you literally have to unironically listen to some shit like party rock anthem so you don’t kill yourself

[the most low energy you have ever seen me] we’re about to go crazy mode

Give me less "being kind requires zero effort" and more "being kind is worth the effort it takes."

im completely addicted to Open Link in New Tab

if Open Link in New Tab is wrong then baby i dont want to be right

hey *holds your hand tenderly* *smiles softly* please stop centering men.... i know you can be better than this

*visibly desperate* hey... isn't it cool how this media has so many cool women?.... it's awesome right?... they're so complex and interesting.... you care about them, right?... tell me you care about them

destroying and betraying yourself for nothing all by yourself, handsome?

the losing dogs and i are engaging in insider trading

losing dog but no one bets on me because i Don’t even lose well enougj

adding geologist to my resume after hitting rock bottom