may not feel like it right now, but gemini is lining up to be in a really good place soon. a new beginning coming up with the new year. a nice renewal or like a rebirth, whatever you want to call it. now’s the time to find your inner peace and shift your mindset to accept this upcoming change. ”

the debut feature film starring @asterrology​​​​ !!

on the surface, he’s the poster boy for cool as a cucumber. he lounges on aster’s couch just as he does on many weekday nights, holding a joint between his fingers as he inhales and exhales with a practiced ease. usually, his mind is at a perfect peace when he smokes, but it runs amok today, replaying thanksgiving and the weeks that have followed it. he’s waited and waited to see what edward was going to do with his newfound information, his nerves only intensifying with each week that nothing was done. he thought that ed was playing chess with him, but perhaps it’s more like jiu-jitsu, and edward’s feeling out the right moment to attack all at once. 

so he sits on the couch, and his fingers twitch a bit as they hold the joint, mind spinning all the while. aster sits in the room with him, commenting occasionally about the tarot cards she’s sorting through. before she can make another quip about how the cards says either doomed or destined for great things or maybe something in between, he speaks up. “yo, not to bring the mood down, but i’ve been meaning to talk to you about something. maybe the stars have already given you some hints.” he doesn’t sit up, but he does look over, facing aster instead of the ceiling in his lied-down state. “you tight with pausing the tarot for a hot sec?”

aster and robin had developed plenty of routines or traditions over the course of their friendship, but there was no doubt aster’s favorites were the lazy hangouts at her apartment. she looked up to robin as a mentor, but she liked it so much more when he was her friend. perhaps she should be a little concerned when he says they have to talk. even more so when he prefaces it with ‘ not to bring the mood down ’ because typically there was nothing good that followed either of those things. especially not when they’re together. was this robin get sick of her too ? would it be better or worse to actually hear it rather than to just pull away like roman did ? then again, when had aster and robin ever been typical ? she did her best to push those negative thoughts to the side as the deck was placed down. fingers lingering over one last card, hoping for some insight of what was to come. ultimately, the fear of what she’d see won out.

“ i know exactly what you’re talking about. ” though it didn’t seem to phase aster. every warning sign from the stars was painted over with a rosy tinge to match the ‘ everything is perfect ’ narrative aster had spun for herself. “ the eclipse season, right ? i know my rising sign is destined to be affected and so is tommy’s, BUT the eclipse can bring new beginnings as well as endings. maybe we’re just starting a new chapter ? like, moving in together ! we technically did that before the eclipse, but i think it could count, right ? i know you’re my friend and you’re just looking out for me. ” she didn’t stop to consider the fact robin wouldn’t have the eclipse season memorized the way she did. or the fact he probably didn’t know her rising sign, much less tommy’s. she didn’t want to think about what more serious conversation he wanted to have out of fear she guessed right the first time. “ but i think everything is going to be good. there’s going to be nothing but positive energy going into the new year. it just all feels so RIGHT, don’t you think ? soph and murph are back together, roman is back in general. ” even if the surface was starting to crack, aster would turn a blind eye. “ you’re gonna have a christmas dinner with me and tommy at some point, right ? ” and as many other’s as she could convince to come. “ and new year’s eve! i’m sure we’ll have some kind of party. you’ll save me a dance, won’t you ? ”

       closed starter ♡ @asterrology​

“ so, like, ed crashed here last night and i don’t mean to be a bitch or whatever, but i’m already annoyed. ” and by here she means murphy’s place. ever since the whole ‘ oh shit, we’re having a baby ’ situation occured, soph’s unofficially moved in on her own accord. sighing heavily, she gives the pink-coloured bauble in her grasp a small spin before reaching over to hang it off a branch of the christmas tree. “ don’t get me wrong, i love him and i think deep, deep, deep down he’s a caring person, but sometimes his face just triggers me. it’s like i’m staring straight into the soul of handsome squidward or something. ”

although aster knew it wasn’t accusation, she still felt the need to defend sophia’s choice of words. “ you know i’d never think of you like that. ” if you asked her, compassion and understanding were some of aster’s strong suits. “ well, we can just focus on the first half, right ? of course we love eddie. he genuinely has a good soul. ” even if it took a little bit more effort than usual to truly see it. “ but there has to be something fun about his presence. you wouldn’t keep him in your life if he didn’t add to it. maybe you just have to take a step back and think about WHY he’s your friend. all the things you like about him. ” a soft shrug of her shoulders as she tried to untangle the christmas lights. “ maybe write a letter ? that way you can read it back whenever you feel like that. ”

After months of being overseas for an International case, Eli couldn’t feel even more content for being back. In time for the festive season, even. She’s been keeping track of the plans of her best friends, but haven’t responded to them because she’d want to surprise them.

Going back to Waitsfield brought a lot of memories – both good and bad. Since she left, she hasn’t kept in contact with her adoptive parents. That’s a thought for some other day.

“Excuse me, you seem familiar,” Eli said jokingly then grinned at the sight of one of her best friends.

according to aster, there was something wondrous about being invited to waitsfield for thanksgiving. even if these were the people she was around every single day and the birth charts she had memorized, this was a different kind of glimpse into who they were as people. that AND the fact getting further away from new york meant a better view of the stars. no matter how slight, aster would appreciate it. everything in waitsfield was exciting and new.

which is partly why the sudden voice caught aster off guard. familiar? if she hadn’t left tommy with roman, she would have just assumed the comment was directed at him. she was going to tell them that there must have been some confusion somewhere, but when aster turned to speak she wasn’t met with a stranger at all. “ ellie! ” as soon as the greeting ( or more accurately, squeal ) left aster’s lips, she was throwing her arms around the other. “ i’ve missed you so much! we all have. you got my horoscope updates, right? i made sure to send you everything i thought would help you with your things over there. ”

aster sat on the countertop, watching riley moving back and forth around the kitchen of nico’s childhood home. “ i know this recipe says two teaspoons of cinnamon, but that doesn’t feel right. it’s, like, the best part of all these fall flavours. ” it went without saying cooking was more riley’s specialty than aster’s. “ we can add more to our pumpkin pie, right? give it some personality. make it more US, you know? ”