semi-professional hater

Boytoy but like he's a boy whom i toy with by cutting him open and studying him like a biology dissection project

stay vigilant. there are still people out there who will try to convince you that eating fruit is somehow bad for your body

the "biblically accurate angel" trend is such a perfect encapsulation of a pet peeve i have which is everybody wants to criticize the bible but nobody wants to read the bible. like when people were drawing crazy amalgamations of eyes and wheels talking to mary and saying "be not afraid" and everybody was like omfggg OF COURSE she was scared. like no actually the angel looked like a guy can you read 3 lines of text... they were saying be not afraid because it's scary when a random man suddenly shows up in your house and starts talking to you

subtextjob from a girl with huge implications

just helped an old old man log into his outlook account and we succeeded and he said “young lady, go in peace. we have accomplished this mission.” what an electrifying way of speaking…

I love rebloging. It’s the adult equivalent of showing everyone the cool rock I just found.

bread so tasty. bread so nice. toast it once. toast it twice.

toast three times. it turns to coal. burning toast is not my goal.

I like when you click a link and it turns purple its like youre bruising it