how strange it is to be anything at all

If you're hypermobile, be especially gentle.

Just saw my doctor type "FUCKED FOR LIFE" on my chart then he turned the screen away and stopped making eye contact with me

Wednesday the 15th. What an excellent day. Middle of the week, middle of the month. Truly, we are in the middle of things.

Goddamit i hate this fucking post. I hate it because obviously if “twelve” followed the same pattern as the other teen numbers it wouldn’t be “twoteen” it would be “seconteen”. Think about it. It’s not “threeteen” it’s “thirteen” as in “third”. It’s not “fiveteen” it’s “fifteen” as in fifth. So with that in mind, you count “first, second, third, fourth, fifth,” and so on, so eleven would be “firsteen” and twelve would be “secondteen” or “seconteen”. “Firsteen, seconteen, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen….” It just drives me absolutely mad everytime i see this post that this obvious pattern was overlooked and i cant hold in my rage anymore.

interesting hypothesis! i have a question,

there’s a friday ass vibe about this wednesday boys keep your wits about you

An analysis of posting trends on Tumblr suggests that the ideal form of the visual novel is a semi-linear murder mystery whose gameplay consists of solving middle-school "who lives in the blue house?" style verbal logic puzzles, except every time you guess wrong a mean bisexual MILF makes fun of you.

hush little baby dont you cry. mamas gonna buy you a big horse fly. and if that big horse fly dont fly. mamas gonna buy you another horse fly

[club mix] another horse fly. another horse fly

Parents are giving their children names no one has ever spoken out loud before

Baby Name Consultant is the type of job title you'd see people claim to have on HGTV while nitpicking 3 different multi-million dollar houses.

I Was So Good And Polite They Are Putting Me In The Touch Tank At Aquarium Tomorrow.

Dat's right boss. Now just tell us what ya need and we'll get it done boss.

who needs ta sleep with da fishes boss

sorry bawss, I was too busy searchin up da anime girls boss. real pretty.

Forget dem anime goils. Dere only temporary. But da boss is forever. Right boss?

Da boss got turned into a butterfly!!

Wadda bea-utiful transformation, boss. goes to show youse gotta preciate the lil things in life

ay boss congrats on da metamoiphosis