In a dream you saw a way to survive

i love Not to jump the gun here but with rozanov’s permission…? i think shane in that scene was feeling fiercely protective over another person for the first time in his life. so bowled over by the intensity of his own emotions that he stumbled back to his hotel room in a daze and immediately jerked off in the shower about it. “what if rozanov got arrested and i had to use my immense hockey wealth to bail him out of jail and it was winter in boston. so he had hypothermia. and he had to live with me while we sorted out the legal situation and i yelled at journalists for him and helped him with his paperwork and hired the best lawyer in the world and nursed him back to health and he was like “hollander……..you saved my life 🥺” and he fucked me soooo hard every night for stress relief (obviously he couldn’t fuck other people. due to the lawsuit) and we fell asleep in each other’s arms afterwards. because there’s only one bed in my apartment and he’s too tall for the couch” stuff like that. normal fantasies

my favorite thing about ilya is that he lives in a 100% glass house both figuratively and literally and his hobby is chucking stones at people as hard as he can. ilya voice, ask me if i give a fuck!! fuck you and fuck me too!!

I’ve been thinking a LOT lately about what a weird and stressful experience it is to care a lot about a story when you don’t trust the storyteller.

does shane have pierced ears or is that just hudson. and if he does when do u think he got them pierced

shane going with a juniors buddy c. 2007 to get them pierced and getting peer pressured into getting an ear done too but he panics abt remembering which ear is the gay ear so he gets both

The thing about supernatural. Hello. I hope everyone is having a good day. The thing about supernatural is that I do think there is a part of jensen acjles that thinks if he makes the environment just a littleeeeeeeee more hostile. It’ll kill off destiel. The problem with this. Of course. Is that it is nigh impossible. To kill somebody with radiation. When you were feeding them the elephant’s foot when they were 14. This is my natural habitat now. Intolerable to life? Not to me. not in the world I’m living in.

once shane moves in with ilya and they’re able to codependencymax i think shane’s parents (probably yuna) broach the topic of how theyre together all the time but shane cuts her off before she can even say anything with “I know!! isn’t it great we get to do everything together it’s the best!!! we thought we’d have to wait until we retired but we get to play together and live together and i’m very happy and Ilya is too!!!” and she’s like okay honeymoon period got it and then like 5 years later thinks about trying again but decides it’s not worth it because those two want to live in eachothers skin but that’s not possible to this will do.

top 10 days of ilya’s life were definitely getting to see shane’s childhood bedroom and touching everything, he probably asked a hundred questions without breathing once - “nice room…” “what’s this” “what’s that” “yearbooks!?!” “so cute and boring” “YOU BLEACHED YOUR HAIR?” “awww you look so cute here” “most likely to play for the NHL wow” “who are these girls signing with hearts?! are you cheating on me?” “what’s that” “so many trophys mr superstar” “wearing a jersey for halloween is so boring” “can i have this picture” “you still have all your jerseys?” “who are those children” “PROM PICTURES” “aw all your ottawa friends” “what’re those?” “why are you wearing goalie gear” “you look so cute” “you read books that aren’t about hockey?” “where is the poster of me?” “you had to play with number 42?” “what is timbits hockey” “of course you were 10 year old captain” “what’s that” “hockey bedsheets im not surprised” “is that a puck shaped pillow” “wow hollander you are obsessed with hockey”

[looking at people younger than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at people older than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at myself] its over

ilya courting shane like is everything you dreamed of?/ montreal is nice yes? boston is nice too?/we will be seeing each other a lot/ you look pretty like yes he was hunting that boy for sport but he was also just a young man with a crush.. he just thought shane was soooo cute and wanted to connect with him and be near him and get in his head and haunt him and eat him alive wait who said that

btw one day tiny hollander-rozanov gets asked what their papa’s real name is and they say “baby”

Ilya is a yearner but Shane is NOT a yearner. Shane is a doer and a problem solver. At first he solves the problem of his feelings for Ilya by compartmentalizing and not feeling them. When this strategy stops working he hard pivots to going after his man. This man is not sitting around pining and suffering he is getting things done!